At the Hummingbird Saloon, I learned that the word "pasty" can be two drastically different items, depending on one's pronunciation. "A pasty [the one with a long "a," pronounced "pay-stee"] is actually a nipple covering," co-owner Lenore Sharp explained. The new Columbia City bar from the owners of Full Tilt Ice Cream contains nothing designed as nipple coverings, though there are several snazzy pinball machines a topless person could crouch behind if necessary.

The Hummingbird specializes in savory Welsh pasties, pronounced "past-ee." The little pies are a favorite in the family of Lenore's husband, and Hummingbird co-owner, Ken. They were traditionally miner's lunches, but here you don't have to risk being buried alive to enjoy one—the greatest danger at the Hummingbird is getting your ass kicked at shuffleboard or the bar's giant novelty chess game. The aptly named vegetarian "butter pie" I sampled was stuffed with baked carrots and rutabagas, which are like deluxe turnips, and garnished with apple slices and pepperoncini. The cook's suggested paring was a shot of Midnight Moonshine, which was like smooth vodka with no aftertaste but a pleasant vaporous burning. As a Full Tilt annex, the Hummingbird offers a scoop of ice cream on their desserts (currently apple pie and bread pudding). Or you can take a pint home to put on anything you want.