OPENING THIS WEEK

THE HOLIDAY BIG BROADCAST · Kirkland Performance Center

ONE WEEK ONLY

THE BEST CHRISTMAS PAGEANT EVER · Village Theatre

BREAD, BEER, AND CHEESE CABARET · Circus Contraption

HOLIDAY PIPEDREAMS · Seattle Men's Chorus

CLOSING THIS WEEK

A CHILD'S CHRISTMAS IN WALES · Seattle Public Theatre

A CHRISTMAS CAROL · A Contemporary Theatre

A TRANSCENDENTAL CHRISTMAS · Hokum Hall

ANNIE · Paramount Theatre

BLACK NATIVITY · Intiman Theatre

CITIZEN SCROOGE · Market Theatre

HAM FOR THE HOLIDAYS IV · Theatre Off Jackson

THE HOBO'S CHRISTMAS · Odd Duck Studio

NEW PATAGONIA · Seattle Repertory Theatre

NUTCRACKER · Pacific Northwest Ballet

OWEN MEANY'S CHRISTMAS PAGEANT · Book-It

PLAZA SUITE · RipTide Deli Theatre

Transitions

In addition to Allison Narver stepping into artistic director shoes at the Empty Space and Melanie White doing the same at Open Circle, Jennifer Lavy will be replacing Jerry Diercks as Managing Director of Freehold. Lavy was a founding member of the New World Performance Laboratory (based in Cleveland) and the Akropolis Performance Lab here in Seattle, as well as being editor of Theatre Puget Sound's newsletter.

Meanwhile, Kurt Beattie is stepping down as Associate Artistic Director of Seattle Repertory Theatre to focus on artistic endeavors. Beattie--whose Seattle roots are deep, having worked at just about every theater in town as an actor, director, writer, or administrator (including a period as Artistic Director of the Empty Space)--will continue his affiliation with the Rep in other roles, including directing Yasmina Reza's Art this spring. Beattie has been a strong advocate for new writers and local talent at the Rep; his voice will be missed.

OPENING AND CURRENT RUNS

A CHILD'S CHRISTMAS IN WALES

Solo performance of the Dylan Thomas poem by Kevin Purcell, abetted by music from David Mahler and Emily Greenleaf. Seattle Public Theater at the Greenlake Bathhouse, 7312 W Greenlake Dr N, 524-1300. $12 general, $8 anyone under 18. Fri-Sat at 7, Sun at 2. Through Dec 24.

A CHRISTMAS CAROL

David Pichette and John Procaccino alternate playing Scrooge in the Dickens classic, done for the 25th time. A Contemporary Theatre, 700 Union St, 292-7676. $20-$35. Generally runs Tues-Sun, but times and days change over the course of the run so give 'em a call first. Through Dec 24.

ANNIE

Fun lovin' singin' and dancin' orphan cutesiness until you puke. Paramount Theatre, Ninth & Pine, 292-ARTS. $16-$50. Tues-Sat at 7, Wed & Sat-Sun at 2. Through Dec 24.

*BLACK NATIVITY

Intiman trots out its holiday show (a gospel "song play" by Langston Hughes) for the third time, featuring the Total Experience Gospel Choir. "One of the best things about this annual event [is] that it introduces some amazing talent that has yet to make it onto Seattle's mainstream stages." (Rebecca Brown) Intiman Theatre, Seattle Center, 269-1900. $38 general, $28 students/seniors, $20 for youth 16 and under. Tues-Wed at 7, Thurs-Sat at 8, Sat-Sun matinees at 2. Through Dec 24.

CITIZEN SCROOGE

A mutant fusion of Charles Dickens and Orson Welles. "Give yourself the gift of not going." (Tom Spurgeon) Market Theatre, 1428 Post Alley (between Pike & Union), 781-9273. $10. Thurs-Sat at 8, Sun at 7. Through Dec 23.

*HAM FOR THE HOLIDAYS IV: GLAZING SADDLES

"So much energy and well-honed comic detail that, on opening night, I missed lots of lines due to raucous audience folk who were practically wailing and gnashing with laughter." (Stacey Levine) Theatre Off Jackson, 409 Seventh Ave S, 325-6500. $15 Wed-Thurs & Sun, $17 Fri-Sat. Wed-Sat at 8, Sun at 4. Additonal matinee Sat Dec 23, 4 pm. Through Dec 24.

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY

"A christmas play with guns and fire," the press release proclaims. Also featuring gratuitous beefcake and an exploding ex-husband. Reviewed this issue. Live Girls! at the Speakeasy Backroom, 2304 Second Ave, 568-1985. $10 suggested donation. Thurs-Sat at 8. Through Dec 30.

*HEDWIG AND THE ANGRY INCH

The world's greatest botched-sex-change rock musical. "I seriously question the intelligence of anyone who doesn't see this show. Twice." See Bio Box. (Adrian Ryan) Re-bar, 1114 Howell (at Boren), 323-0388 or 325-6500. $16. Thurs-Sun at 8. Through Feb 11.

THE HOBO'S CHRISTMAS

Sketch comedy, presumably built around a smelly, drunken homeless person. Reviewed this issue. Disgruntled Bit Players at the Odd Duck Studio, 1214 10th Ave, 729-4839. $11 ($10 with canned food donation). Fri-Sat at 8. Through Dec 23.

IN REAL LIFE

Charlayne Woodard returns with the latest episode of her life, about her early years in New York. Seattle Repertory Theatre, 155 Mercer St, 443-2222. $15-$42, $10 for anyone under age 25. Tues-Sun at 7:30, Sat-Sun matinees at 2. Through Jan 7.

LATE NIGHT CATECHISM

Those ever-popular Catholic hijinks. Seattle Theatre Project at A Contemporary Theatre, 700 Union St, 292-7676. $24.50-$29.50. Thurs-Sat at 8, Sun at 2. Running into eternity, or at least February.

NEW PATAGONIA

A Ken Kesey-esque literary lion decides he's going to have the most spectacular death of his generation. "A waste of a playwright capable of inventive work and some otherwise powerful actors." (Rebecca Brown) Seattle Repertory Theatre, Seattle Center at Second and Mercer, 443-2222. $29-$42 ($10 for anyone 25 or under). Tues-Sun at 7:30, Sat-Sun at 2. Through Dec 23.

OWEN MEANY'S CHRISTMAS PAGEANT

Ornery runt screams and snarls his way through a sacred celebration of our lord, Jesus Christ. Book-It at North Seattle Community College's Stage One Theater, 9600 College Way N, 325-6500. $18 general, $14 students/seniors. Wed-Sat at 7:30, Sun at 2. (Additional matinees Fri-Sat Dec 22-23, 2 pm). Through Dec 23.

PLAZA SUITE

If you're going to do dinner theater, I guess you just have to do Neil Simon. RipTide Deli Theatre at the Liberty Deli, 2722 Alki Ave SW, 405-TIDE. $22 in advance, $25 at the door (includes dinner). Dinner starts at 6:30, show starts at 7:30. Through Dec 23.

PRINCE BRAT AND THE WHIPPING BOY

It's not what you think, it's for kids. You should be ashamed of yourself. Seattle Children's Theatre, Seattle Center, 441-3322. $14.50-$22. Fri-Sat at 7, Sun at 2 & 5:30. (NOTE: Shows have been added for the holidays, call for details.) Through Jan 13.

THE RED BALLOON

Boy meets balloon, falls in love, must protect balloon from pin-wielding bullies. A collaboration with Scottish theater troupe Visible Fictions. Seattle Children's Theatre, Seattle Center, 441-3322. $14.50-$22. Fri at 7, Sat-Sun at 2 and 5:30. (No performance Sun Dec 24. NOTE: Shows have been added for the holidays, call for details.) Through Dec 30.

SANDERS FAMILY CHRISTMAS

A bluegrass gospel musical, set on the brink of the U.S. involvement in WWII. Taproot Theatre, 204 N 85th St, 781-9707. $17-$25. Wed-Thurs at 7:30, Fri-Sat at 8, Sat at 2. Through Dec 30.

SCROOGE!

Seattle's most cantankerous actor (and one of its best) John Gilbert does a one-man-show reading of Dickens, supported by Michael Harris leading a pre-show sing-along. ArtsWest Theatre, 4711 California Ave SW, 938-0339. $15 general, $10 students. Sun Dec 17, 3 and 7:30 pm.

DANCE

NUTCRACKER

PNB's holiday cash cow. Pacific Northwest Ballet at Seattle Center Opera House, 301 Mercer St, 292-ARTS. $15-$80. Tues-Fri at 7:30, Sat at 2 & 7:30, Sun at 1 & 5:30. (Additional matinee Sun Dec 24 at noon.) Through Dec 27.

FESTIVALS, CABARET, & COMEDY

A TRANSCENDENTAL CHRISTMAS

Nothing says Christmas like the Mighty Wurlitzer organ, proclaims Hokum W. Jeebs, and who are we to argue? Holiday flavor from Seattle's finest presenter of vaudeville and silent films. (Soon to come: The Millennium Bash, one show only, on Sun Dec 31.) Hokum Hall, 7904 35th Ave SW, 937-3613. $12 general, $10 stud/seniors, $2 discount with a phone reservation, $12 for reserved table seats, no discount. Fri-Sat at 8, Sun at 3. Through Dec 23.

BREAD, BEER, AND CHEESE CABARET

Circus Contraption's last blast of 2000. Plus, all donated cell phones go to benefit Call to Protect, a program of the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (see www.wirelessfoundation.org/02call for more information). Circus Contraption at the Breakroom, 14th & Madison, 442-2004. Fri Dec 22, 9:30 pm; $7.

HOLIDAY PIPEDREAMS

Seattle Men's Chorus teams up with noted organist David Higgs in this benefit to fund music education in Seattle Public Schools. Benaroya Hall, Third and University, 323-2992. $2.50-$25.00. One night only: Sat Dec 23, at 8 pm.

VICES OF CHRISTMAS III

Christmas viewed through the eyes of a hedonistic Venusian newswoman, among other short plays. A Theater Near You at the Union Garage, 1418 10th Ave, 726-9814. $8, pay-what-you-can on Thurs. Thurs-Sat at 8. Through Dec 30.

LATE NIGHT

*JET CITY IMPROV

Improv comedy and music. "The show goes down really smoothly. One only wishes for better direction." (Tom Spurgeon) Ethnic Cultural Theater, 3940 Brooklyn Ave NE, 781-3879. $7, $5 with student ID. Fri-Sat at 10:30.

*THEATER SPORTS

"The only improvisational show I've seen where the women performers were clearly better than the men--a welcome change from the overaggressive scene-stealing of many male-driven troupes." (Tom Spurgeon) Market Theater, 1428 Post Alley, 781-9273. Fri-Sat at 10:30, $9; Sun at 7, $5.

ELSEWHERE

THE BEST CHRISTMAS PAGEANT EVER

Bad kids overturn a church's Christmas pageant in this family-favorite tale. Only an hour long! Village Theatre, 120 Front St N, Issaquah, 425-392-2202. $5, available day of show only. Thurs-Sat at 7:30, Fri at 5:30, Sat at 2:30. One weekend only.

THE HOLIDAY BIG BROADCAST

Arne Zaslove hearkens back to the Golden Age of Radio in this popular favorite. And they're opening the show the weekend before Christmas--is this courage? Foolhardiness? Poor planning? Only time will tell.... Kirkland Performance Center, 350 Kirkland Ave, Kirkland, 425-893-9900. $18-$24 ($75 New Year's Eve benefit performance). Thurs-Sat at 8; Sat-Sun at 2 (also on Fri Dec 22); Sun Dec 31, 8 pm. Through Dec 31.

JOSEPH AND THE AMAZING TECHNICOLOR DREAMCOAT

One of those biblical musicals that were so popular in the '70s. Now the same stories are all being turned into feature-length cartoons. I can't decide which is the more appropriate format. Village Theatre, 303 Front St N, Issaquah, 425-392-2202. $22-$40. Wed-Sat at 8, occasional Sun at 7 (call for details), Sun and occasional Sat at 2. Through Dec 31.

*MYSTERIAN

"After the enormously enjoyable [magic] show, we wolfed down gigantically proportioned Caesar salads in the Magicafe and then scooted into the close-up magic theater where [magician Steffan] Soule's art continued to confound us." (Tamara Paris) Illusionz Magical Entertainment Center at 1025 NW Gilman Blvd, Issaquah, 425-427-2444. $10-$15. Fri-Sat at 8, Sat-Sun at 3. No end in sight.

CALLS

Annex Theatre seeks playwrights for Annex Hothouse 2001. For two weeks (May 12-26, 2001), Annex will host four writers who will work with directors and actors to create new pieces of theater. Call 728-8081 or e-mail hothouse@annextheatre.org for application guidelines or further information; deadline Jan 15, 2001.

Barefoot Theatre Group is holding auditions for Dario Fo's Accidental Death of an Anarchist on Wed-Thurs Jan 10-11. For information visit www.BarefootTheatreGroup.com or call 389-4977.

Encore Playhouse seeks a stage manager for Man of La Mancha, which opens on Fri Feb 2. Rehearsals have started and there is a two-week break for the holidays. Encore Playhouse is a non-equity theater company. If interested, respond A.S.A.P. to Lorraine Wagner at encorepl@aol.com.

It's Not You... It's Me is an original musical to be produced in the 2001 Fringe Festival, seeking an experienced musical director with strong piano skills. Visit www.deron.net/INYIM or call 979-3451.

Mildly Obese Bat Productions is holding auditions for Giants Have Us in Their Books by Jose Rivera, to be produced in the Fringe Festival in March. They need three men and three women who can play ages 10-35. Call Beth or Rachel at 213-0307.

Pierce County Playwright Festival seeks submissions. Mail two copies of your play in proper script format to: Dr. G. S. Relaford, 1001 S Mildred #10, Tacoma, WA 98465. Call Becca Rex at 253-779-4247 or go to geocities.com/pierceplaywrights to review new guidelines (strongly suggested) prior to submitting your script. Deadline is Jan 31, 2001.

Seattle Public Theater seeks ethnic actors (two men, one woman) for The Tragedy of King Christophe. Also seeking lighting designer, propsmaster, and tech crew. Auditions by appointment only; call 328-4848 ext. 1.

Seattle Symphony and Marvin Hamlisch have extended their audition deadline to Jan 15, 2001. Send in a resume and videotape, labeled with your name, address, phone number, and type of talent to: "Marvin Hamlisch's Search for a Star" Audition Committee, P.O. Box 21906, Seattle, WA 98111-3906. There will be no live auditions with Mr. Hamlisch. For further information, call 336-6671.

Spokane Interplayers Ensemble will audition male actors who can pass for teenagers and early 20s for a production of O'Neill's Ah, Wilderness! Auditions held on Fri Dec 22; call Tim Kniffin at 323-5934.

Stone Soup Theatre is auditioning males only for Harold Pinter's A Kind of Alaska and John Guare's General of Hot Desire. Also seeking a stage manager, a paid position. Call 633-1833.