FEY AIN'T GAY

EDITORS: The new gossip fella, Adrian Ryan, used the word "fey" to describe Kevin Spacey [It's All True, April 13] -- "fey" as in really gay-seeming. Fuck! Why does everybody toss out this frickin' word, and nobody ever, ever bothers to look it up? I've kept quiet to The New York Times, Newsweek, the Village Voice, and even the New Yorker, for chrissake. But not you, too! Fey has not one gawldang thang to do with queers, and never has, other than its lispy sound and the fact that it rhymes with "gay." What it means is "having a premonition of your own death." A secondary meaning is "being under a spell" -- unless the dictionary folks finally just gave up from sheer exhaustion and said, "Okay. It can mean faggot, too." Look it up, dumbass.

Anonymous Pedantic Arshole [sic], via e-mail

STRANGER COPY EDITOR MELODY MOSS RESPONDS: The American Heritage Dictionary, Third Ed. (used by copy editors nationwide) gives the following first definition of "fey": "Having or displaying an otherworldly, magical, or fairylike aspect or quality: 'She's got that fey look as though she's had breakfast with a leprechaun' (Dorothy Burnham)." This usage of "fey" is a variant of "fay" (of Middle English origin), meaning "a fairy or an elf." The secondary meaning of "fey" (of Scottish origin) is "fated to die soon." Look it up, "Arshole."


ARMY, NAVY, AIRFORCE, MARINES: PROUDLY THINNING THE HERD

DEAR STRANGER: After reading your article, "Military Zone" [Pat Kearney, April 20], I'm confused as to why you object to the military recruiting [in] high schools. I came from a military family, and high school recruiting was a normal thing. The local bases would even put on a demonstration for the students. Your article is unclear [about] what exactly you object to about school recruiting. Is it that it is done on the taxpayer's dollar? Or that they are targeting a young and impressionable audience? Or just that it's an institution you disagree with?

If it's the target audience, then why were the teachers impressed and motivated positively toward the military? If our children are so vapid and naive that they can't recognize slick marketing and the bait 'n' switch routine recruiters offer, then can we say it's a bad thing that these people are entering a dangerous profession? Personally, I think that anyone dumb enough to believe what a 30-second commercial tells them needs to be removed from the gene pool.

A. Armstrong, Seattle


GUN NUT DEPENDS ON STRANGER

DEAR EDITORS: Congratulations to Pat Kearney on a well-written article ["Military Zone"]. I think, however, that Pat should re-read 1984 and the studies in the '60s on subliminal advertisements. The Ministry of Information has no interest in telling you what is good for you, only what is good for Big Brother. That is why we must depend on The Stranger for news. Jump-cut images in TV advertisements get into our memories without us being able to screen them out. "THEY" do not want critical thinkers coming out of high school; "THEY" want trained killer-robots to send out into the world to enforce THEIR agenda. By the way, I am an American who supports the right of citizens to keep and bear arms as well as an advocate of a strong, reliable, cutting-edge military.

Edward Friendly, Issaquah, WA


LIGHT RAIL FUNDING: PROBLEM SOLVED!

EDITOR: There is a quick way to obtain funds for extension of the light rail link to Northgate from the University of Washington ["Mystery Train," Josh Feit, April 20]: Simply don't build the downtown tunnel section. Instead have a light rail going from the Convention Center to Northgate, and a second rail going from Columbia Station to South King County. In effect, there would be a north rail line, and another south line. Passengers would simply transfer from the trains to all-electric buses. Presto: There is the capital to extend the rail line to Northgate. Better yet, it would permit the bus tunnel to continue operating during construction of the light rail. Eventually, the two rail lines would be joined, either by building tracks in the existing bus tunnel or by drilling two additional tunnels underneath (it can be done). Electric power lines would be extended down the existing bus-only street, thus permitting quick travel.

Martin Nix, Seattle


MARINER PENISES ARE NICE, BUT ARE THEY NEWSWORTHY?

JENNIFER VOGEL: What exactly is the newsworthiness of Mariner penises? ["Take Me out to the Ballpark," Art Spiel, April 13] I have supported your newspaper since it was a four-page handout. While the stories are often on the edge, they typically have meaning and are worthy of the reader's attention. I thought that until I saw The Stranger's attack on the Seattle Mariners. It's not funny. I hope the Mariners sue The Stranger for that story. I find it to be distasteful and malicious. Did the Mariners shun your newspaper in some way? What did Gil Meche, John Olerud, Jay Buhner, Edgar Martinez, David Bell, Freddy Garcia, Mark McLemore, and Alex Rodriguez do to prompt such an attack? Many of these players support the same community causes that many of your readers do. Have you no professional ethics?

Seattle Sailor, a sports fan and former Stranger reader, via e-mail


MARIA CANTWELL: WHY, SHE'S A BIG, DUMB DOPE

EDITORS: Not only does Maria Cantwell not "read the fucking Stranger," but she can't even get endorsements from her home legislative districts ["Personality Crisis," Allie Holly-Gottlieb, April 20]. About two months ago, the 44th Legislative District -- which Cantwell represented in Olympia from '86 to '92 -- voted unanimously to solely endorse Commissioner Deborah Senn. Then, on Tuesday April 18, the 21st district (where Cantwell presently lives) came out with a dual endorsement for both Maria and the Commish. This, after the Cantwell campaign packed the house with supporters, pushing for a single endorsement! Alas, the grand majority of the "new faces" at the meeting couldn't vote for Cantwell, since they hadn't paid their LD dues. And guess what? NEITHER HAD MARIA HERSELF.

Jennifer Keeley, via e-mail


WILSON ALSO DROPS NAMES

EDITORS: In what I think was supposed to be a review of Mark Lindquist's new novel, Never Mind Nirvana, Kathleen Wilson showed us all again what a hypocrite she is ["Never Mind Fiction," April 20]. She puts down Lindquist's book, saying it is "the most name droppingest book" to hit the stands. Um, isn't that all Kathleen Wilson does? It's My Party: What the hell is that? All that column has ever been is a bigger opportunity for her to drop names.

I haven't read the book yet, but from what I understand, it is a book about the local music scene. It would only be logical for him to reference local artists in the book. At least the book drops names for a story.

Lee Richards, via e-mail


HE JUMPED, HE LIVED

DEAR EDITOR: "Fuck you" was the tattoo I got after I jumped off the Aurora Bridge. I found Charles Mudede's article to be a most accurate and entertaining article on the subject of jumping ["Jumpers," April 13]. I rode my bike across the bridge one night and thought, while in a drunken state, that it would be fun to do a cannonball off of the Aurora. I thought everyone would be impressed with my tale. It was a fun jump and a nice ambulance ride, too. Now I have a 12-inch scar on my back and two metal rods that hold me together, like a human shish kebab.

I did not know the history of the bridge, but I learned it well during my stay in the hospital. I spoke to several psychiatrists. They determined that my knowledge of physics and the amount of tequila I drank made me eligible for a Darwin Award, but not for a stay in the psych ward. I have lived in Seattle for the past six years. I think that all new people moving to Seattle should jump off the Aurora Bridge. That way, we get a heartier, stronger group of transplants -- if they live like I did.

Caleb Schaber, via e-mail

DEPARTMENT OF CORRECTIONS: On November 11, 1999, The Stranger ran an article characterizing Dick Brass and others who donated to Safe Streets and Parks as "Seattle's Top Richest Fascists" for purchasing ads promoting candidates supporting Mark Sidran's policies. The article also included the supporters' addresses and the following statement: "We suggest that anti-corporate revolutionary types in town for the WTO cut and save this list."

The Stranger retracts and apologizes for its stupid characterization of these people as "fascists." We wish no physical harm to these folks, and disavow any inference in the article to the contrary.