DEREK LUNDY

Lundy will be reading from Godforsaken Sea, his account of the Vendee Globe--that is, "the world's most dangerous sailing race," from France, around the world via Antarctica, without assistance or stopping (or shopping!), in one boat, alone. He will also show slides from his little trip, which will probably have a lot of white deck and stubble in the foreground and a lot of blue and gray in the background. Kind of like The Perfect Storm, only on purpose. Yeah, life isn't hard enough. Walker Ames Room, Kane Hall, UW Campus, 7 pm, tickets are required and are available free at University Book Store, 4326 University Way NE, 634-3400.

GREGORY MARTIN

Reading from Mountain City, a memoir of "small-town life in northeastern Nevada"--as opposed to what, camping? University Book Store, 4326 University Way NE, 634-3400, 7 pm, free.

*MARK LINDQUIST

The opportunistic, name-dropping shitbag who wrote the supposed novel Never Mind Nirvana to cash in on overheard rumors and unfounded accusations against local musicians airs his contemptible trash. Bring eggs, rotten vegetables, and a rope. U-Village Barnes & Noble, 2700 NE University Village, 517-4107, 7 pm, free.

PETER STRAUB

Subtle pulp horror writer Straub, who co-authored The Talisman with Stephen King (which despite being a bunch of hooey, contains one striking scene that must be Straub's, and has stayed with me for 20 years) is promoting a new book of SCARY stories entitled Magic Terror. You could do a lot worse. Third Place Books, 17171 Bothell Way NE, Lake Forest Park, 366-3300, 7 pm, free.

*JOSEPH DONAHUE

The author of World Well Broken and Terra Lucida and editor of Primary Trouble: An Anthology of Contemporary American Poetry reads from his work at the wonderful little out-of-the-way, poetry-only bookstore Open Books in Wallingford, which is always well worth a visit itself for their solid and unpretentious selection of new and used poetry. Something about this small, spare room as a reading venue allows one to concentrate on a spoken poem as closely as if it sat before you, alone, on the printed page. Open Books, 2414 N 45th St, 633-0811, 7:30 pm, free.

ALICIA BAY LAUREL

Calling all hippies: In celebration of the 30th anniversary edition of the acclaimed Living on the Earth--which, it seems, introduced the whole soft-edged, hand-tooled aesthetic to book publishing--Alicia Bay Laurel will read from the original guide to freewheelin', just yards from the power circle of the Honky Bear Bakery. There will also be music and everybody will sit on the floor, where an aging bachelor will break out a big fatty and new parents will tie back their children's' hair with strips of bright Guatemalan fabric. Elliott Bay Book Company, 101 S Main, 624-6600, 7:30 pm, advance free tickets available at store.

BELA FLECK

One of the major ingredients in the bland smoothie called "world music" will be discussing the new Flecktones release Outbound, in a "real-time Q & A," as well as hosting a "jamfest with an all-star cast of guest artists" as part of the Barnes & Noble Chats and Events series, broadcast live on something called the Internet. I'm just kidding, I know what all that stuff is. Last week, I found a hero: While I was serving another customer, an elderly woman came into the book store where I work carrying a videotape. Assuming I knew what she was there for, I said quickly, "Are you looking for the Kozmo.com drop box? It's behind the pillar." She stared at me for a second and replied, "I have no idea what you just said." www.bn.com at 8 pm Eastern Time, which is 5 pm here.

POETRY CONTEST

Hollywood's Famous Poets Society is giving a thousand bucks to whoever sends them the best poem under 21 lines. How about this? "These breasts/are like gifts you have brought me." I wrote that, but you can have it. Send your stuff (or mine) to Free Poetry Contest, PMB126, 1626 N Wilcox Ave, Hollywood, CA 90028, or enter online at www.famouspoets.com. The deadline is today, Thurs July 27.

*JOHN OLSON

See Bio Box. Elliott Bay Book Company, 101 S Main, 624-6600, 7:30 pm, advance free tickets available at the store.

STORYTELLING with SUSIE IRWIN

Drag the kids away from the WWF Smackdown video game and plunk 'em in front of the fabulous Susie Irwin for a half-hour of broad gestures; funny voices; slow, wide-eyed turns of the head; fairies; elves; and such. Third Place Books, 17171 Bothell Way NE, Lake Forest Park, 366-3300, 11 am, free.

TOD GOLDBERG

Kirkus Review calls Goldberg's "Hollywood" novel Fake Liar Cheat "a perfect trade paperback with all the sleaze and glamour of the old paperbacks of 50 years ago." The book is published by the venerable old house of Pocket/MTV, founded by T. S. Eliot in 1911 and presided over by him until his death during a rigorous game of Smackdown last year. Elliott Bay Book Company, 101 S Main, 624-6600, 7:30 pm, advance free tickets available at the store.

SUMMER READING

The fax says, "Today we will read all kinds of stories to write on your Summer Reading Dig Into Books journals," whatever that means. Oh, this is an ongoing thing they have for kids? Why are they having kids transcribe stories? Enjoy the air conditioning but buy at independent stores, please. And I wouldn't trust my kids with these people--this sounds like a half-baked plan at best. Barnes & Noble, 600 Pine St, 264-0156, 2 pm, free.

*JOHN HOGUE

The Seattle Chat Club hosts a lecture on "The Last Pope: The Decline and Fall of the Church of Rome," in which Mr. Hogue will cover the papal prophecies of St. Malachy and the Third Secret of Fatima, which the Pope recently revealed was about him... like, suuure. Seattle Metaphysical Library, 1000 E Madison St #B (upstairs), 329-1794, 7-9 pm, $10.

RACHEL KESSLER, MARION KIMES, FRANK D'ANDREA, ELIZABETH FALCONER

Titlewave Reading Series hosts Stranger contributor Kessler, known locally as one-third of the performance poetry group the Typing Explosion, with support including Marion Kimes, who has worked with Red Sky Poetry Theater since 1981. Frank D'Andrea is a member of Portland's Slam Team, if you like that kind of thing. Elizabeth Falconer plays original works for 13-string koto. And who doesn't. Titlewave Fine Used Books, 7 Mercer St, 324-6379, 7:30 pm sharp, free.

OYSTERVILLE RESIDENCIES

Today is the deadline for the October Writers Residency Program, October 1-31 in Oysterville on the Long Beach Peninsula, sponsored by the Willard R. Espy Literary Foundation. The writer must be originally from, living in, or writing on subjects concerning the Pacific Northwest. Applications may be faxed. If the idea of a month writing in a beach cottage in the fall appeals to you, call the Foundation for an application at 360-665-5220.

SEATTLE SLAM

Hosted every Wednesday, this is your chance to get some cheap therapy by venting all your gripes against the world in front of a crowd of seemingly appreciative loudmouths, all politely supportive while awaiting their turn to speak. Anything to do with real poetry will be the last thing appreciated in such a venue. Dutch Ned's Saloon, 206 First Ave S, sign-up begins at 9 pm, $3. Those inclined to such purgative grandstanding may also want to try contacting Adult Children of Alcoholics at 722-6117, or writing for a weekly alternative newspaper.

SPENCER SELBY, SARAH MANGOLD

Selby is the editor and publisher of Sink Press, and co-editor of the visual poetry magazine Score. He is the author of eight books of poetry, most recently Task (Tenerife: Zasterle, 1999) and his work has appeared in several anthologies. Mangold is a recent San Francisco transplant with a new chapbook, Blood Substitutes, from Potes and Poets Press. John Olson actually said of her work, "The writing is discrete and mobile, like corpuscles." I have nothing to say about that. Richard Hugo House, 1634 11th Avenue, 322-7030, 7:30 pm, $5 suggested donation at door.