How does it feel to be voted Seattle's sexiest waiter?

"This is going to look great on my resume."

What are doing for Valentine's Day?

"I don't have any plans."

Are you seeing someone?

"Yes."

Does this person have a gender?

"Male."

What was the last sex toy you purchased?

"I bought three. They were Christmas presents. A butt plug, a double-headed dildo, and a suctioning dildo that sticks to the shower wall."

Who were these gifts for? Your mom?

"My boyfriend."

So he's a bottom?

"Yeah, he's turned into one since I met him. He was a 21-year-old virgin when I met him four months ago. He followed me home from Linda's. He was one of my stalking customers."

Do you get stalked a lot?

"Yes, usually by girls. Sometimes I tell them I'm gay, unless I'm looking for a good tip. If I want a good tip I'm just really friendly."

Honorable Mention: Sam Jayne at Bimbo's.