I really should have gotten the toaster oven by now, because I've converted an awful lot of people to kink--at least for a night. You could argue that getting intimate with me presupposes perverted inclinations, but even back when I was picking up strangers in vanilla bars, no one ever jumped out of bed when I pulled out the handcuffs.
Men, of course, are almost too easy. Once I was discussing a presumably vanilla man I found attractive with my partner, Max. Max was skeptical about this guy's willingness to enter the dungeon, so to speak. "Darlin'," I said, "if a sexy woman says to a man, 'You know, I'd like to fuck you--but only if you let me tie you up,' he'll show up on her doorstep with a spool of rope from Home Depot. Trust me." And that kind of eagerness has its charms.
I've done well with not-officially-kinky women, too. The trick is to slide into it sideways. If you declare your intentions--say, to spank her while you fuck her--beforehand, she'll get nervous and back up. But if you just start slowly weaving it into the mix, talking sweetly dirty to her all the time about how hot she's making you, my experience is that she'll arch her back and hold her ass right up for you.
You are apt to have to deal with some morning-after angst, though. Guys who were your submissive sex toy the night before start overcompensating with macho attitude in the cold light of day. And I once had a woman--who had been wet to her knees when I finished roughing her up--tell me she could never see me again. She felt guilty, she said, for having enjoyed BDSM when people in Third World countries were being nonconsensually tortured. I swear that's what she said. I asked her if it was wrong for her to enjoy consensual vanilla sex, since people were being raped within her own zip code. Then I gathered up my sticky clothespins and my paddle and left.
So I tell myself I should just do my hunting among other deeply dyed perverts. And then I'll meet someone who's never tried BDSM, but I can just feel the kinkiness there, simmering, waiting to be unleashed. Oh, it just tugs at me. When Oscar Wilde said, "I can resist anything but temptation," he must have been thinking of me.
