While everyone in Seattle was watching bands at the Capitol Hill Block Party, I was watching my 65-year-old aunt Roach perform a live set on the front porch of a deer camp, out in the woods in Nowheresville, Northern Michigan. Songs ranged from "Bubble Butt" by Major Lazer to "Born This Way" by Lady Gaga. Aunt Roach is available for your party, wedding reception, and/or bat mitzvah. Her tour rider includes a bag of ice, half a dozen lemons, and one Mason jar. She'll bring her own jug o' 'shine.