COREY GUTCH, the Turn-Ons (guitar)
Do you think Bent is an important event?
Anytime you can see a group of sweaty fags or dykes playing loud guitars is a good night in my book.
Hips or lips?
LIPS, preferably with Prada Shielding SPF15 lip balm on, like J.Lo uses.
How many dates before you'll eat ass?
Who needs a date?
How do you get four fags on a bar stool?
With cheese!
JAY HARRISON, Fairgrove (vox/keys)
How important would you say your sexual orientation is to your identity as a musician?
I don't think it's important at all as a musician, but as a person it has some bearing for sure.
Have you ever had sex in a park?
Yes. I've had sex almost everywhere.
Would you consider yourself an alcoholic?
Only on Saturdays.
How do you get four fags on a bar stool?
Put me on it.
ALAN WILEY, solo performer
Would you consider yourself an alcoholic?
I'm not an alcoholic, but we've all had our moments. I do love to put away a sixer of Red Stripe every once in a while, and I'm always good to down a few Long Islands before public-humiliation events like karaoke. Hey, I've even been drunk the last five nights in a row.... Wow. Maybe I am an alcoholic.
MITCH FURY, the Skinjobs (guitar/vox/drums)
Do you think its important that we have a festival like Bent?
How else would we all get laid? I'm tired of fuckin' yuppie disco bunnies!
What do you call a can of tuna in a lesbian's house?
Sorry Charlie, I don't want fish that tastes good, I want fish with good taste. As you may have become aware, I don't eat fish. Just cock... I mean chicken.
CHRISTIAN SMITH, Sherri Manilow (bass)
Have you ever had sex in a park?
I've had sex in a car that was in park. Does that count?
No. Would you consider yourself an alcoholic?
Wouldn't you?
With how many men would you say you've had sex?
I haven't had sex with any men I'd say I've had sex with.
JON GINOLI, Pansy Division (vox/guitar)
How many show- bookings would you say you've had based solely upon your sexual orientation?
Less than five percent of our shows, over the years. We've rarely played gay bars--gay people don't like their cruising interrupted. The music isn't what they're accustomed to in that setting, and DJ-type sound systems are lousy for live bands. We've played a bunch of gay pride events, though.
Have you ever had an STD?
I caught crabs once, but long before I moved to the big city. I wrote a song about it, "Crabby Day," on our first album. I have never been big on bathhouses or sex clubs, which I think helps. I believe neither Chris nor Luis from our band has ever set foot in one.
How many dates before you'll eat ass?
In 10 years of doing Pansy Division interviews, no one has ever asked me this question before. Next!
BEN ERICKSON, Mountain Con (keys)
How important would you say your sexual orientation is to your identity as a musician?
I'm quite confident that if I wasn't gay I would not be a musician. I think if I was straight I'd be a very successful body builder and/or quarterback for the Seattle SuperSonics.
Have you ever had sex in a park?
Only once, and that was with the wizard who lives atop the observation tower, and I only let it happen because I thought he loved me. He didn't, though--he just used me for my magic. Do you believe in magic?
Would you consider yourself an alcoholic?
No. I drink to forget that I'm alone.
Top or bottom?
I'm proud to be a bottom and an American.
How do you get four fags on a bar stool?
Everybody knows that: Turn the stool upside-down. It also helps if you have some Zima on hand.
Sorry, ladies. Though several of the female artists scheduled to appear at Bent were asked to contribute to this article, only one responded, and she seemed pretty annoyed. Perhaps it was the tuna question?
