Every summer, every single animal welfare organization from here to Outer Mongolia warns people not to lock their pets in their cars. DON'T YOU LISTEN?!? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? Those two dogs that you carried down to the edge of Green Lake on Saturday evening to try to cool down looked more dead than alive. They were so pitiful, lying there like limp noodles and panting so hard you'd have thought their lungs would burst right out of their ribcages. And they don't get that bad after only two minutes, so we all knew you were lying out your ass. You're lucky you didn't drown the one, the way you were pouring water down the poor thing's throat. We were begging you to get them to the emergency vet on Stone Way, and you kept saying, "I think they're getting better" when they hardly had the strength to lift their heads off the ground. Hopefully next time some kind-hearted, responsible soul will break all of your car's windows and take them away from you!

—Anonymous