I'm not one to start throwing stones around my glass house—I mean, damn, I've definitely put some weird shit in my mouth when I was drunk. Like the time I ate a teaspoonful of capsicum extract, or the time I ate 14—count 'em, 14—Krystal burgers in Atlanta, Georgia. But these two, Evan and Libby, they're ingesting something even I wouldn't touch. They're drinking the remains of a pornographic photo-booth picture that lived in Dan Savage's sweaty underwear before being ground up in a blender with a warm bottle of beer and an Odwalla Strawberry C Monster. That's some Fear Factor–grade madness.

Libby says, "Essentially, I drank Savage's balls, my lost ambition, and some broken dreams." To watch more ball drinking at The Stranger's 11th Annual Valentine's Day Bash, go to