" If my hair gets any longer, I'm gonna have to get it cut."

As if there's a chance hair won't grow. Maybe if you hope hard enough, it won't!

good lord, is this really what you're planning on replacing grandy's fucking in the streets with, a twitter roundup? at least give Jason a chance to write more about his robot ear music or whatever else he listens to

Look, I'm not gonna say this isn't funny. It is. But it's also pretty damn lazy.

Renter's insurance is for suckers.