How long after a divorce does someone become “emotionally available” for a new relationship?

Someone who initiated a divorce—someone who made up their mind, got a lawyer, and filed the paperwork—is probably going to be “emotionally available” a little sooner than someone who was blindsided when their spouse “asked” for a divorce. (It’s not really an “ask,” since you don’t need someone’s permission to divorce them.) But if the person who initiated the divorce was being abused, they may need more time to recover from the marriage than the “blindsided” abuser they left. And if a marriage wound down after a decade or two and the decision to divorce was mutual and amicable, both parties could be “emotionally available” before they’ve taken their rings off, much less finalized the divorce.


Is being a “vaginaphile” an acceptable thing in 2023? Regardless of the other person’s identity?


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