Opening and Current Runs

recommended BUMBERSHOOT
One weekend only. See the Stranger's comprehensive Bumbershoot guide (www.thestranger.com/bumbershoot) for schedules, profiles, weather reports, and hidden Satanic messages. Seattle Center, Broad St and Denny Way, 281-7788. $25-$30. Sat, Sept 2, 11 am, Sun, Sept 3, 11 am and Mon, Sept 4, 11 am.

CRESCENDO FALLS 4: CATACOMB-OVER
"A few of the sins in this episode of Crescendo Falls: blackouts, blackmail, faked amnesia, infidelity, involuntary artificial insemination, fallen clergy, a daughter prostituted by her mother, rape at a frat party, and one character who commits inadvertent patricide and inadvertent incest, due to a paternity mystery solved post delicto. Clearly, the play—a burlesque of soap operas about the bed-hopping, backstabbing antics of a powerful record-industry family and its doctors, employees, and hangers-on—is deliciously sleazy. It's also tasteless (to paraphrase one joke: 'Rape is never funny, no matter how ugly the victim'). Unfortunately, it is only intermittently amusing." (Brendan Kiley) Theater Schmeater, 1500 Summit Ave, 325-6500. $18. Thurs-Sat, 8 pm. Through Sept 2.

Sponsored

DINNER & DREAMS
Ongoing. The European-style dinner theater with cirque performers as garnish. Teatro ZinZanni, 2301 Sixth Ave, 802-0015. $99-$125. Wed-Sat, 6:30 pm and Sun, 5:30 pm.

recommended THE EXCURSIONISTS
One night only. England has sunk and two of its displaced citizens go adventuring to find the next Britannia. Featuring Jonah Von Spreecken and Christopher Bange, recently returned from their tour of the Canadian fringe circuit. Theater Off Jackson, 409 Seventh Ave S, 340-1049. $12. Fri, Sept 1, 8 pm.

LATE NITE CATECHISM
Ongoing. "The real point is not the adult-catechism monologue, but the script's gaps, in which Sister Aubrey Manning dispenses tissues to cover salacious displays of flesh and kitschy prizes to reward the dumbstruck targets of her improvisations." (Annie Wagner) ACT Theatre, 700 Union St, 292-7676. $24.50-$29.50. Thurs-Sat, 8 pm and Sun, 2 pm.

THE LOVE LIST
"One British man, Bill, receives a piece of paper on his 50th birthday from his semisuccessful novelist friend, Leon. All Bill has to do is write down his ideal mate's top 10 qualities and a matchmaking service run by a mysterious gypsy (is there any other kind?) guarantees his satisfaction. The two pals discuss, disagree, and settle on a list (including 'Trusts me,' 'Leaves me alone when I want her to,' and 'Oral sex'), and Justine, the incarnation of Bill's every wish, knocks on the door. Then, unbeknownst to Bill, Leon alters the list. Justine changes accordingly and the fun begins. The problem is that the script simply isn't worth the effort. The Love List is a farce, injected, late in the second act, with some highfalutin ideas about the pursuit of impossible perfection. It goes from kinda funny—if you're into the whole Weird Science thing—to a ham-fisted morality tale with an all-too-predictable ending." (Chris McCann) Broadway Performance Hall, 1625 Broadway, 325-3113. $24-$29. Thurs-Sat, 8 pm. Through Sept 2.

recommended THE MUSEUM PLAY
Opening. A bizarre new play about a natural-history museum, escaping mastodons, and heartbreak. Written by the estimable Jordan Harrison, directed by the formidable Marya Sea Kaminski, with set design by new Stranger Genius Award-winner Jennifer Zeyl. Little Theatre, 608 19th Ave E, 675-2055. $10-$15. Thurs-Sun, 8 pm and Mon, 8 pm. Through Sept 25.

recommended A NUMBER
Previewing. One of these kids is not like the others. Caryl Churchill's 2002 play about a father, his sons, and cloning. Featuring the excellent Peter Crook and Kevin Tighe and directed by John Kazanjian (of New City Theater), who directed an haunting production of Churchill's Far Away in 2003. ACT Theatre, 700 Union St, 292-7676. $10-$54. Fri, Sat, 8 pm, Sun, 7:30 pm and Tues-Thurs, 7:30 pm. Through Oct 1.

REWIND 1987
"Rewind 1987 is an interactive dinner theater 'experience' that reproduces a 1987 homecoming dance, with the jock, the cute nerdy girl, the tipsy biology teacher, the pack of snotty cheerleaders, the sad punk, and the rest of the gang. (Long Duk Dong was conspicuously absent.) You eat salmon, drink beer, watch the 1980s high-school caricatures caper, be cajoled to dance, and, finally, dance to 'Rock the Casbah,' 'My Sharona,' and, of course, 'Walk Like an Egyptian.' The 'experience' is half onstage, half on the dance floor, where individual audience members chat and flirt with individual characters. The audience has to get out of its seats and onto the floor if it wants to experience the 'experience.' That's a dicey proposition for Seattle audiences, famous—even at rock shows—for folding their arms, staying aloof, and generally failing to rock. Rewind 1987, which began in Los Angeles, has the potential to become another long-running Late Night Catechism if it finds its target audience: bachelorette parties, sorority outings, and other herds of young, drunken women who want to dance to radio hits from their elementary-school days." (Brendan Kiley) Last Supper Club, 124 S Washington St, 748-9975. $49-$69. Sat, 7:30 pm. Through Sept 30.

Cabaret

BURLESQUE BEHIND THE PINK DOOR
Ongoing. Novelty acts, puppets, crooners, and old-fashioned burlesque. With Paula the Swedish Housewife. Pink Door, 1919 Post Alley, 443-3241. $10. Sat, 10:30 pm.

COLUMBIA CITY CABARET
Ongoing. A "saucy cabaret," hosted by Tamara the Trapeze lady. Columbia City Theatre, 4916 Rainier Ave S, 723-0088. $15. Fri, 9 pm.

LIVE BURLESQUE
Ongoing. Hosted by Miss Shanghai Pearl. With a live dirty-blues band. SeaMonster Lounge, 2202 N 45th St, 633-1824. Free. Tues, 11 pm.

Improv & Comedy

THE COMEDY SHOP
Comedy, comedy, comedy. And comedy. Columbia City Theatre, 4916 Rainier Ave S, 723-0088. $12 adv/$15 DOS. Sat, 8:30 & 10:30 pm.

COMEDY UNDERGROUND
New comedians each week. 222 S Main St, 800-325-7328. $6-$15. Fri, Sat, 8:30 & 10:30 pm.

COMEDYNIGHT
This week: Dartanion London. People's Republic of Komedy at Mirabeau Room, 529 Queen Anne Ave N, 217-2800. $5. Wed, 9 pm.

THE EDGE IMPROV
Featuring some Bainbridge-only types as well as familiar Seattle performers: Bhama Roget, Matt Smith, and Orla McGovern. Bainbridge Performing Arts, 200 Madison Ave N. $10-$15. Sat, Sept 2, 7:30 pm.

JET CITY IMPROV
Ongoing. Historic University Theater, 5510 University Way NE, 352-8291. $8-$10. Sat, 8 pm and Fri, Sat, 10:30 pm.

LAFF HOLE!
Tonight, perfomer David Crowe appears as himself, a numismatist Lloyd Althouser, and lounge comic Kenny Beckerman. The People's Republic of Komedy at Capitol Hill Arts Center, 1621 12th Ave, 388-0569. $5. Tues, Sept 5, 10 pm.

THEATRESPORTS
Ongoing. Market Theater, 1428 Post Alley, 587-2414. $8-$12. Fri, Sat, 10:30 pm and Sun, 7 pm.

Late Night

CUPCAKE
Performers Ethan Newberry and Justin Sund make the audience's "wildest fantasies" come true through the magic of improv. Historic University Theater, 5510 University Way NE, 352-8291. $8. Sun, 12:30 am. Through Nov 17.

recommended SPIN THE BOTTLE
One night only. The monthly melange, this time with solo performer Joe Von Appen, guitar-picker Rick Miller, and writer Keri Healey, all of whom are fucking aces. Freehold's East Hall Theater, 915 E Pine St, 856-9751. $9. Fri, Sept 1, 11 pm.

SUAVE
A new show of by Douglas S. Willott and Ian Schempp that "will educate audiences on the sextracurricular arts, using instructional videos as well as some serious sensuous role-playing." Historic University Theater, 5510 University Way NE, 352-8291. $8. Sun, 12:30 am. Through Nov 17.

Special Events

BIRTH
One night only. A staged reading about birth. (If there isn't a post-reading party called Afterbirth, ask for your money back.) 911 Media Arts Center, 402 Ninth Ave N, 322-8834. $10. Fri, Sept 1, 7:30 pm.

GYPSIE NATION
Kids under 13 free. First dance free. Loyal Heights Community Center, 2101 NW 77th St, 216-1722. $9. Sun, 10 am. Through Sept 24.

Support The Stranger

JOHN LENNON JAM
One night only. A performance of John's tunes, Beatles and post-Beatles, featuring members of the Beatniks, Hit Explosin, and Alan White, drummer for Yes and the Imagine album. Bathhouse Theater, 7312 W Green Lake Dr N, 524-1300. $15-$20. Fri, Sept 1, 7 & 9:30 pm.

recommended SEATTLE SPELLING BEE
One night only. Booze and orthography. Re-bar, 1114 Howell St, 233-9873. $5. Mon, Sept 4, 8 pm.

Sponsored
Washington Ensemble Theatre presents amber, a sensory installation set in the disco era
In this 30-minute multimedia experience, lights & sounds guide groups as they explore a series of immersive spaces.