Trash haulers: Back to work, and back at the bargaining table.
Prompt Global Strike: All the accuracy and destruction of a nuclear warhead, without the nuclear warhead.
Oil: Not spilling in huge quantities after the rig explosion off Louisiana.
Deadly fungus: "Spreading among people and animals in the Northwestern United States."
Unmanned U.S. spacecraft: It lifted off, and the rest is top secret.
Greece: A sinking ship, according to its prime minister, and very ready for a bailout.
Wave of bombings: In Iraq.
Krugman: Don't cry for Wall Street.
The Lindsey Graham sex tape: A call for its release.
Biden looking crazy: A tribute slideshow.
And Stewart reprises Go Fuck Yourself, this time in defense of South Park: