I, Anonymous Jan 15, 2020 at 4:00 am



I see Ops point, but this smacks of ungratefulness and entitlement. People give gifts to friends, coworkers, and others hosting holiday parties because it feels good or they think you’re just being modest. If you really don’t want people to bring things maybe ask them to make a donation of canned/non-perishable food/money/socks or blankets or whatever to your local homeless shelter (hopefully Seattle has some of those? It’s been particularly nasty and cold in recent days). Alternatively, rather than throw these things away, change your thinking and donate these unwanted items to a local charity/nonprofit of your choice? Plenty of people in need this time of year, and there are plenty of people who would treasure the things you wouldn’t give a second thought to- and just throw away.

A frontline homelessness support worker in


But giftgiving is their "love language!" Anon really has no recourse.


Donate your unwanted gifts to charity and get the fuck over yourself already.


@3 Yep!


If someone gifted you some head phones I would be happy to take them off your hands and put them to good use. (:


The picture is appropriate. Sounds like a privileged white leftist woman who is so entitled and spoiled that getting gifts is a sign of "oppression" for her.


Seriously just donate it all -- at least you have loved ones who care.


This scenario is the same as saying you don't eat meat and having a "friend" show up with a meat lover pizza anyway. It's the same as saying you don't date women and having a "friend" keep trying to set you up with one. Gift giver is acting like a jerk- in a socially acceptable way. This scenario is passive agressive contempt for person who doesn't want gifts.


Of all the problems to have in this world...


Instead of telling people not to bring gifts, tell them all gifts will be donated. See who brings gifts knowing that they'll be donated. They's the good ones.


It's sounds a lot like LW is addressing her mother, in which case there's nothing you can do about it. Unfortunately many common expressions of caring have little to do with the recipient's wants.

I always receive a bunch of random gift cards for Starbucks or national chain restaurants I won't use so I give them to a friend that's a high school counselor in charge of a homeless student program. Last time I got a Cheesecake Factory gift card (why? WHY?!) that she used in part to take students out the learn how to go to a restaurant. Literally these kids had not been to a restaurant before. My parents and inlaws feel good, I feel good, everyone wins.

If any of them had asked me to try on pants, however, I might lose my shit.



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