On the surface, every single vending machine in the airport is exactly alike: Shiny digitized contraptions operated by Better-For-You-Alternatives and stocked with snacks both traditional (Bugles, Ruffles) and nouveau (individually wrapped Pop Tarts, SnackWell's). To select the best, then, our readers looked past stock considerations and focused on the all-important criteria of locale. Location, location, location! SeaTac Stranger readers voted the vending machines in the main terminal the Best Airport Vending Machines. Stationed just outside of the airport's prohibitive, x-ray-powered gate entrances, these convenient vending machines allow hungry SeaTacians to purchase their snacks without having their beloved knives/handguns/controlled substances confiscated! And everyone knows that sour gummy worms taste better when you're fully armed! 17801 Pacific Hwy S.
BEST UNINTELLIGIBLE DRUNK
Hailing from Yugoslavia and devoid of any English language skills, Mr. Ahmiarghalia (pronounced aaamergerhlaghigahahaha) nevertheless regales SeaTacians with grand gestures and a sort of desperate, drunken grunting. Mr. Ahmliarghala regularly holds court at the Silver Dollar Casino, where he told our Best of SeaTac Research Team that "daughter Switzerland good table white gold." Mr. Ahmliarghala has fast become a beloved local character/landmark in the four short years he's lived in SeaTac, and this is his third Best of SeaTac award. 19222 International Blvd.
BEST PIE
Handmade on the premises, the pie at Dave's Diner has soothed many a local's late-night broken heart. The kinds of pies rotate at the whim of the pie chef, but locals say the banana cream "will whip your mama's ass" and the cherry incites "national nostalgia." And no wonder: Dave got the recipes from his mom herself, and although many cooks have had a crack at mom's pies, Bonnie the waitress says, "She'd still be proud of them, I think." Prices hover around $2.50/slice. S 192nd St and Pacific Hwy S.
BEST TACO CART
Perched invitingly on the outskirts of the Seattle Indoor Swap Meet parking lot, Taco Mexico serves about the best gol-darned food in SeaTac. And they do it out of the back of a truck! For $1.20, you can get a taco filled with your choice of an infinite and authentic variety of meats (brains, tongue, etc.) topped with pico de gallo, radishes, and other spicy things not identifiable in a parking lot at night. What this taco truck may lack in restaurant-y ambiance, it makes up for in quick service and surround-sound, provided by blasting stereos in nearby parked cars. All are welcome to try their hand at DJ-ing from behind their very own steering wheels, and the deeper you can make your bass felt, the better. Wolfing down a delectable taco al pastor (another meat product graced upon us by our friend, the pig), our research team could feel the ruling car's thump in their sphincters. Big Sound Car Audio is located to the immediate north of the Taco Mexico truck on Pacific Highway, for all your car-audio needs. 14802 International Blvd.
BEST SUSHI
Atami Japanese Restaurant transports SeaTac visitors and residents alike to a world beyond strip malls, runways, and detention centers, to the calm soul of SeaTac's Japanese culture. The interior of Atami features rice-paper screens, a sushi bar, and a private room offering traditional low-table dining. Poll respondents describe Atami as a favorite for sushi. "Since we go often," one wrote, "we are frequently given lots of unrequested things to try." 20023 International Blvd.
BEST HANGOVER BREAKFAST
The Bull Pen, a haphazardly converted Mexican family restaurant, still sports a brass-fenced area where the once-mighty mechanical bull pounded many an urban cowboy's ass. The drunk and reckless still gather in the pen, but it is with microphone in hand, staring hard at the karaoke video as the words to "Dust in the Wind" scroll past. Besides offering a few minutes of spotlighted glory, the Bull Pen's expert grill kings and fry boys inject in each lovingly crafted meal the exact dose of grease required to coat heaving stomachs and dried-out whistles. Cheap hair-of-the-dog treatments are available from understanding cocktail waitresses, and are part of what makes this local watering hole a perennial favorite and a Best of SeaTac multi-category champ. The hangover breakfast is best consumed in full view of the dueling television screens: On one side, Spanish soap operas turned up LOUD; opposing, in silent visual glory, car racing and rollerblading, which needs no language. 20011 Pacific Hwy S.
BEST PANCAKES
SeaTac Stranger readers agree that it takes a chef to produce the perfect flapjack. This overlooked art has been celebrated for 47 years in a small corner of old-town SeaTac at the delightfully preserved Pancake Chef. Paint-by-numbers renderings of small dogs with their young mistresses grace the walls and are available for purchase at the register, making a fabulous souvenir of a trip to a time when breakfast was simple, sweet, and starchy. S 152nd St and Military Rd S.
BEST DENNY'S
Chicago likes to boast about having two baseball teams, but we SeaTacians can take pride in our two (count 'em!) Denny's. Every year for our Best of SeaTac ballot, we ask you which Denny's is best: the Denny's on Pacific Highway South and 188th or the Denny's on Pacific Highway South and 172nd. Last year, the Denny's on Pacific Highway South and 172nd took the prize, but in a startling upset, this year's Best Denny's was awarded to the Denny's on Pacific Highway South and 188th! The consistent quality of the "Moons over My Hammy" at the 188th Denny's clinched it. Voters also said the eggs are slightly less runny and the ham less fatty at the 188th Denny's than they are at the 172nd Denny's. Apparently, the "grime" in the vinyl caulking of the booths at the Denny's on 188th smells less funny than the "grime" in the caulking of the Denny's on 172nd, too. We have a winner!
BEST PIZZA
SeaTac's best pizza comes from a robotic pizza maker that actually resides in West Seattle most of the year. Each year, West Seattle's David Levin trucks his X-Treme Machine to Angle Lake Park for the annual Angle Lake International Fair. (International? Yes! Bands from at least three or four countries perform, and food booths offer pasta from Italy, corn dogs from Great Britain, and curly fries from the Land of Curly Fries.) For $3.50, pizza lovers can watch as a pan lined with dough passes along a conveyor belt, and is subjected to the ministrations of a red sauce-spreading machine, a pepperoni-dropping machine, a sausage-dumping machine, and finally a cheese-sprinkling machine. At the end of the conveyor belt, a small enclosed elevator lowers the pie to a second belt moving in the opposite direction, carrying your pizza safely through an efficient oven resembling the fiery pits of hell. In three minutes, you've got pizza! And not a single nose-picking teenager has handled your food. 19408 International Blvd.
BEST AIRPORT BAR
C. J. Borg's, the winner by a landslide, is an always-hoppin' watering hole with no shortage of friendly vibes or faithful fans stopping by to knock back a cold one. Along with tons of microbrews and kick-ass nachos, here's why devoted regulars give C. J. Borg's the thumbs-up:
1. Borg's delicious "Specialty Drinks," including their "infamous" Borg-a-Rita (a stiff margarita with Cointreau).
2. The Brewmaster's Pizza, which is considered by most SeaTac regulars to be God's Perfect Food: Eggs scrambled with cheese, onions, and peppers, with a choice of bacon or sausage on a focaccia crust. Only at C. J. Borg's!
3. The awesome view of Alaska Airlines' loading area: Diners can observe Alaska's finest hard at work.
4. The gorgeous, and most importantly, complimentary Wurlitzer jukebox, which cranks out Billboard rock for an all-ages crowd, with hit singles from 1959 through '84. Song titles include "Maniac," "Total Eclipse of the Heart," "Splish Splash," and "Mack the Knife."
5. C. J. Borg's legendary chef's-hat collection, which has been personally autographed by celebrities like Liberace, Jerry Lewis, Lorne Greene, and Richard Nixon! 17801 Pacific Hwy S.
BEST REVOLVING RESTAURANT
You probably didn't know this important fact, but SeaTac is home to the second revolving restaurant ever built in the Puget Sound area! The SeaTac Holiday Inn, a basic white modernist slab (built in 1969), displays the curved windows of the restaurant cheekily poking out from the top of the otherwise flat façade. Once inside and up the elevator, you find yourself in a lovely room whose round center area is raised and mounted on a mechanized lazy Susan, which gracefully completes one rotation an hour. Better yet, all the waiters can and do sing, accompanied by a player piano. Better still, a live piano player arrives for Friday and Saturday nights. Best of all, there's karaoke every Tuesday and Wednesday night! Karaoke plus drinks plus revolving restaurant plus dramatic views of Mt. Rainier and the parking lot and roof of the doomed Jet Motel next door--what could be better? 17338 International Blvd.
BEST WAITRESS
Stephanie Slick has worked at the Bull Pen as a waitress and bartender for seven years, and she's the favorite of SeaTacians everywhere. "I love this place," she says. "It's one of the last neighborhood bars in the area." In fact, the Bull Pen functions as part bar, part restaurant, part karaoke joint, and part community service center. "Usually people come here in the wintertime if they lose their lights or heat or something, from the trailer parks or outlying areas," says Slick. "Periodically, we put on auctions to raise money we keep in a fund for people, in case they have an emergency. I think that's part of the reason we have so many old-timers." Slick may be a softy, but she's got a tough side too, especially when she plays bartender: "I like to introduce people to one another sitting at the bar," she says. "Sometimes prostitutes or drug dealers come in, so to run them off, I tell them this is my corner. I control it." It's easy to see how charming, no-bullshit Slick won the hearts of SeaTacians and this year's designation as SeaTac's Best Waitress. 20011 Pacific Hwy S.
BEST AIRPORT WAITRESS
For the past 17 years, Patricia Ojendyke has consistently served C. J. Borg's patrons with exuberance and grace. "If I didn't like it, I wouldn't have stayed for so long," says Ojendyke, when asked about her impressive employment record. "In the beginning, we used to have more fun," she recalls. "We had dance routines... the entire staff entertained the customers! [Employees] had to audition, and it was a really big deal; customers would love it!" Nowadays, there are no more live performances ("We just got too busy"), but that doesn't stop Ojendyke from going the extra mile: When the subject of waiting on cranky, impatient, stressed-out travelers comes up, she just smiles diplomatically and says, "I just see those people as a challenge." The next time you sit in Ojendyke's section, you know what to do: Congratulate her on being named SeaTac's Best Airport Waitress, say "please" and "thank you," and leave a huge tip! 17801 Pacific Hwy S.
