News Feb 15, 2016 at 2:04 pm

Right-Wing Loons: Obama Had Scalia Killed!

Dan Savage
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Comments

1
...And our plan would have worked too, if not for that meddling Alex Jones!
Gurldoggie on February 15, 2016 at 2:12 PM Report this
3
Scandal! Has Colonel Mustard's whereabouts been accounted for that night!?!
mikethehammer on February 15, 2016 at 2:26 PM Report this
5
Fix that first link, Dan.
cccCody on February 15, 2016 at 2:35 PM Report this
6
...er, second. The one that says RightWingWatch.
cccCody on February 15, 2016 at 2:36 PM Report this
7
But of course! There is no other reasonable explanation for the death of an overweight 79 yr. old, whose private physician stated suffered from multiple health issues to die. And we can be certain that his family is in on the whole thing, otherwise they would have demanded an autopsy.
TampaDink on February 15, 2016 at 2:37 PM Report this
8
Nuttier than a squirrel, but since when is Alex Jones "right wing"? He's the crazy that knows no political affiliation. The biggest Alex Jones fan I had the displeasure of meeting was also big in the Greenpeace, BLM, & OWS scenes, none of which I would describe as "right wing."
XiaoGui17 on February 15, 2016 at 2:39 PM Report this
9
Answer me this, conspiracy braintrust: If Obama was going to have Scalia killed, why did he wait till he had less than a year left in office, when everyone knows that appointing a replacement will be nearly impossible? Why didn't he ice Scalia, say, five or six years ago, or even six months ago, when he had plenty of time to appoint a replacement?
Reverse Polarity on February 15, 2016 at 2:41 PM Report this
10
@9: it took that long to persuade Scalia to put something in his will about wanting to be cremated. As a doctrinaire Catholic, Scalia really held out on that and it held everything up.
originalcinner on February 15, 2016 at 2:49 PM Report this
11
@8 Alex Jones has what middle age males are afflicted with, paranoia. He may not a "true" political affiliation, but his thoughts and paranoia are more at home with really right wing conservatives. Glenn Beck may not have the severe case of behavioral problems as Alex Jones, but he is pretty paranoid as well. They will share the same rhetoric at times, like look up how both do diatribes on George Soros..

The problem with paranoid people, they really do think the world is out to get them, it is very difficult to treat. Alex Jones needs serious mental health treatment, not a microphone.
ferret on February 15, 2016 at 2:51 PM Report this
12
@4 as loony as the conspiracy theory that republicans know how to govern. What's your point?
JonnoN on February 15, 2016 at 2:52 PM Report this
13
@9 It takes lots of money and time to train quails to act like ninja assassins.
ferret on February 15, 2016 at 2:52 PM Report this
14
I know when I suffocate people with a pillow I always leave it on top of their head to throw off the police.
dwightmoodyforgetsthings on February 15, 2016 at 3:13 PM Report this
15
Dan Savage can joke about this, but where was Obama that night? ...did he slip out unnoticed for a little side trip on Air Force One? (pretty sure he did!). Our formerly-great country is under attack by west & east coast libs, who will do anything to disrupt our peaceful way of life. I remember the days when I could go to a bakery & not be assaulted by the homosexual agenda ...now by the time I get my Napoleon some queer has my cock in his mouth & I end up spending the night at his place!
blackhook on February 15, 2016 at 3:13 PM Report this
16
Wow, no one else noted the striking fact that Scalia and Savage share perverted pillow-on-face sleeping fetishes?
Jude Fawley on February 15, 2016 at 3:24 PM Report this
17
Hercule Poirot enters.

"The murderer... or should I say... murderers(!) are in this VERY ROOM!"

The lasagna and the cigarette look very, very nervous, start stealthily slinking toward the door.
bobbyjoe on February 15, 2016 at 3:30 PM Report this
18
I also sometimes sleep with a pillow on my head. But maybe I aughta stop. I don't wanna end up like Mr. Scalia.
Whirled without end on February 15, 2016 at 3:38 PM Report this
19
Obama Had Scalia Killed!

And the sad thing is he'll probably get away with it, just like Bill Clinton got away with killing Kurt Cobain.
seandr on February 15, 2016 at 3:53 PM Report this
21
@15

This classic:

http://www.theonion.com/blogpost/why-do-…
seatackled on February 15, 2016 at 4:15 PM Report this
22
@3. It was Miss Scarlett in the conservatory with the rope.
Clayton on February 15, 2016 at 4:16 PM Report this
23
@8 - Since when? Since forever. He defines right wing. He's a birther and a Bircher and a bitcher, all wrapped up in one wacko package. His pic is in the Webster dicktionary under Right Wing, and he'll only eat buffalo wings from the birds right wings.
sperifera on February 15, 2016 at 4:26 PM Report this
24
We're going to ban guns now? Cool. That was easy.
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn on February 15, 2016 at 4:31 PM Report this
25
I solved this one. Ruth Bader Ginsburg was playing the long con. She suffered through hundreds of hours of opera and pretending to be Scalia's "friend" all so she could smother him in his sleep. Even now, she pretends to mourn her best friend. Nice try, but I figured out the truth!!!!
DrVanNostrand on February 15, 2016 at 4:42 PM Report this
26
If I thought for one moment that Obama had anything to do with Nino's death, I'd back him for a third term.
J.R. on February 15, 2016 at 5:00 PM Report this
27
@25 Actually, RBG gave him poisoned cannoli while they were watching a production of Cavalleria Rusticana. The pillow was a ruse.
bobbyjoe on February 15, 2016 at 5:04 PM Report this
28
Infowars was literally the first site I went to after I heard the news because I was sure they would spin this into a conspiracy ASAP. I was surprised to not find anything: "Hmm...maybe they realize how dumb they'd look to find conspiracy under every rock..." But I was wrong. They just needed more time to flog the thousand monkeys that write their articles.
Patrick McGrath on February 15, 2016 at 5:12 PM Report this
29
Is a SC judge with a pillow on his head anything like a rabbit with a pancake on its head?
originalcinner on February 15, 2016 at 5:12 PM Report this
30
I'd rather not drag Justice Ginsburg into this. Assume that she did like him on a personal level as we hear and let her mourn in peace.
seatackled on February 15, 2016 at 5:14 PM Report this
31
@8: the eminently trustworthy site, Conservapedia, says that Alex Jones is a paleoconservative. I'm pretty sure that means "right wing nut job".
originalcinner on February 15, 2016 at 5:15 PM Report this
32
Bill Hicks would sooo hate Alex Jones's "guts" by now. #RIP
droctopu5 on February 15, 2016 at 5:23 PM Report this
33
"bad actors may have slipped something into the justice’s drink to trigger a heart attack"

Yes, they did. They slipped a drink into his drink. They slipped tiny bit of poison into him, unsuspecting, every night for 60 years straight. Fattening foods as well. And he fell right into the trap.
eclexia on February 15, 2016 at 5:38 PM Report this
34
Barack Obama is gay?
LavaGirl on February 15, 2016 at 5:44 PM Report this
36
Really? I heard that he had a heart attack during an amyl-nitrate enhanced evening of sex with prostitute, died on top of the hooker, who was trapped under Scalia until someone entered the room a while later. The hooker made a run for it, had to be found, killed, and the body disposed of while they concocted a cover story for Scalia's tawdry demise, hence the five-hour "delay" before the authorities made it to the ranch.
tiktok on February 15, 2016 at 7:29 PM Report this
38
@37

Aren't you the person who thinks ISIS is pulling the strings of anyone who is not an excessively violent police officer?
seatackled on February 15, 2016 at 8:22 PM Report this
39
So they're saying it's an Obama plot when there's a Clinton available to blame this "murder" on? Progress?
sophist2 on February 15, 2016 at 8:31 PM Report this
40
It's obvious the murderer was Steven Avery.
DanFan503 on February 15, 2016 at 9:20 PM Report this
41
...Then you realize, Obama is one vote away from being able to ban guns...
hahahahahahahahahahaha!

Oh, you were serious? Let me laugh even harder.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Urgutha Forka on February 15, 2016 at 10:08 PM Report this
43
@21 seatackled - thanks for that, I couldn't stop laughing!
blackhook on February 16, 2016 at 12:57 AM Report this
44
Huh. I had heard it was theclintons who had him killed, which we know because his arms were crossed, just like Vince Foster. Apparently theclintons hire the stupidest hitman in the world, who takes all the trouble to make it look like a heart attack and then "signs" his work.

Also, he dropped a matchbook from Joe's Bar that had theclintons phone number written on it.
Aurora Erratic on February 16, 2016 at 6:58 AM Report this
45
If only the true-blooded conservatives at this private ranch had armed themselves to prevent this sort of attack.
rtm on February 16, 2016 at 7:42 AM Report this
46
They really have a high opinion of how organized us lefties are.
Cato the Younger Younger on February 16, 2016 at 7:45 AM Report this
47
I sleep with a pillow over my head often. Just sayin'
DarkHorseRising on February 16, 2016 at 7:49 AM Report this
48
@37"The point is that conspiracy theories coming from the left have a longer shelf life than the ones coming from the right."

Conspiracy theories are bits and pieces of information that binds together with paranoia. It really has nothing to do with political bent. It is more how political movements either denounces or validates the people who embrace the conspiracy theories. Glenn Beck is someone who may be embrace by some conservatives like Ted Cruz, but he was also fired from Fox News, because he went over the line a couple times, like his rants on George Soros.

I know you feel like a victim for being a right wing fascist, but paranoia and batshit behavior is pretty non partisan.
ferret on February 16, 2016 at 8:20 AM Report this
49
@4
as loony as the conspiracy theory that 'W & Cheney engineered 9/11 to start a war for oil.


Despite your bloviating, bringing the 2nd largest reserve of oil (Iraq) to market is still the most rational explanation for Bush and Cheney (former oil men) blowing 3 trillions dollars and lying through their teeth to justify invading Iraq.
anon1256 on February 16, 2016 at 8:51 AM Report this
50
@37
The point is that conspiracy theories coming from the left have a longer shelf life than the ones coming from the right.


One can utter any fact-free drivel they want with confidence, it doesn't make it any more true.
anon1256 on February 16, 2016 at 8:54 AM Report this
51
@48 for establishment toadies like Raindrop, any hypothesis (no matter how well supported) that shows conservatives exercising political power in a poor light is "a conspiracy theory". Claiming that something is a conspiracy theory has become a widespread and convenient way to summarily dismiss any alternative explanation to the official narrative.
anon1256 on February 16, 2016 at 9:06 AM Report this
52
@29:

Or perhaps like a dog with a slice of ham on its face?
COMTE on February 16, 2016 at 9:51 AM Report this
54
Did you guys hear the one about Leonard Nimoy (RIP)?
http://harddawn.com/nimoy-and-obama-kill…

BTW that website is either the most homoerotic thing ever and/or a shining example of Poe's Law.
chi_type on February 16, 2016 at 8:32 PM Report this
55
@36
Scalia was killed so that the Mob would be able to control that prostitute with blackmail. 'This Justice has no real friends -- nobody knows what he was doing here. It'll be as if he never existed, except for all those precedents. All that's left is our friendship.'
Gerald Fnord on February 17, 2016 at 11:20 PM Report this

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