Our country revolves around sexiness, and traditionally we look to musicians to provide the yardstick by which that horndog je ne sais quoi is measured. But how do comic/zine writers, with their equally DIY ethic, measure up to musicians on the crotch-rocking scale?
Armed with that question, I set out to justify the positioning of this piece under the rubric of "Aphrodisiacs" by interrogating some of the comic artists and zinesters participating in Bumbershoot's Ink Spot program.
My first subject was Jim Goad, and when queried as to what he would be doing on stage from 12:30 to 1 pm on Sunday, the contentious editor of Answer Me! and author of the books The Redneck Manifesto and Shit Magnet replied, "I'll be reading choice selections from Notes from Undergoad. I will also be speaking, singing, and saying unfair things about Seattle and the word 'Bumbershoot.'" And, Mr. Goad, just why is it that writers are sexier than musicians? "The same reason that mongoloids are sexier than musicians--because they're smarter." Yeee-ouch!
Next I spoke with Ink Spot MC Chris Estey, a Seattle zine mainstay for many years, and the editor of such publications as Ghetto Chicken and Bandoppler. I asked Chris about the relevancy of zines as a means of communication. "Zines are important because they transcend the arbitrary standards of mainstream 'acceptability' and 'authenticity,' in literary quality, appearance, et cetera," Estey explained. Awesome, but why are writers sexier than musicians? "Writers age better, usually--as Leonard Cohen once sorta said in his novel Beautiful Losers, 'All this sitting on my ass has been great for my face.'" I wish I had sorta said that.
Davey Oil is a local mini-comics artist, and the driving force behind the Slide Rule, a troupe of local cartoonists who will be performing on the main literary stage in the Alki Room at 3:15 pm on Sunday. I wondered what it was all about, and Oil told me. "The Slide Rule comes from an urgent need to get cartoonists out of their apartments. Cartoonists deserve some of the attention, praise, and play that live performers get, and slide shows are our live-reading media." And, Mr. Oil, why are cartoonists sexier than musicians? "Well, Brad, cartoonists are far sexier than musicians because we spend more time alone 'perfecting our technique.'" I expected him to punctuate that last phrase with the word "baby," but he didn't.
So there you have it. Perhaps we should re-check that score: I hereby declare all writers, cartoonists, and by extension you, the reading public, and myself, the biggest aphrodisiacs around! Thank you!
