Tim Soter
THURSDAY 7/12

NARK, DANK, AND A STAR FROM NYC, TIM SWEENEY

It's that quieter, gentler time of the so-called "summer" when even the most stubborn Pride hangover has long since gone to hangover hell, the vulgar and sunburny Fourth is a fast-fading tan line, and there are no more holidays of any sort of substance whatsoever to harass us until Halloween. (OH! Labor Day. No one is counting it.) Isn't it a relief? Of course it isn't. And if paganism, mass homosexualia, and/or the federal government insist on failing to adequately provide for our partying needs, we'll do what the hell we've always done, won't we: make our own fucking fun. And I think we've all reached a point in which we all can energetically concur that there are few gay-fun-makers in gay-fun-land to lead us in this quest who could possibly compare with the fuzzy little love muffin the kids call Nark. DJ Nark! Alias Kevin Kauer, progenitor of All-the-Best-Stuff-That's-Happened-in-Seattle-for-the-Last-Three-ish-Years.

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Oh, yes, now, don't you fret none, y'all! Kevin'll still be doing Bottom 40 at the Cuff this Sunday, as he does every week (go to that, too, it's fabulous!)—and probably 20 other things to boot (ditto!). But TONIGHT! (Focus!) Tonight! He is involved with this energetic party they call the Beat Down. (Subtle! Charming! I KNOW!) It's a new monthly dance party 'do (this is officially the second—it happens on the second Thursday of every month, or so they plan), happening in an old place (New Mos, which is the new old Moe's, which was something else once a few times—stop confusing me!), and hosted by the incomparable local celebupopstar Lisa Dank. (Insert stolen dog joke HERE. I dare you.)

However, Nark and Dank are not billed as the most crucial elements of this event, strangely enough, as a certain Tim Sweeney has come all the way from the magical and ever-upstaging land of NYC, where he is quite renowned as a DJ himself, they tell me. Apparently, he's a Great Big Deal/NYC Nightlife Superstar, and so! Come to see him (Tim!) and especially Nark (Kevin!) and Dank (HIDE YOUR DOGS!) and Kadeejah Streets (as if you needed any more encouragement!), but really? We're all there mostly for the Nark. Let's not kid ourselves. Neumos, 9 pm, $8, 21+.