While attending the wildly popular salon Naked Girls Reading last spring, half of my brain followed the pleasant lilt of bare-breasted ladies reading Jeanette Winterson and Douglas Adams, while the other half wondered whether male parts might someday dangle on those same red leather couches. And, if so, what would their owners read?
Sunday's Naked Boys Reading (a onetime affair presented by the Seattle chapter of the Chicago-based NGR franchise) featured the vocal and physical talents of four exceedingly comfortable men reading from favorite female authors. Monk (of the bondage business Twisted Monk), Clayton Hibbert (of Seattle Erotic Art Festival), Jean du Jour (of former boylesque troupe GAZM), and Waxie Moon (dancer and boylesque performer) dropped their silk robes to amused but appreciative laughter—as the men took their seats, penises bounced slightly. They took turns reading in 15-minute segments, and Monk (in high black Fluevog boots and a leatherman's harness) began with Ayn Rand, pointing out that while her most famous works glorifying the individual are over 1,000 pages, the comparatively thin Anthem is really all you need. Waxie (in pearls and earrings) chose two juicy selections from Judy Blume's Wifey, his slightly cold-ravaged voice adding appropriate huskiness to the passages he'd circled as a sixth grader. Rakish in unlaced hiking boots and sport socks, du Jour read life lessons from The Male Escort's Handbook: Your Guide to Getting Rich the Hard Way. Soft-spoken Hibbert was the most romantic with selections lovingly chosen from The Time Traveler's Wife.
The naked boys took their assignments seriously, reading well-rehearsed passages in a heartfelt, unself-conscious way and nodding to each other in bro-like approval, taking the time to slightly throw voices for female parts or customize poses to material (a conspiratorial crouch, legs spread at a provocative line). There was no shyness, no demure hiding. Waxie sipped tea, legs tucked beneath him, earnestly listening to Monk read from The Ethical Slut. Hibbert fanned himself, politely applauding du Jour's recitation of a female masturbation scene. It could have been a studious reading at a public library—but everyone was much better dressed.
Naked Girls Reading's next monthly salon is November 7 at Odd Fellows West Hall. Sadly, there are no plans for another male reading.