Were you one of those girls with an adolescent fixation on unicorns? "I never had My Pretty Pony. I was into Strawberry Shortcake, not so much unicorns. Though I did ride horses for a couple of years."

Was there a budding sexual thrill to that? "To riding horses? Maybe subconsciously. I mucked out the stalls, too--I don't know how that could be sexual."

I've known several women who've told me that riding horses was all about the pressure of the animal between their legs. "Well, it's really painful after you ride horses. It wasn't a sexual thing for me."

Why do girls like My Pretty Pony? "I think it's because they were so colorful. And horses are truly beautiful to watch. I watched The Man from Snowy River the other day--"

That's a great movie! "When I was a little it was a great movie. I watched it the other day and it's a big cheesefest. The bad horse gives the lead character the evil eye with all this scary music. I watched it with my boyfriend and there's the whole scene where the lead actor rides his horse off the cliff at the end--I do think it's sexier watching men ride horses. He's riding down this steep, steep cliff--apparently they trained this horse for years to do this--but basically, his back is touching the ass of this horse and I just thought it was so beautiful, and my boyfriend couldn't figure out what was so beautiful about it."

What did he think? "It was like sport to him. Whereas I saw it as some raw... okay, I guess I lied earlier--it is sexual."

Are unicorns the most Freudian mythical creatures or what? "Oh, come on! Puhlease! Of course they are!"

Scientists have bred a goat with a single horn--would you want one as a pet? "Hmmm. I have a really small apartment and I don't know how I could clean up goat shit every day."