The week kicks off with a butt-kicking story from Virginia Beach, where tonight a 12-year-old girl conquered a potentially life-threatening obstacle with so much bravery, grace, and wisdom, she should be awarded the Congressional Medal of Honor. The saga began around 8:00 p.m. this evening when the aforementioned young girl found herself in the elevator of the Suburban Lodge motel with a short, dark, middle-aged man. According to The Virginian-Pilot, the man proceeded to unzip his pants and display his privates to the young girl, who wasted no time in grabbing his zipper and yanking it up. While the foiled flasher screamed and bled, the girl tracked down her stepfather, who listened to her tale of horror and heroism then chased after the profusely bleeding pervert. The two men fought in front of the motel, but the flasher broke free and escaped. Virginia Beach police are continuing their search for the man, who faces a felony charge of taking indecent liberties with a minor. As to the status of his genitals, news reports describe the man only as "injured," but cheer up: Police say he suffered enough blood loss to require medical attention, and are searching area hospitals to bust his ass. As for the 12-year-old girl, I predict she'll be America's first female president.
··Virginia's not the only state riddled with sickos: Today in Washington's own Federal Way, police arrested 34-year-old Jason Cox, holding him on $750,000 cash-only bail after accusing him of having sex with a 13-year-old Texas girl he lured here over the Internet. The Seattle Times reports that Jason Cox has been charged with a whole mess of felonies following the discovery of his long-distance "sexual grooming" and eventual close-distance sexual relationship with a 13-year-old girl from Katy, Texas. Court documents say that Cox communicated with the girl over the Internet for several weeks, sending the eighth grader explicit photos of underage girls having sex with older men, persuading her to send naked photos of herself, and eventually sending her a bus ticket so she could travel to Federal Way to consummate their sweet, sweet love. The girl arrived in Washington on March 27, but after five days in Jason Cox's pervy love nest, she phoned the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (keep that number handy, kids), saying she was in Federal Way and wished to return home to Texas. The agency contacted the police, the police arrested Cox, and King County Superior Court charged Cox with two counts of second-degree rape of a child, luring a child with sexual motivation, sexual exploitation of a minor, and possession of child pornography.
TUESDAY, APRIL 2
Speaking of crimes to make your skin crawl: Today Reuters dished up a puke-worthy story par excellence with its report on John Crutchley, the 55-year-old Florida man who first made headlines in 1985 when he pled guilty to kidnapping a 19-year-old hitchhiker, raping her repeatedly before tying her to a chair, then draining her blood into a jar and drinking it. The story gets better: Despite the loss of nearly half her blood, the naked, handcuffed hitchhiker managed to escape through a bathroom window, and the vampire rapist was soon caught, convicted of kidnapping and sexual battery, and sentenced to 25 years in jail. After serving only 10 years of his sentence, Crutchley was released to an Orlando halfway house in 1996, but was sent back to prison the next day after a drug test revealed he had smoked pot, for which Crutchley--who admitted to smoking the weed at a going-away party in prison the night before his release--received a mandatory life sentence for parole violation. Today the saga of the Vampire Rapist came to a fittingly twisted close, as officials at the Hardee Correctional Institute in central Florida announced that John Crutchley was found dead in his cell, after successfully committing suicide-by-asphyxiation by placing a plastic bag over his head.
WEDNESDAY, APRIL 3
"I thought she was hot." So says Vili Fualaau--the former lover/current rape victim of Mary Kay Letourneau--who today began a civil suit in King County Superior Court against the Des Moines police department and the Highline School District for not doing more to protect him from his hot 'n' horny sixth-grade teacher, with whom he fathered two children. The Seattle Times reports that Fualaau and his mother, Soona, are seeking $1 million in damages from police and school officials for failing to shield the then 12-year-old Fualaau from the advances of his 34-year-old teacher; on the witness stand, the now 18-year-old Fualaau described how Letourneau "encouraged his adolescent curiosity" by telling him what makes a good sex partner, offering to strip for him for every history-test question he got right, and, eventually, putting out for him whenever he wanted. History buffs will remember that prior to today's sob story, Vili Fualaau made a small fortune testifying to the beauty and purity of his and Letourneau's intergenerational love; with the $180,000 garnered from media and book deals now gone, could Fualaau and his mother be rewriting history to suit their financial needs? Lucky for them, it's not up to Last Days to decide. Stay tuned for details.
THURSDAY, APRIL 4
Today Last Days traveled to Utah to visit our beloved Jake's family, whose warm hospitality, genial humor, and generous forbearance in ignoring that weird smoky smell lingering in the upstairs bathroom continue to give Latter-day Saints a good name. One of the highlights of the trip was the time we spent in the Salt Lake City airport, where we had the pleasure of reading 1,001 magazine reports on the 2002 Oscars--or "Showtime at the Apollo," as Tourette's-stricken comedienne Amy Sedaris dished on the Conan O'Brien show. (Sedaris' comment was wisely axed from the network broadcast.) Speaking of Oscar's long-overdue honoring of lead actors o' color, did anyone else notice KOMO's freakishly prescient placement of Steve Pool's head on the Oscar statuette in the station's pre-Oscar broadcast ads? Or were you all too busy gaping in horror at Gwyneth Paltrow's ghastly bosom?
FRIDAY, APRIL 5
Nothing happened today. But on this day in 1887, Annie Sullivan forced Helen Keller to grunt, "Water"; in 1954, Elvis Presley recorded his first single, "That's Alright Mama"; and in 1989, the David Letterman show became the first network TV series to use Dolby stereo. Happy anniversary to all.
SATURDAY, APRIL 6
Nothing happened today.
SUNDAY, APRIL 7
The week closes with the dynamic results of last week's PRO OR CON? contest, in which readers were invited to vote either pro or con on ham plus Halle Berry plus Robin Williams' head on a stick. This proved to be the most divisive of The Stranger's pro or con battles, with many readers' love of Halle Berry and desire for Robin Williams' death clashing with their deep hatred of ham, but in the end, ham, Halle Berry, and Robin Williams' head on a stick won out, garnering 69 "pro" votes to 67 "con" votes. Last Days sends our congratulations to ham and Halle Berry, and our condolences to the family of Robin Williams. Let's never speak of this again.
Thanks, Sean C.! Send Hot Tips to lastdays@thestranger.com.
