Some of my best ideas come while I'm at the urinal—there's something to be said for piss-stream of consciousness.
JAN 31, 11:15 PM
What the Egyptian people need now, more than ever, is a heavy dose of chillwave.
FEB 1, 4:58 PM
DeVotchKa, I am your mortal enemy.
FEB 2, 11:19 am
If urination were an Olympic sport, I'd be showered with gold medals.
FEB 3, 8:46 am
If you say you have "the gift of gab," you should probably return it for a refund.
FEB 3, 3:04 PM
Snuff out the urge to relate your dreams to others.
FEB 4, 10:12 am
When's the last time you talked about Foghat?
FEB 4, 7:24 PM
Why do you never hear free jazz blasting out of motor vehicles?
FEB 4, 7:28 PM
Reading the phrase "paradigm shift" always makes me exceptionally horny.
FEB 5, 3:36 PM
Dick Hyman's "The Minotaur" alone justifies the existence of the Moog synthesizer.
FEB 5, 7:59 PM
A grown-ass man wearing shorts in the Seattle winter broadcasts that he's quite all right with celibacy.
FEB 6, 12:20 PM
Who is Michael Gira's favorite comedian?
FEB 6, 8:44 PM
Transitioned from Swans' Soundtracks for the Blind to J. J. Cale's Troubadour. JARRING.
FEB 6, 9:12 PM
There was a weekend in the early '80s when I was certain that Shoes were the best band in the world.
FEB 8, 11:03 PM
Want to thank the Strokes for continuing to make it easy for me not to care about them.
FEB 9, 10:00 PM
Rumor has it that some people don't think virtuoso jazz musicians flamboyantly playing funk is the best thing in the universe.
FEB 10, 1:45 am
You sure got a lot less interesting since I stopped drinking.
FEB 13, 2:58 AM
I'd watch the Grammys if it just consisted of everyone in the room doing mountains of coke and fucking one another.
FEB 13, 6:58 PM
Follow Dave Segal's tweets at twitter.com/editaurus.