Heres last nights candidates! They were earnest—and awkward.
Here's last night's candidates! They were earnest—and awkward. SH

Last night, The Stranger and Washington Bus joined forces to blast politically-engaged Seattleites off to the stars for Candidate Survivor 2017: A Seattle Space Odyssey. Mayoral candidates Nikkita Oliver, Cary Moon, Jessyn Farrell, Jenny Durkan, Bob Hasegawa, Mike McGinn, and Jason Roberts duked it out on the Neumos stage, showing off their talents, brains, and political chops to win civics nerds' hearts (and votes). Stranger City Hall reporter Heidi Groover served on the judges board, perhaps a little against her will.

In case you couldn't join in on the festivities, here are all of last night's highlights—and some incredibly cringeworthy moments...

But first: If you don't want to experience the night through tweets (many of which were sent out while under the influence of a pot lozenge), check out our Facebook live videos. Here's round one, two, and three.

Round one: Quickfire Q&A

Washington Bus Executive Director Emilio Garza grilled each candidate for a minute.

Round Two: The Political Spectrum

All candidates were given a single-use "explain" card, which could be used to give a one-minute explanation of their position on any issue.

All candidates said they supported and aligned with the #BlackLivesMatter movement. But what about the #BlueLivesMatter? Durkan was a solid "yes."

After this round, audience members texted in their votes to eliminate two candidates from the survivor race. Oliver won the first two rounds, to much applause, and McGinn and Roberts were axed. The remaining candidates were all women and people of color.

Round 2.5: "Talent"

Moon gave a fake TED Talk about how to run for mayor. It's charming as hell.

Hasegawa, donning a fedora (???), played flute, vaped, and jammed to hip-hop.

Durkan channeled her inner Melissa McCarthy and transformed into Sean "Spicey" Spicer to roast her fellow candidates. It was unexpected and fucking hilarious—until she used the term "colored person."

After the former U.S. attorney's performance, one judge reminded her that the modern term for non-white folks is "people of color." Come on, Jenny!

Farrell took the stage with a band to play George Michaels "Careless Whisper," which included her own lyrics and a thirsty plea for The Stranger's endorsement.

Oliver spits a song. The judges praise her with fire emoji signs, the crowd goes wild.

In the next round of votes, Durkan and Hasegawa are cut from the race. Durkan apologizes for using "colored person" and chalks it up to being in-character as Spicer.

The remaining candidates were Farrell, Moon, and Oliver. If these three were any indication, Seattle could be led by a woman for the first time in 91 years!

Round Three: The Final Three Get Grilled

Farrell took a question from judge Sonny Nguyen, public safety coordinator in the Chinatown-International District, about how she would have approached the controversial Navigation Center homeless shelter. Little Saigon community members have long opposed the low-barrier shelter on grounds of being excluded from city process.

How can Moon self-fund her own campaign? And with money like that, how can she relate to low- and middle-income Seattleites? Her answer to the first question: White privilege.

Who would Oliver choose to head up city offices such as the Department of Construction and Inspections and Seattle Department of Transportation? Her answer: Hopefully people as smart as Moon and Farrell—but, more likely, she would conduct a national search.

A question for all three candidates: What's the next big LGBTQ+ issue?

After the final round of votes-by-text, Oliver clinched the Candidate Survivor 2017 title. Could this be a sign of a victory to come?