Dear Science,

In these slow economic times, everyone is looking for ways to save and ways to make a little extra scratch. I thought I would see if you might be able to answer a question for me.

I have undiagnosed impulse control disorder, and I pluck various hairs on my body when bored or stressed. I have become an expert hair plucker. I can pluck a hair from any part of my body, and it will come out with a perfect follicle intact. I can pluck hairs from infected glands, and extract and remove ingrown hairs, single follicles with multiple roots (as opposed to split hairs), even the occasional follicle with a very good blood supply where the removal causes bleeding.

I want to put this well-honed skill to good use.

Is there some sort of hair or dermatology lab that would be interested in my hairs? Would school-laboratory supply stores be interested? I could mount and preserve them in slides if necessary.

And, yes, I know this is gross.

Plucked Hard And Put Away Wet

Good for you: Hair follicles are fucking amazing. Bad for you: You get no more of them after birth. Those you've already plucked out aren't coming back.

That little plug of tissue at the base of each and every hair on your body contains the skin stem cell, specialized cells that give rise to new hair as well as new skin. For hair production there is a regimented cycle—with a time of growth, slowing down, and resting. In the most common forms of baldness, the hair follicles stick around but spend more time resting than growing.

Scores of labs are trying to cure baldness. The existing drugs—minoxidil (Rogaine) and finasteride (Propecia)—are somewhat crappy at the task. Minoxidil's hair-saving power was discovered by accident; the drug started as a nearly useless blood-pressure medication. Patients in the early trials noticed more hair on their heads. How? We still have no clue. Finasteride works by blocking the conversion of the male sex hormone testosterone to its more potent cousin DHT. DHT shuts down hair follicles (again, nobody really understands why), so blocking the generation of DHT from testosterone seems to keep a few more follicles active. DHT also enlarges prostates and is responsible for penis growth during puberty. Just saying.

When Dr. Elaine Fuchs discovered the skin stem cell a few years ago, she was flooded with calls from desperate men seeking the luscious crop of hair found in their youth. I doubt she—or other scientists working on hair follicles—would find your skill too useful. SSRI drugs, however, can do a splendid job on obsessive-compulsive behaviors. Else, see if your local waxing shop is harried with business.

Disgustingly Yours,

Science

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