ANITA GOODMANN'S THANKSGIVING SANDWICH
So now they've closed the damn Lobby. Well, technically the damn Lobby will allegedly be "relocating" or whatever (I'll believe it when I see it), but the point is, they've been given the boot. Can you feel my rage? Most terrible it is, indeed. Of course, I barely ever went to the damn Lobby (the wallpaper gives me epileptic seizures), but that's quite beside the point. Yet another long-held queer venue has been snatched away in the desperate Capitol Hill landgrab. (I'm surprised developers haven't draped the neighborhood in smallpox blankets... yet.) There are rumors that even more queer establishments are doomed to fall soon—rumors far too terrible to even contemplate! As a consequence, our queer diaspora is being flung far and wide. Where will Lily Armani and her Hashtag go? A mystery. Sylvia O'Stayformore has set up shop in both Georgetown and Columbia City, and even Anita Goodmann has absconded all the way to Greenwood, so that's where you're going to have to go see our first event this week, Anita's new Thanksgiving show, "The Anita Goodmann Experience Turkey Sandwich." It's an interesting concept: two totally different shows (the follow-up episode is Friday, November 28) that work synergistically to create a single manic holiday adventure. "They work together if you see them both!" Anita informs us, and you'll want to, what with a cast including the ridiculously ridiculous Gary Gloryhole (recent HUMP! award winner), Miss Cassie O'Hara, and Benjamin Thomas. But see just one show, see both, whatever; you're going to have to leave our hallowed Hill and burn fossil fuels to do it. Grumble. The Pocket Theater, 8 pm, $10 ($15 for both nights) adv/$14 DOS, 18+.
SPEAKING OF SMALLPOX BLANKETS...
WHY DON'T YOU JUST STAY THE HELL HOME AND EAT TURKEY OR HAM OR SOMETHING FOR CHRIST'S SAKE? Lord.
THE EAGLE GOES "ARF!"
Zak the Barber is surely one of the most fascinating creatures in all of gay Seattle. He is, yes, an actual barber (HE MAKE ER'BODY SO PRIDDY!), but he's also a driving creative force and a master of astonishing drag creations. He's also apparently a wee bit kinky, as evinced by his new fetish night: Arf!, an evening dedicated to the esoteric arts of kink, fetish, and bathhouse disco. It's a new night for gearheads and the gearhead curious, and we are encouraged to "strap some things in, let other things hang out, and take a dip in the puppy pile." Sounds appropriately filthy to me. The Eagle, 9 pm, $7 in gear/$10 without, 21+. 
