I, anonymous, recently got screwed over by some asshole pigs and the management of a certain hotel downtown with a big green sign. After my senior prom, my boyfriend, my best friend, and I were maxin' out, gettin' schwilly in our hotel room. We kept to ourselves, and watched Saturday Night Live instead of attending the wild parties elsewhere in the building. Three-quarters of a bottle of Cuervo later, my friend and I went downstairs to get some ice. Unbeknownst to us, we stumbled across a vacated party room guarded by pigs.

One particularly fat pig immediately assumed that since we were teenagers, we were out to do evil, and demanded to search our room. He and his cohorts tromped in, woke my boyfriend, and wouldn't even allow him his pants while they poured out my alcohol, flushed my (quite harmless) weed, and took away the pretty glass pipe I got for Christmas. They tore apart all our belongings without permission, and then the manager told them to throw us out.

As we stood on the cold street, with all our stuff (including two large prom dresses), we pondered what the hell went wrong. We could see the other kids who go to my school through one of the windows whooping it up, and asked, "Aren't cops supposed to help the good kids?" We weren't bothering anyone. We were trying to enjoy our prom night in a traditional, yet safe and harmless manner. We had nothing but respect for the establishment and their guests, and yet they threw us out. Thanks, SPD, for ruining my prom.