The Escalation Dinner, South Lake Union, Wed Aug 22, 5:49 pm: Officer Marion reports: "I was dispatched to 13 Coins. When I arrived, I entered the restaurant with Officer Fox. I witnessed several people in the back of the restaurant who appeared to be agitated. Patrons in the restaurant were also pointing me in the direction of these people.

"I attempted to contact Suspect Two, who seemed to be the center of everyone's attention. As I did so, Suspect Three grabbed my arm and tried to pull me away from Suspect Two. At that time, Officer Fox pulled Suspect Three away from me and told him to sit down. Suspect Three was uncooperative. Officer Fox removed him from the restaurant.

"I remained in the restaurant to interview the remaining suspects. At that moment, Officer Rice entered the restaurant to act as backup. When Officer Rice entered, Suspect One grabbed him by the arm. Officer Rice was then forced to remove Suspect One from the restaurant and place him under arrest for obstruction.

"Once Suspect One was out, I interviewed Suspect Two. Suspect Two apparently has these gatherings on a weekly basis, and tonight suspects One and Two engaged in a verbal confrontation. At some point, Suspect One tried to punch Suspect Two. As security guards were subduing Suspect One, Suspect Two began throwing glasses and dishes at the wall near Suspect One. Suspect One, apparently, was the main aggressor; Suspect Two, however, caused the most damage." Sadly, the reason for the fight is not offered in the report.

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Of Flesh and Bone, Shoreline, Sat Aug 11, 11:05 am: The only sense that can be extracted from this confusing report by Officer Hoppers is in its opening paragraphs: "Suspect/victim drove himself to Northwest Hospital after being cut by a machete. Suspect/victim was evaluated by hospital staff. I viewed the laceration. It appeared [to be] about one inch wide and one inch deep and cut into his bone. After treatment, suspect/victim was taken to King County Jail. "The investigation of the suspect/victim revealed an apartment and vehicle that were damaged by bullets. The damage on the vehicle, a pickup, included a shattered windshield, a hole in the driver's-side door, and a shattered driver's window. The damage in the apartment included bullet holes in the windows, the wall, and ceiling..." With the word "ceiling," the coherence of the report comes to end. The rest, like most acts of violence, is meaningless. recommended

charles@thestranger.com