NEWS This week's news section is overflowing with content—and by overflowing I mean "in the manner of a stopped-up toilet," and by content I mean "feces." First up is JONAH SPANGENTHAL-LEE, who boasts a scoop, of sorts, about yet more alleged misconduct by the Seattle Police Department (siding, as is The Stranger modus operandi, with those not wearing a badge). Then: ERICA C. BARNETT comes out with guns blazing—if you will pardon the expression—against a threatened crackdown on Seattle's peaceful nightclubs. ALSO: MICHAEL HOOD (a freelancer, and therefore worth noticing) infiltrates an anti-immigration conference, ELI SANDERS goes "fair and balanced" on the local supporters of a Republican presidential candidate, followed by ERICA C. BARNETT once again bashing Mayor Greg Nickels over his "lack of environmental initiative." In a word: egads. PLUS: CounterIntel and Police Beat

FEATURE Into the WoodsRarely does quality writing appear in the pages of this juvenile publication. When it does, one must pause; one must take note. This week's feature by CHRIS WEEG looks into search-and-rescue missions on and around Mount Rainier. Mr. Weeg's piece is well written and meticulously researched. Shall we compare Mr. Weeg's feature to "A Month of Sundays," a recent staff "effort" that required Stranger employees to rise before the ungodly hour of 3:00 p.m. on a Sunday, make their way to various houses of worship, and then return to their dingy apartments to pen 300 misinformed words denigrating the faiths of their fellow citizens? No, let us not make that comparison, lest we prompt Mr. Keck to despair. Yes, despair. For Mr. Weeg was once an intern—an intern forced to seek employment elsewhere once his stint in indentured servitude with your publication had been completed. Unlike the chimpanzees responsible for the disgusting "A Month of Sundays," Mr. Weeg is not on the payroll of this publication. Mr. Savage assures me that Mr. Weeg will receive a check; he will be paid standard freelance rates for his efforts. (Don't spend it all on one Happy Meal, Mr. Weeg.) But if there were any justice, any justice at all, Mr. Keck would reward Mr. Weeg with Mr. Savage's title, salary, and benefits, and finally allow Mr. Savage to slink back to the bathhouse where Mr. Keck first discovered him.