MONDAY, FEBRUARY 14 This week of slain entertainers, American uprisings, and an allegedly felonious use of YouTube kicks off with an uncharacteristic and much-needed blast of good news. The source: Seattle University, the private Jesuit institution that today announced its new $1 million a year Youth Initiative, wherein the school's long-standing mentor relationship with nearby Bailey Gatzert Elementary will expand to include the whole Central District. As the Seattle Times' Katherine Long reports, "About 17,500 residents live in the 100-block neighborhood bounded by South Dearborn Street, Alaskan Way, James Street, East Cherry Street, and 23rd Avenue South, and about 35 percent live at or below the poverty line." The Youth Initiative—described by Seattle U president Father Stephen Sundborg as an "ongoing, permanent commitment" to the community—aims to provide needy residents of the Central District with a wealth of services, including more tutoring and after-school help to students of Washington Middle School and Garfield High School, free legal aid for recent immigrants from the SU School of Law, and free health assistance from the SU College of Nursing. (On Wednesday, the Central District's good fortune will expand, as Mayor Mike McGinn announces the neighborhood's inclusion in the Seattle Jobs Plan, the neighborhood-improvement initiative that will invest $1 million in 18 neighborhood businesses in the International District, Rainier Valley, Pioneer Square, Capitol Hill, and the CD.)

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 15 The week continues with a high-drama dance along the border between alleged humor and alleged crime. Our setting: Muskegon, Michigan, where last month 21-year-old Evan Emory approached a local elementary school with his desire to perform for a classroom of students and videotape the event, with the expressed goal of using the video to improve his portfolio and up his chances of getting into a Big Ten school. Aided by a teacher/friend, Emory did videotape himself playing guitar and singing before a group of first graders at Beechnau Elementary, after which the children were dismissed and Emory videotaped himself singing a second song, an aggressively pornographic number he later edited together with the kids' earlier responses, creating the illusion of an adult man singing a filthy song to first graders. Yesterday, Emory posted this edited video on YouTube, and today he was arrested. Details come from the Muskegon Chronicle, which managed to see the allegedly incriminating video prior to YouTube yanking it down and supplies us with these song lyrics and attendant images:

"I want you to suck on my testes until I spurt in your face."

(close-up of girl covering her mouth)

"I'll lick on your chewie."

(close-up of two girls covering their mouths)

"I want to stick my index finger in your anus."

(close-up of boy making a shocked face)

"I'll be the bus riding your ass up and down my town."

(close-up of boy with grossed-out look on his face)

"I'm gonna use my sausage to make fettuccine, then for dessert have a Harry Houdini."

(close-up of girl laughing and rocking)

Tomorrow, Emory will be arraigned on one charge of manufacturing child sexually abusive material, a felony that could earn him 20 years in prison. Defending the severity of the charges, Muskegon County prosecutor Tony Tague told the Chronicle, "The bottom line in this case is that he walked into a classroom and took advantage and victimized every single child in that classroom." Perhaps you're wondering: How is what this guy did different from what happened that time on Wonder Showzen where toddlers were exposed to all types of adult horrors? Having watched several thousand hours of original-recipe Law & Order, Last Days guesses it probably has something to do with consent. Comedically progressive parents who allow their kids to be coached into saying "Work will set you free" on TV are in an entirely different boat than parents who just send their kids to school—an elementary school where an idiotic adult allegedly gained access to them through false pretenses and then showcased this transgression in a sexually provocative video posted online. Evan Emory remains free on a $5,000 bond.

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 16 In much worse news, today brought the literal last day of a beloved local goofball: Robert Stabile, better known as Hokum W. Jeebs, the freelance vaudevillian who founded West Seattle's Hokum Hall and performed all over the region with his crazy piano bicycle contraptions until early this morning, when the 60-year-old Stabile was fatally stabbed in his West Seattle home. "Police say Stabile's domestic partner—a woman police initially identified as his wife—heard Stabile yelling in pain and he ran into their bedroom saying he'd been stabbed in the chest," reports, identifying the suspected attacker as a 19-year-old transient who'll be taken into custody tonight.

••Speaking of ridiculous tragedies: Today, the Guardian published its tell-all interview with Rafid Ahmed Alwan al-Janabi, the former Iraqi chemical engineer whose testimony about Saddam Hussein's production of biological weapons became one of the Bush administration's primary justifications for the war in Iraq. Unfortunately, as Janabi is happy enough to reveal, the testimony was nothing but lies. "I had the chance to fabricate something to topple the regime," the man nicknamed "Curve- ball" told the Guardian. Dear universe: If the guy who made it look like first graders were laughing at his dirty jokes is more harshly punished than the man whose lies helped create the Iraq war, you are commanded to immediately explode.

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 17 Nothing happened today, unless you count the court appearance of Keith Brown, the 55-year-old father of the classical piano group the 5 Browns, who today pleaded guilty to sexually abusing his daughters when they were children. "Utah County prosecutors charged Brown with one first-degree felony count of sodomy on a child and two second- degree felony counts of sexual abuse of a child," reports the Associated Press, specifying that Father Brown "could face a sentence of up to life in prison on the first-degree felony and up to 15 years each on the second-degree felonies." As for the now-adult survivors, who fired their father as the band's manager in 2008: "They came forward because they heard their father might be working with or come into contact with other young women and girls," 5 Browns spokesman Kimball Thomson told the AP.

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 18 The week continues with an update to a story that has upset readers since last October, when a truck driven by a woman with a more-than-three-times-the-legal-limit blood-alcohol level plowed into a group of pedestrians outside the Showbox Sodo, miraculously killing none but significantly complicating the lives of all involved. Today, Juanita Wright, the truck's 43-year-old driver, pleaded guilty to three counts of vehicular assault and one count of reckless driving, for which she was given the maximum sentence of 29 months in prison. (Sorry to harp, but... 29 months for truckular assault and 20 YEARS for elementary school trespassing and insensitive editing?? Justin Bieber is right: America sucks.)

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 19 The week continues in Wisconsin, which for the past week has been engulfed in the type of budget-based drama that could be right around the corner for dozens of broke US states thanks to Governor Scott Walker's plan to make up the state's projected $3.6 billion budget shortfall with a bill that would scale back union rights and effectively cut the take-home pay of the state's public workers by around 7 percent. "The bill would require government workers to contribute more to their health care and pension costs and limit collective bargaining to pay increases," reports the Associated Press. "Workers could not negotiate their benefits and working conditions. Unions could not force their workers to pay dues, and would face a vote every year to remain certified." Since Wednesday, the Capitol in Madison has been flooded with protesters both for and against Brown's bill, with today's estimate reaching 70,000 people. Also on hand: a gaggle of alleged doctors, who passed out fake "sick notes" to allow people to skip work and attend protests. Noticeably absent: the 14 Democratic members of the Wisconsin State Senate, who've taken themselves to Illinois to stall the vote on the bill. Stay tuned.

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 20 The week ends with god-awful carnage in other parts of the world, including Libya, where this weekend brought a brutal military crackdown on anti–Muammar el-Qaddafi protesters in the city of Benghazi (where more than 200 people were killed and 900 injured), followed by today's terrifying pronouncements from Qaddafi's son Seif al-Islam el-Qaddafi, who "went on state television to proclaim that his father remained in charge with the army's backing and would 'fight until the last man, the last woman, the last bullet,'" reports the BBC. Meanwhile in Afghanistan, the governor of the Kunar Province told CNN that 64 people (including some civilians) have been killed over the past few days in a joint operation by Afghan security forces and NATO's International Security Assistance Force. "Sayed Fazlullah Wahidi told CNN that the dead included 16 insurgents, 22 women, and 26 young boys."

Dear NATO: Aim better. Everyone else, send Hot Tips to