TELEVISION, JOEL R. L. PHELPS & THE DOWNER TRIO
(EMP) It seems somehow un-punk for a punk band to reunite, but Television has already done so a couple of times since two late-'70s-era albums--Marquee Moon and Adventure--helped define the band as a huge influence on post-punk and the New York scene. The band's underground slow-burn was rekindled with the 1982 release of live performances that showcased the kind of jamming that earned Television the two-sided reputation as the Grateful Dead of punk. In the intervening two decades, members have played parts in bands like the Heartbreakers and the Waitresses, and lead singer Tom Verlaine has put together some conceptual film scores. This EMP performance is only the second one since the latest reconstitution, and it's sure to draw a bunch of diehard fans who will not, at any price, let you change the channel. TRACI VOGEL

THE YEAH OH HELL YEAHS, DJ KAYROO, DJ SIMON BLACK DOG, DJ SPANKYPANTS
(Sunset Tavern) The first night of the Sunset's one-year anniversary celebration will be rung in by the Yeah Oh Hell Yeahs, a garage-country band, as well as a slew of DJs who aren't actually professionals. According to Max, the tavern's owner, these are just friends of his, and they'll be playing "hits" from the '70s, '80s, and '90s. It seems then that this Thursday night is the real celebration--a Ballard-style, casual good time had by a bunch of people who are perhaps more interested in just enjoying themselves after an excellent first year than putting on a slick, polished rock and roll show to celebrate. The man who answered the phone at the Sunset last Thursday described the Yeah Oh Hell Yeahs in the following manner: "They played here once. I think they're a punk band. Anyway, the bartenders really liked them." Aww, happy birthday, then. JEFF DeROCHE

BJÖRN AGAIN
(Showbox) Though their voices can only approximate the honey-spun, roller-disco arias of Agnetha Faltskog and Frida, ABBA cover band Björn Again makes up for any musical shortcomings with reverent audacity (and ABBA/Police medleys). In appearance, Björn Again's members actually resemble ABBA, down to shiny pantyhose, strawberry lip gloss, and fancy, Cameron Diaz-style pleated-and-winged tulle shawls. Even their names--Agnetha Falstart, Frida Longstokin, Benny Anderwear, and Björn Volvo--mimic ABBA's, with the sharpness of a Charles Busch play. When you consider that the output of ABBA's ridiculously poppy enthusiasm is equal to its album sales (12,500,000 copies of the group's greatest-hits album, Abba Gold, have been sold since being released in 1992), it's appropriate that such a campy substitute has sprouted in its place. Expect all the hits. JULIANNE SHEPHERD

THE NEW PORNOGRAPHERS, LITTLE CHAMPIONS, EX-HUSTLERS
(Crocodile) See preview this issue.

HOLLY GOLIGHTLY, THE WOGGLES, NEW ORIGINAL SONIC SOUND
(Sit & Spin) See preview this issue.

764-HERO, POOR RICH ONES, THE SIX PARTS SEVEN, OMA YANG
(Paradox) Kent, Ohio's Six Parts Seven falls into that currently vogue niche of pretty-yet-visceral instrumental band, lilting and introspective one minute, explosive and evocative the next. Think Low or Mojave 3 without the vocals, or Tortoise without the pretense. Norway's Poor Rich Ones have been likened to Radiohead, Catherine Wheel, and even the Delgados; the quartet's soaring vocals and lush melodies prove those comparisons to be apt, ensuring this evening, with local pop heroes 764-HERO, and Oma Yang rounding out the bill, to be a memorable one. KATHLEEN WILSON

JOAN JETT & THE BLACKHEARTS, THE DONNAS
(EMP) Joan Jett may not give such a damn about her reputation as to shave her head in order to star in the Broadway production of The Rocky Horror Picture Show, or lend her songs to television advertising, but she's still the High Priestess of Girl Rock, and her inclusion in EMP's celebration of its first year in business is pure inspiration. And you can tell the Donnas cut their teeth on Runaways albums, making this pairing near genius. KATHLEEN WILSON

THE CHRIS AND TAD SHOW, THE MODEL ROCKETS, THE BAND THAT MADE MILWAUKEE FAMOUS, DJ MF CAKE
(Sunset) The Chris and Tad Show, featuring Chris Ballew (PUSA, Giraffes, Subset), is the goofy project of a couple very talented musicians. This is not a show for rock and roll aesthetes or music snobs. In fact, the Chris and Tad Show is the kind of band I don't imagine ever having any genuine, diehard fans. But the songs are great, and the Chris and Tad Show is certainly a bright choice to continue celebrating the Sunset's year anniversary--via an uptempo mixed bag of very dumb songs written by a couple of very smart guys. Chris and Tad are assloads of fun. JEFF DeROCHE

NADA SURF, ULTIMATE FAKEBOOK, SHEILA DIVINE
(Graceland) Fans of watery, melodic, and energetic pop music will giddily swallow everything about this show. Nada Surf's "Popular" was one of the better sucky rock songs of the '90s ("I'm a movie star... I'm popuuular!"), and for that song alone this might even be a worthwhile event. However, Ultimate Fakebook is downright irritating--bombastic, melodramatic, idiotic power pop that features lyrics like, "The movie that's called 'Life Sucks' stars everyone!" over revved-up start-stop guitar parts that must honestly just be humiliating to the fool who's playing them. Ultimate Fakebook is an onslaught of big melody, boyish harmony, and the compulsion to be heard. If the band were 50 times more intelligent and sophisticated, it would be Weezer. JEFF DeROCHE

MOUSE ON MARS, VERT, KINSKI
(Graceland) See Bio Box.

PUBLIC ENEMY, SOURCE OF LABOR
(EMP) See Stranger Suggests.

RADIOHEAD
(Gorge) See Stranger Suggests.

SMOG
(Crocodile) With last year's Dongs of Sevotion, Bill Callahan's Smog continued the expansion to his musical fun house begun on 1999's Knock Knock, an album that featured child choruses on two songs for a creepy lullaby effect just this side of Rosemary's Baby. Mixing Afro-beats, alt-country, and his usual lo-fi folk-rock miserablism, Callahan furthered his method songwriting, wrestling his demons in tales of lust, despair, and frustration, and even touching on spiritual yearning. The skeletal arrangements maintained their indie sound but Callahan seemed to be stretching out a bit beyond his Madonna-whore complex. The sinister ambiguity of "Dress Sexy at My Funeral" summed up Smog's strengths and pitch-black humor nicely, sounding like the late Bill Hicks if he had forgone standup and taken to his bedroom with a four-track. NATE LIPPENS

KIMBALL COLLINS, GEORGE ACOSTA, DJ FEDERAL
(Showbox) As Euro-centric club culture ebbed onto our shores from across the Atlantic during the mid '80s, it was tough for Yankee DJs to get any respect. This was no more true than in trance, which was, and still is, dominated primarily by British blokes like Paul Oakenfold, Sasha, and John Digweed. And that makes the club cred of Florida's Kimball Collins all the more impressive. Collins, who began DJ-ing in 1987, helped turn the fledgling Orlando scene into one of this country's rave capitals by the late '90s, dropping track after track of cool, edgy trance. Created in the studio with partner Rich Dekkard, Collins' Hardlife/Lushlife became a club favorite on both sides of the pond in 1993, and the following year he became the first DJ to mix a volume in the United DJs of America series. Collins brings his veteran skills to the decks tonight at the Showbox, where he'll be joined by fellow Floridian George Acosta, the garage-house DJ and remixer extraordinaire from Miami known for laying down soul-elevating sets everywhere from South Beach's Shadow Lounge to Berlin's Love Parade. JOHN FERRI

THE BRIEFS, THE RAZORBABES, NEW TOWN ANIMALS
(Sit & Spin) In case you haven't yet read this week's installment of It's My Party, the Briefs are the latest local band to capture the eye of a bigtime, major label. Following a showcase last month at Hollywood rock club the Viper Room, the band was wined and dined by Interscope label head Jimmy Iovine, who signed the catchy new-wavish punk four-piece on the spot. KATHLEEN WILSON

DAMIEN JURADO BAND, DOWN PILOT, SLEEPYSTART
(Tractor Tavern) Damien Jurado remains one of Seattle's criminally undercelebrated singer/songwriters. His introspective lyrics, inventive melodies, and sweetly passionate singing voice, as well as his genuine on-stage charm, make Jurado, in a fair world, a local artist destined for greatness. KATHLEEN WILSON

NO. 13 BABY, TRACHTENBURG FAMILY SLIDESHOW PLAYERS
(Sunset Tavern) Seattle's excellent Pixies cover band, No. 13 Baby, and Seattle's favorite band-composed-of-an-entire-bizarre-family-led-by-a-strange-and-talented-man-named-Jason close out the Sunset's weekend-long celebration of its one-year anniversary. JEFF DeROCHE

BILLY JOE SHAVER, CHRIS BROWN & KATE FENNER
(Tractor Tavern) It's poetic justice that the "pa" of outlaw--the hard-living country music made famous in the '70s--is a man like Billy Joe Shaver. He's written songs for Elvis, Tom T. Hall, the Allman Brothers, Kris Kristofferson, and countless others, including penning what is thought to be the first true outlaw album--the 1973 release Honky Tonk Heroes, for Waylon Jennings. But nobody can do a better job of wringing redemption from these tales of woe, women, and whiskey than this big man with his worn and warm voice. "I got all my country learning," he sings, "picking cotton, raising hell, and bailing hay." And you can hear this truth in every word and every chord. TAMARA PARIS

OZZFEST 2001 W/BLACK SABBATH, MARILYN MANSON, SLIPKNOT, PAPA ROACH, LINKIN PARK, CRAZY TOWN
(Gorge) Alice Cooper's great-granddaughter, Marilyn Manson, is the most underrated rock band in America. Sure it's popular with the disposable teens, but the shoegazing indie-rock 1990s always kept Manson at bay, not allowing the group to be taken seriously. Here's the deal: While hipsters seem to appreciate the meta-metal of grunge or the cool irony of digging Sabbath and Zeppelin, Manson's straight-up, catchy teenage-protest-rock has been wrongly underappreciated. And there are some great lyrics to go along with those glowing guitars: "Some children died the other day/we fed machines and then we prayed/puked up and down in morbid faith/you should have seen the ratings that day." JOSH FEIT

BIOGRAPHY OF FERNS, CHIEF, BURNING CRUSADES
(Graceland) There's a weird, dragging feel to Biography of Ferns' music: a laziness to the three-piece's tempo that makes a person wish the band would take it up a notch here and there. But there's something to that dragging feel that grows on me every time I listen to the band's excellent Merchants of Sleep and Purpose. The sound is all parts youthful and aggressive, moving from noodly power pop through straightforward Clash riffs, into the spots that shine brightest, like 1979 new wave/art punk à la Gang of Four and the Cure. Singer/guitarist Justin Hamacher, while in possession of a fine voice (I'm not sure whether he's British or not, but if he isn't, he better own that accent of his) is actually a far more interesting guitar player--especially when he gets scrappy, like a slightly dazed Andy Gill. JEFF DeROCHE

THE DUTCH FLAT, WATERY GRAVES, TEXAS FUNERAL, THE STAR DEATH
(Crocodile) Here's a bill that reflects Seattle's often incongruous music scene: the Dutch Flat plays what most would describe as math rock, while Watery Graves displays an almost careless regard to its grunge-influenced, bass-heavy compositions. Incongruent unto itself is Texas Funeral, which blends blues, rockabilly, and buttrock (with harmonica!), kicking off a show that should keep audiences rolling with the musical punches. KATHLEEN WILSON

THE GIRLY FREAK SHOW
(Graceland) This is one freak show that you'll follow hypnotized into the dark tunnels of the Fun House. They breathe fire! They cut up cigarettes with whips! They floss nasally with chains! They survive electric shocks! Your tour leader into these depraved depths is Slymenstra Hyman of GWAR, accompanied by Zamora, the Torture King, formerly of the Jim Rose Circus, known for chopping up sausage on his chest and poking metal rods through various body parts. Like the Jim Rose Circus, the Girly Freak Show is a weird combination of glam-rock costuming and good old-fashioned gross-out fun, including contortionists, burlesque, and stunts. You'll gasp at the offense. TRACI VOGEL

SLIM MOON, MONA REELS
(Old Fire House) As a kind of West Coast Bob Holman, Slim Moon has played an important role in showcasing subversive spoken word and poetry with the Wordcore series on his Kill Rock Stars label. He has released records of performance-art maven Penny Arcade's scathing mini-monologues, and punk luminary Exene Cervenka's incendiary avant-verse shards. His own poetry is digressive and shaggy, with brilliant offhand insights that cut all the more deeply for their laconic delivery. Seeing him a few years ago in a soon-to-be-torn-down storefront space reading and spieling late into the night was a charming and weirdly life-affirming experience. Moon came across as a young, punkish cross between Utah Phillips' storytelling and Tim Dlugos' vibrant poetry. NATE LIPPENS