Maydir. Lucky McKee

Opens Fri June 13 at the Meridian.

Directed by Lucky McKee, May is a horror film about a youngish and unattractive woman who lives in an equally unattractive apartment building. Her name is May, she has one eye, and she had a very strange childhood--on her seventh or so birthday, May's freaky mom gave her a creepy doll. Like dolls in all horror films, May's gift is pale, homemade, Victorian, and imprisoned in a glass box. The creepy doll was to be the friend that May's school and neighborhood failed to provide.

The movie leaps ahead to May's adulthood, and the doll has not been replaced by a real person; it's still her best friend. May talks to the doll, asks it for advice on very personal matters, but the doll never says a word. It has dead eyes that stare into the nothingness of May's life. May does have a job; not a normal job, of course, but a strange one: She is the assistant to an overweight veterinarian who has a thick Mediterranean accent that only May can decipher. You guessed it! May is at home in this clinic filled with sick, wounded, and dying domestic animals.

May wants love. She wants to be loved. One day she sees some curly-haired guy smoking a cigarette during his lunch break and falls in love with his hands. May could never do something as normal as desiring a man because he is handsome or has a winning personality--she is too unusual for that; she can only fall for weird things like hands, necks, bellybuttons. May pursues the man (or his hands), they have a brief affair, she gets dumped. May then has a lesbian affair with a coworker, who is fascinated by her strangeness. But the coworker turns out to be unfaithful. As you and I and any other person who makes it to the last quarter of this unfortunate film (poorly photographed, acted, edited, and directed) might expect, the worst starts to happen. Besieged by loneliness, deceit, and humiliation, May's mind begins to collapse: She kills a cat, then a transient punk, then the ones she loves and hates. And that is basically the whole film.

As the Bible tells us, King Solomon had a ring on his finger that had an inscription which, if read, would make him happy when he was sad and sad when he was happy. The inscription read, "And this, too, shall pass." If I had that ring while watching May, it would have certainly made me happy.

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