WEDNESDAY 4/18

CANDY BASKET COMEDY SHOWCASE

Check out Seattle's funniest diabetics as they throw jokes (and a giant novelty candy basket) at the crippling all-American disease at Breezy Mist Productions' monthly Candy Basket Comedy Showcase—this month features the local joke-making talents of Emmett Montgomery, $3 Manny's, and half-price bottles of wine. Laughter may not cure high blood pressure, kidney failure, blindness, or amputation, but it can beat the shit out of a bad case of the hiccups and old reruns of Monk streaming free on Hulu. So go laugh your ass or half a leg off. Capitol Club, 8 pm, free, 21+.

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LAFF HOLE FEATURING JAMES ADOMIAN

The internet tells me that James Adomian is a hilarious "daredevil dancing queen," which I think refers to Adomian's admitted homosexuality and his penchant for dressing in drag as George W. Bush. (A fantasy of mine. Another involves seeing Dubya compete on Dancing with the Stars.) If this is true and Adomian's set features a Bush cameo, I just might pee myself. But the internet also tells me that Osama bin Laden has started his own lawn-mowing business in Idaho (Infidel Lawn and Maintenance™) and that President Barack Obama and President Robert Mugabe are the same person. So, you know, grain of salt. Chop Suey, 8:30 pm, $10 adv/$15 DOS, 21+.