Comments

1
Lol every time u post something to Terry I imagine u calling him like "hey can I link that one pic of your ass" before hitting post
2
"Research" equals "reading" suspicious websites that look like they were either geo cities or a big advert page. Bronze Age superstitious laws backs up a personal preference for the wind. I hate to be the one to have to sleep with her; she's probably as fun as a dead starfish.
3
This very issue came up on The Deuce in an episode.

Most of the Times Square '70s pumps were too squigged out to even discuss period sex of their women, despite living off the money made by their pussies.

Except the one dude who says, "I don't mind a little ketchup on my hot dog."
4
Seriously Dan, if god wanted us to eat candy corn, well first off I guess there would have to be a god, or gods, and they would have made it less gross. Sheesh.
5
I love how she describes herself as a "proud libertarian" and says she "loves to learn new things." Ahahaha.
6
FWIW, all of my long-term relationships eventually included period sex, and generally it begins the same way. You're having sex most every day over a few months, and when the next period arrives neither of you want to give up sex for several days. The first time, some partners have hedged, but I'll let them know I don't care if they don't care, and once you've started having period sex, it's no longer an issue in the relationship. Yes, it requires a bit of planning to keep your linens clean, and the time to wash up there after, but some people act like its going to make sex look like a murder scene.
7
She's disgusted by the internet because of period sex? Clearly she hasn't seen much of the internet...
8
The whole crazy screed and responses are worth it if only for the part where she argues with other people about how vampires won't eat 'dead blood' and other people cite Anne Rice novels to 'disprove' her.
9
It makes me sad that there are women out there this uncomfortable with their own bodies.
10
I love going down on my girlfriend when she has her period! Her regular flavor is lovely, but her period flavor adds some variety.

I don't understand the crazies who think menstruation = no sex.
11
As for the “I have a friend telling me Torah/Talmud family laws align with what I say in this thread” mentioned in the conversation:
A friend of a friend of a friend telling me that ancient Jewish guidelines are often contradicting each other, should be debated, and are open to interpretations.
The all-male Rabbis who follow the thinking that a woman is dirty during menstruation tell their followers that sex is not allowed on those days.
They also believe that despite being so dirty women’s hair and singing are way too tempting for men, hence women must wear wigs and are not allowed to sing when there are men in the audience.
Men in those communities are supposed to thank the Big G daily for not creating them a woman.
12
Of course you had to throw Candy Corn in there Dan.
13
If you think candy corn is icky, get ahold of yourself and get over it. Candy corn is sublime. I can understand reasonable disagreement about everything else, but not candy corn. It's like pure sugar caramel but more chemically and chewy and in brilliant colors. What's not to like?
14
How does sex during a period equal degeneracy. Has this girl ever had it, and what is degenerate about putting towels down and then enjoying the grainy odours and feel of blood infused sex.
15
Dan,

Is consent really enough? I don't think so. That is why you have a campsite rule, because a young inexperienced adult can consent to something that will do them no good.

That is why we qualify the word consent. It is not enougb to consent, you have to do it sober, or at least not too drunk. You can't ask your employee to consent because consent in a power imballance like that, could be real consent or it could be fear masquerading as consent.

So most of the time you need consent+.

Then as you have said in a marriage or an LTR, there can be an implied consent.

So I would argue with your tweet. Morality in sex starts with consent, but it doesn't end there.
16
Cory @10: Not wanting sex while on one's period is no more "crazy" than wanting sex on one's period. I'm not gonna shame your preferences, you shouldn't shame mine. Personally, at least the first day or so of my period, I feel gross and unsexy. It's not the blood -- as has been said, it's fairly easily cleaned up -- it's just that I am not in a sexy mood. Thankfully, as Sublime says, this is not a week-long phenomenon; past day one or two, I'm quite happy to put a towel down and enjoy. (Just not oral, that is a squick too far for me.)
17
When I still had a period, I was horniest and most easily orgasmic in the 12 hours before the flow started and for about the first 12 hours after. The absolute peak was in the 2 hours on either side of the very modest onslaught.

I appreciated having that to look forward to. And sometimes plan for.
18
@9 (ciods)

It's even sadder knowing that there are still many young people (not just women) who are indoctrinated (and made to feel shame) where anything below the waist is called "down there" and where any vaginal secretions are dirty ... especially dirty during one's period. On top of that misinformation, women are reminded they don't (so shouldn't) enjoy sex: they have it only to please their (male) partners.
19
Now I want a Guinness and some candy corn!

Re: Sex on period, I've said this all before, but STOP SAYING THAT WOMEN WHO DON'T HAVE SEX ON THEIR PERIOD ARE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THEIR BODIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not everyone's bodies are the same. My own period comes with heavy blood flow, thick with clots, loads of bloating, intense pain and diarrhea (prostaglandins are a thing). I'm not uncomfortable with my body. I just don't think pain, bloating and liquid shit are sexy.
20
Sex Ed in Trump-town.
21
Hawai'ian pizza is delicious! Gay marriage, though, I would have my personal doubts about.
22
Emma @19: Just to be clear, I'm not saying that women who prefer not to have sex on their period are uncomfortable with their bodies. I'm saying that this particular woman, who has gone on a long, detailed rant about periods, calling it degenerate to have sex during them, and claiming men and women shouldn't even be allowed to have physical contact at that time, is uncomfortable with her body.

It's the usual. Do what you want, but once you go on the internet and tell everyone else they have to do it too, because you think x is gross or bad or degenerate, you're over the line. And once someone feels that they have the right to say that about whatever type of sex, I tend to think it's because they're deeply uncomfortable. And that's too bad.
23
Period sex is not as good as non-period sex for this male. It is too slippery, the vagina doesn’t grip as tightly as during non-period sex. But other men and women may have different results.
24
@11, CMD. Yes, I'd heard re the thanking God line. Can't blame them really because it sucks bleeding out each month for decades.
I can imagine the princess on twitter when she first got on the rags. It's a shock for all of us, that first bit of blood arriving. Our freedom from the curse over for so many yrs. this girl must have been horrified. And ever since, when she plugs herself, or heaven forbid wears a pad.. it just must not feel right for such a special pure little flower, to have to go thru this, this, experience. Over and over.
Then to think a woman could open their legs, let the blood out and the stranger in. Just beyond comprehension.
25
24cont* could open her legs.
but you know, fuck it. Born in this body mysterious may be problemic due to complex reproductive mechanisms, it's still a body to be proud of.
26
Could I draw a distinction? There's preference, and then there's disgust. Count me as someone who never used to like sex when I had my period. I frequently had cramps. Whatever hormones were at play were at their lowest. I'd get super sensitive to noise and smells. I could be convinced, could get turned on, but it took more on the guy's part to get me in the mood. It was never the blood which as others have mentioned was a matter of putting down a towel. Guys I've known similarly were either fine with sex when I had my period or would prefer to wait. That was never a problem, only a preference.

Disgust is another thing altogether. A man who's disgusted by my body? No way! Nor have I ever been disgusted by own body. Period blood should be disposed of properly, nothing worse. In the garbage, it's as disgusting as any other bodily waste. Shit (noun) is disgusting. People who have normal digestive systems which by necessity shit (verb) are not disgusting. Similarly, period blood can be disgusting, but people who menstruate are not disgusting.

This is why I wonder about the woman who wrote originally. She's not just saying that she has a preference. She says she's disgusted by her own body and by others' bodies. I don't get that.
27
@26: She isn't just disgusted by her own and others' bodies; she thinks this is a political issue--that feminism is a corrupting and degenerate force. She sees pieces that write about period-positive sex as being tools of the left wing. She thinks women are prone to infection and that they are unhealthy when they're menstruating. She has theories about health that sound absolutely medieval. She's angry at what she sees as liberal propaganda and sexual and moral degeneracy.

In short, a crazy woman.
28
I think my period is gross, the actual menstruation material itself and not the people experiencing the periods or the general concept. If it was simple flowing bright red blood directly from uterus to outside world, with the color and texture of blood from a knife cut, then it would be different. But its journey isn't immediate from inside to outside, it's often textured with clots and clumps and stringy bits, and it is dark and varied in color and it squicks me out. Add in the rest of the physical pain and discomfort and I'll usually say no thanks to sex a couple days a month.
29
BiDanFan @16 -- You misunderstand me. I have nothing against those who don't WANT to have sex during their periods. The "crazies" I speak of are those who would like to dictate to everyone that it should be forbidden.
30
27- Nocute-- Yeah, after I posted, I went and looked at the link. It would be hard to list the amount of wrongheaded and crazy she exhibits, and were I to argue with her, I'd need a list to go point by point showing how each one is wrong. One thing I'd say is that it isn't mainly feminists saying there's nothing wrong with sex during a period, it's gynecologists. It does make me wonder Medieval attitudes towards menstruation were.
31
I would like to point out that the Torah and Talmud rules about sex during one's period refer to ritual impurity, i.e. things one can do in the temple. There are many rules regarding ritual cleanliness for both men and women, but they are rather moot since the destruction of the second temple. No temple = no rituals. http://www.jewfaq.org/sex.htm
32
I'm glad to see other woman pointing out that period blood isn't just liquid blood, but stringy, lumpy, etc. I don't think ketchup would be a popular condiment if it had as much mucus in it as period blood.
33
I've done a little (just a very little) reading on sex during menstrual periods. The questionable sites that come from some sort of religious standpoint talk about increased risk of infection. The sites written by doctors mention the need to use a condom during a woman's period because the risk of infection is the same as it is otherwise. The risk of infection seems to come from tampons and pads left in place too long without being changed. That makes sense to me given that warm biological material is a good environment for bacteria to grow. I saw something telling women to make sure the tampon is removed before intercourse, not to forget that a tampon is in place, and to change tampons every several hours even if the flow isn't heavy.

I post this the link Tachycardia gave on Jewish purity laws says that women who have intercourse during their periods are at increased risk for vaginal infections and cervical cancer. Not that anyone should be getting medical advice from religious websites anyway, but that struck me as particularly egregious misinformation. (Unless someone can point me to better information. Like I said, I did just a little reading.) (While I'm talking about misinformation, that site is one interpretation of traditional Jewish law and Jewish attitudes. There are many Jewish communities that take a far more negative and controlling view of women's sexuality.) (And, I suppose, a far more positive one too. There's a lot of variety out there, and I'm not arguing religion here.)

The other thing I found in my cursory reading about sex during periods is how many begin with the idea that it's gross. They start with the unquestioned assumption that women are disgusted and branch out from there to how women are the ones who won't subject men to their horrible selves when menstruating or how it's not really that bad and so on. While some sites eventually get around to just having sex in the shower or putting a towel down so you don't get the sheets messy, they start with the idea that no one would want to do that in the first place.
34
@19 it sounds like your body is uncomfortable on your period, which causes you to not want to have sex... so kind of true?

Obviously not how they meant it, but my initial thought when you were describing all that was, "daamn, that DOES sound uncomfortable."
35
Copied from the reference @31

Jewish Law on Sex (note that this was written hundreds of years ago. Pretty progressive!)

Sex is the woman's right, not the man's. A man has a duty to give his wife sex regularly and to ensure that sex is pleasurable for her. He is also obligated to watch for signs that his wife wants sex, and to offer it to her without her asking for it. The woman's right to sexual intercourse is referred to as onah, and it is one of a wife's three basic rights (the others are food and clothing), which a husband may not reduce. The Talmud specifies both the quantity and quality of sex that a man must give his wife. It specifies the frequency of sexual obligation based on the husband's occupation, although this obligation can be modified in the ketubah (marriage contract). A man may not take a vow to abstain from sex for an extended period of time, and may not take a journey for an extended period of time, because that would deprive his wife of sexual relations. In addition, a husband's consistent refusal to engage in sexual relations is grounds for compelling a man to divorce his wife.
36
Fichu @33, I agree that people shouldn't be getting health advice from religious websites. I posted the link because the crazy lady on Twitter brought up Torah prohibition, and I wanted to show that only a small fraction of even Jewish people adhere to that, as well as support my assertion that it is a ritual matter, not that it starts from a place of thinking the female body is dirty or gross. The article does state that most people outside of the Orthodox community don't even know the laws of niddah. Yes, this is the most strict interpretation of Torah, and it is still sex positive and sees sex as a good thing, with physical benefits of taking a break from sex only incidental (whether they are accurate or not.) It irritates me when random people on the internet cherry pick stuff from religions they haven't done even cursory research about to support their distorted views and attempts to tell others what they should do. Which brings me to the fact that any mitzvah is binding only on Jews, who (according to Jewish theology) accepted them as part of the covenant at Sinai. The Torah was never intended to apply to everyone in the entire world, only to people who take it on willingly. Even if the woman was 100% correct and the Torah prohibitions were completely controlling and sex negative and anything bad you can think of, her bringing it up is irrelevant to her argument.
37
36-- I wholeheartedly agree with you about people cherry picking stuff when they haven't done even basic research. That includes people who learn a little about science or evolution, use them to support their pre-determined conclusions, and basically misrepresent the whole thing. There are people on the Left who jump to wrong conclusions about practices on the Right, and there are folks on the Right who tell scary stories about abuses on the Left.

My point is that that article is Modern Orthodox. It's hardly the strictest interpretation of Torah Law by a long shot. There are sects that take that sex-positive message you quote and use it to conclude that men should take their wive's underwear to their (obviously male) rabbis so the strange men can make a ruling on whether or not it's safe for the couple to have sex again after menstruation. We can talk all we want about how the rules concerning sex and menstruation are about ritual purity, but in practice for a tremendous number of women, it comes down to shame, shame, shame, a little filth, more shame, a great deal of non-knowledge, self-disgust, blame, and shame. There are sections of New York that are so repressive that if we heard about what was going on there in a foreign country, we'd be going to war to rescue the women.

There are lots of articles. This is one of the first that came up when I searched.
https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/25/magaz…
38
A girl learns pretty early that this part of being a woman is to be hidden. That is a bizarre story Fichu, re the underwear and the Rabbi. Gross.
39
Lava-- You make it sound like it's one pair of underwear and one rabbi.
https://www.richarddawkins.net/2016/11/i…
40
No, I was just making the story singular. I gathered there were many many of these check the panties get togethers. The poor Rabbi would have scant time for much else. How controlling and the hide of those men.
Your article reference @37 is frightening. These poor women, nothing more than baby making slaves. Make sure the female never finds her pleasure, she's easier to control then.
41
And what's the point of teaching them how to find their desire if they go back home and never feel it for their chosen husbands.
42
Cory @29: Well, "I don't understand the crazies who think menstruation = no sex" certainly did not come across as ambiguous. Clarification appreciated.
43
Dan, how could you leave Rachel Lark's "Warm, Bloody, and Tender" out of this conversation?!

You were in the music video for pete's sake: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=IGx4OLuE_x…

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