How to Be High in Public

"Helpful" Tips

Comments

1
Images are too small to read.
2
Were you high when you posted this? It looks like you posted only a thumbnail of the actual images. Everything is super small and blurry when you zoom in. Can you put up the originals maybe?
3
This is so bad.
4
I can read it. Wait, no I can't...put down the bong please.
5
Sorry guys, we are having some technical difficulties getting the images to load properly, but hopefully soon you'll be able to see Emily's awesome comic in a legible form.
6
I'm getting high in the meantime.
7
Dear Stranger,

Colorbox JQuery responsive image plug-ins. Look into it.

Signed
—Every website since 2003
8
What is this, a comic for ants?
9
Do I need to be high to read it?
10
Wasn't worth reading anyway.
11
Thanks for fixing the image :)
12
I love the comics the Stranger has been putting out. I laugh out loud every time. It like being 10 years old and reading Mad Magazine. Just the best.
13
amateur smokers. all of em
14
It's so funny cuz it's all so true.....and yes, you need to get small before you read this article...either that or get big eyes, whichever works best...
15
EMILY NOKES! When did you start following me around writing down literally everything that happens to me all of the time? This is brilliant and all these jerks writing mean stuff are mean jerks who probably suck to hangout with. I know it’s your job to write publicly and absorb stupid shit like that, but I was so surprised to read that crapola because this ruled so hard.
16
I agree with 15. This is FUCKING HILARIOUS! I empathize with exactly everything Emily Nokes has described. Been there, done that.

Emily -- please put together a list of "don'ts" for eating magic fungus too - I'm sure you "have a friend" that can relay their experiences to you...
17
The sad thing is, I'm pretty sure I've done most of these things even when I'm not stoned.
18
More from Emily Nokes. I have done a lot of those and similar block headed things.
19
I don't remember the last time I laughed until I had to excuse myself from the room because too much fluid was coming out of all my face holes. I read the print version, which is now covered in snot (clear tho, cuz im healthy), but had to come here, make an account, and comment because I could hear the sound of whining like late-onset tinnitus.
I re-wrote this comment a lot
20
How to go to the convenience store while stoned (when you're in high school):

1. Realize you're hungry. Make plans to go to the convenience strore two blocks away. Discuss these plans at length as if you were discussing plans to invade Russia.

2. Get sidetracked when you decide to dress up your very-guyish guy friend in women's clothes for the trip to the store. Put a bra on him and stuff the boobs. Instruct him not to touch his fake boobs in public, because that will be a dead giveaway that he's a guy.

3. After what seems like hours, finally leave the house to go to the store.

4. Stand in the store for at least 10 or 15 minutes, bewildered by the array of snacks. Worry that the clerk knows you're stoned. Worry that everyone knows you're stoned. Worry that you won't be able to figure out the money part when you go to pay for stuff.

5. Buy a gigantic bag of barbeque flavoured Bugles or cheese doodles or some shit. Triumphantly return to the house with them. Remember suddenly that your guy friend is wearing a dress and makeup, and wonder if anyone noticed.

6. Tuck into the bag of junk food, covering yourself with glowing orange artificial food dust. Regret your choice of snack. Keep eating it anyway because you can't stop yourself.
22
Substitute 'stoned' for 'old' and you have my daily life.