ATTACK OF THE FEMALE DRAG QUEENS

"Female drag queens": An absurd contradiction in terms or the full sartorial evolution/realization of a gender? It's not an entirely fresh idea, of course, the "real-woman-as-drag-queen" thing. Stella Rose St. Clair, who dazzled us all with her astonishing baby-doll chic before she tragically abandoned us for NYC, writes the popular fashion blog Confessions of a Female Drag Queen, after all, so she's one damn good example. Blake Karamazov, who took female drag-camp to delightful new levels (for a real girl) and just left us for San Francisco, is another. (Absconders!) The latest of fer-realz-girly queens is Monique Jenkinson, who comes to us from San Francisco, and her drag persona is called "Fauxnique." (Get it?!) Monique, on her own and as a regular real lady, is a notable performance artist. As Fauxnique, she's grown equally, if not more, famous for having performed at Trannyshack a million times (where she was the first genuinely biological femme to ever win the "Miss Trannyshack" title!), and was even voted "Best Drag Act of 2009" by the Bay Guardian. Her draggy aesthetique falls somewhere in between Ursula Android and a rather cracked-out Florence Welch, and in her show you can expect expert dancing, innovative songstressing, drilling wit, and "diamond truths about the relationship between women and gay men." Whatever the hell THAT may be. Thrill! Re-bar, 8 pm, $15, 21+.

CAFE NORDO, DINNER AND TRUMPETS

It is part oddball museum, part madness, part show, part dinner (a five-course meal prepared by a famous chef)—Cafe Nordo's Cabinet of Curiosities is a hell of a thing to try to explain. So let us turn to an expert, one Maximillian Davis, a star/member of the ensemble cast of this dinner show/unfathomable adventure. Max tells us: "The Cabinet of Curiosities invites you to an evening of tales and laughter, musings and death, magic and... trumpets. Let us ply you with wine. Follow us! Leave your indelible impression on the Cabinet's Grand Banquet. Join us! And we will send you out into the night well-fed and full of life." Well. Jesus effing Christ, then. Sold! Washington Hall, 8 pm, $80, 21+.