Maccarrone on "Milkshake"/Greenwood/Wed Sept 1/4:25 pm: Officer Maccarrone reports: "[137 years after the notorious 'curdled milk' incident described in Foucault's last masterpiece, History of Sexuality Volume One,] a young woman was waiting at a bus stop that's small and has a bench inside. She was sitting on the bench reading a book and listening to her headphones when she first saw the suspect. The young woman uses this bus stop almost everyday and has never seen suspect before.
"The suspect entered the shelter and proceeded to engage her in conversation. Because it was obvious that the suspect was 'not all there,' she felt sorry for him and did not want to be rude. The suspect said something along the lines of 'I have to get a milkshake for my mom. I'm just visiting her today. I don't want to make her mad.' She thought he might be visiting his mother, or perhaps his mother might live in the pink building close to the bus stop. She eventually stopped listening to his mumbling and did not pay much attention to him until he asked if he could sit next to her on the bench. She did not protest, and the suspect sat next to her on the small bench.
"The suspect sat down and a moment later she could see the top of his penis sticking out of the top of his shorts. She instantly stood up and saw that the suspect had ejaculated on the front of his shorts. Next she heard the suspect say, as he stood up to leave the bus shelter, 'Well, I have to get this milkshake to my mother or she will be mad. I hope you catch your bus. Bye.' She watched the suspect cross the street and enter a pink building through the basement stairway."
This is by no means the last incident. That idiot will certainly make his return.