OPENING THIS WEEK

A KIND OF ALASKA/THE GENERAL OF HOT DESIRE/THE HAPPY JOURNEY · Stone Soup Theatre

ALVIN AILEY AMERICAN DANCE THEATER · Paramount

THE CHERRY ORCHARD · Art Theatre of Puget Sound

CUPID & PSYCHE · Village Theatre

DIRTY LAUNDRY · Pork Filled Players

HI, D · Re-bar

IL BALLO DEL BRUTTO · XODO Dance Productions

THAT'S LIFE · Unexpected Productions

WHERE'S CHARLEY? · Civic Light Opera

WINNIE-THE-POOH · Seattle Children's Theatre

ONE WEEK ONLY

BARRY MANILOW'S COPACABANA · 5th Avenue Theater

THE COLORED MUSEUM · Nu Black Arts West Theatre

COMEDY COURT · University Heights Center

FOR DISPLAY ONLY · Sit & Spin

JANEANE GAROFALO · Paramount

ON BEYOND RAGTIME · Hokum Hall

TEMPLE DREAMS · Seattle Unity Church

WRECK TANGLE · On the Boards

THE ZOO STORY · Insight America Touring Theater

CLOSING THIS WEEK

BEYOND KINDNESS · Northwest Asian American Theatre

THE WOOLGATHERER · RipTide Deli Theatre Company

OPENING AND CURRENT RUNS

21 DOG YEARS: DOING TIME @ AMAZON.COM

Mike Daisey dishes dirt on his experiences at Amazon.com, weaving in other topics as well. See review this issue. Speakeasy Backroom, 2304 Second Ave, 444-4336. $10. Fri-Sat at 8. Through March 3.

A DELICATE BALANCE

Upper middle-class family strife from Edward Albee. "Brilliant lighting, brilliant costumes, brilliant set--all ruined by some of the lamest professional acting this theatergoer has ever seen. Blame the director." (Dirk Lacroix) Seattle Repertory Theatre, 155 Mercer St, 443-2222. $29-$42, $10 for anyone under 25. Tues-Sun at 7:30, Sat-Sun at 2. Extended through Feb 25.

A KIND OF ALASKA/THE GENERAL OF HOT DESIRE/THE HAPPY JOURNEY

One-acts by Harold Pinter, John Guare, and Thornton Wilder. Stone Soup Theatre, 4035 Stone Way N, 633-1883. Thurs is pay-what-you-can; Fri-Sat $12 general/$7 students & seniors. Thurs-Sat at 8. Through March 10.

BARRY MANILOW'S COPACABANA

The three-and-a-half-minute song has been stretched into a full-length musical! Lucky us. 5th Avenue Theater, 1308 Fifth Ave, 292-ARTS. $17-$60. Tues-Sat at 8, Sun at 7:30, Sat-Sun matinees at 2. Through Feb 18.

BEING INSIDE

A multi-media piece about son coping with his father sliding into dementia. See review this issue. Inertia Theatre Company at the Green Lake Bathhouse Theater, 7312 W Green Lake Drive N, 860-1897. $15 Thurs/Sun, $19 Fri-Sat, $15 students & seniors. Thurs-Sat at 8, Sun at 2. Through Feb 25.

*BEYOND KINDNESS

Matt Smith reprises his parenting seminar. "Thinking audiences will savor Beyond Kindness." (Stacey Levine) Northwest Asian American Theatre, 409 Seventh Ave S, 340-1049. $12. Thurs-Sat at 8. Through Feb 17.

THE BLUE MOON CHRONICLES

Three plays about the trials and tribulations of a young gay couple. This weekend: My Gay Son's Wedding. Next weekend: Goodnight, Blue Moon. Last weekend: Once in a Blue Moon on Friday, My Gay Son's Wedding on Saturday, and Goodnight, Blue Moon on Sunday. Northwest Actors Studio, 1100 E Pike St, 324-6328. $25 for all three shows, $15 for two, $10 apiece/$8 students & seniors. Fri-Sat at 8, Sun at 7. Through March 4.

CATCH-22

Joseph Heller's satire of military bureaucracy, adapted by the author. Stepping Stone Productions at Nippon Kan Theatre, 628 S Washington St, 781-3905. $12 general/$10 students. Thurs-Sat at 8, Sun at 7. Through March 10.

THE CHERRY ORCHARD

I think "Art Theatre" must sound a lot less pretentious in Russian. Anyhow, here's Chekhov's classic, directed by Stanislavski stud Leonid Anisimov, who's been developing a cult following for his classes at Freehold. See Bio Box. The Art Theatre of Puget Sound at Cedar Park Studios, 3737 NE 135th St (in glorious Lake City!), 568-5893. $22 advance/$24 door. Thurs-Sun at 8. Through March 11.

THE COLORED MUSEUM

This production of George Wolfe's satire of black stereotypes is dedicated to Anthony Lee (the actor recently killed by the police in L.A.). A scholarship fund is being established in Lee's name; $2 from every ticket sold will benefit this fund. Nu Black Arts West Theatre at Langston Hughes Cultural Arts Center, 104 17th Ave S, 329-3328. $18 general, $16 students/seniors. Thurs-Sat at 8, Sun at 2. Closing this weekend.

FOR DISPLAY ONLY

A solo show about a vacation in Las Vegas. Sit & Spin, 2219 Fourth Ave, 441-9484. $8. Mon & Wed Feb 19 & 21, 8 pm.

FRANKIE AND JOHNNY IN THE CLAIRE DE LUNE

Terrence McNally's popular play about unattractive people in love, often played by knockout actors who just feel ugly. Gifthorse Entertainment at the Union Garage, 1418 10th Ave, 219-3310. No price was listed in the press release, so it must be FREE! Thurs-Sat at 8, Sun at 7. Through March 3.

*GOREY STORIES

A musical based on the works of the elegant, macabre Edward Gorey. "An outrageous amount of talent and creativity went into this production--all liberally sprinkled atop Gorey's own genius, always complimenting but never overshadowing." (Adrian Ryan) Open Circle Theatre, 429 Boren Ave N, 382-4250. $15. Thurs-Sat at 8, Sun at 7. Through Feb 24.

*HEDWIG AND THE ANGRY INCH

The world's greatest botched-sex-change rock musical. "I seriously question the intelligence of anyone who doesn't see this show. Twice." (Adrian Ryan) Re-bar, 1114 Howell (at Boren), 323-0388 or 325-6500. $16. Fri-Sun at 8. EXTENDED through March 11.

LATE NIGHT CATECHISM

Those ever-popular Catholic hijinks. Seattle Theatre Project at A Contemporary Theatre, 700 Union St, 292-7676. $24.50-$29.50. Thurs-Sat at 8, Sun at 2. Running into eternity.

MASK OF THE UNICORN WARRIOR

A medieval tale of fantasy and sibling rivalry, by former Seattle playwright Y. York. Seattle Children's Theatre, Seattle Center, 441-3322, www.sct.org. $14.50-$22. Fri at 7, Sat-Sun at 2 and 5:30. Through March 10.

THE MERCHANT OF VENICE

Goldarn if that Antonio isn't the rootinest, shootinest cowpoke on the canals! Some fine actors will be twanging their way through this Wild West interpretation of Shakespeare. See review this issue. Seattle Shakespeare Company at the Performance Studio, Center House, Seattle Center, 733-8222. $18-$22 general/$10-$12 students & seniors. Thurs-Sat at 7:30, Sun at 2. Through March 4.

A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM

The most expensively produced Shakespeare in town. Seattle Repertory Theatre, 155 Mercer St, 443-2222. $15-$42 ($10 for anyone under 25). Tues-Sun at 7:30, Sat-Sun at 2. Through March 17.

THE PROVOK'D WIFE

Scornful sex farce from the Restoration, written by one of the greatest British Baroque architects. A Theatre Under the Influence at the Union Garage, 1418 10th Ave, 720-1942. Pay-what-you-will Thurs, $12 Fri-Sat, $10 Sun. Thurs-Sat at 8, Sun at 2. Through Feb 25.

*SILVER WATER

Three short stories by Amy Bloom, National Book Award nominee. Book-It Repertory Theatre at A Contemporary Theatre, 700 Union St, 325-6500. $18 general/$14 students & seniors. Wed-Sat at 7:30, Sun at 2. Through Feb 25.

THE SIZEMORE INTERVIEWS

A network news eyewitness telephone report about the invasion of Panama is actually being made by a shill in Indiana. Annex Theatre, 1916 Fourth Ave, 726-0933. $12 general, $7 students. Wed-Sat at 8. Through March 10.

WHERE'S CHARLEY

Ho ho! The only thing funnier than a man in a dress is a singing man in a dress! Civic Light Opera, 11051 34th Ave NE, 363-2809. $18-$22. Fri-Sat at 8, Sun at 2:30. Through March 10. (NOTE: The musicians' strike is still going on, so patrons may have to cross a picket line.)

WINNIE-THE-POOH

Bear gets stuck in honey jar to the delight of vengeful bees. Seattle Children's Theatre, Seattle Center, 441-3322. $21-$22 adults/$14.50-$15.50 students, seniors, & children. Fri at 7, Sat-Sun at 2 & 5:30. Through May 20.

THE WOOLGATHERER

One of the most godawful plays ever written, beloved by acting students the world over for its ludicrous emoting opportunities. RipTide Deli Theatre Company at the Liberty Deli, 2722 Alki Ave SW, 405-8433. $22 advance/$25 door (includes dinner). Sat-Sun, dinner at 6:30, show at 7:30. Through Feb 18.

YOU CAN'T TAKE IT WITH YOU

The Hart/Kaufmann chestnut about a wacky, wacky family. Oh, they're so wacky. Taproot Theatre, 204 N 85th St, 781-9707. $17-$25. Wed-Thurs at 7:30, Fri-Sat at 8, Sat at 2. Through March 10.

THE ZOO STORY

A bit of cruising in the park turns weird. The play that launched Edward Albee. They loved this production in Germany. Insight America Touring Theater at the Odd Duck Studio, 1214 10th Ave, 324-1062. Thurs-Mon at 8. One weekend only.

DANCE

ALVIN AILEY AMERICAN DANCE THEATER

A compilation of old and new works from 40 years of this noted company's life. Opens Wed Feb 21. See Stranger Suggests. Paramount, Ninth & Pine, 292-ARTS. $20.50-$43.50. Wed-Sat at 8, Sat-Sun at 2. Through Feb 25.

IL BALLO DEL BRUTTO

Or, "The Dance of the Ugly One." A new dance/spoken word piece by Kelly Lobello. XODO Dance Productions at the Chamber Theatre, 915 E Pine, 4th Flr, 548-9864. $10 general, $8 stud/sen. Thurs-Sat at 8, through Feb 24.

*WRECK TANGLE

The latest from the Maureen Whiting Company. See preview this issue. On the Boards, 100 W Roy, 217-9888. $15-$17. Thurs-Sun at 8. One weekend only.

FESTIVALS, CABARET, & COMEDY

COMEDY COURT

A frightening mutant hybrid: Improvisation meets the law. University Heights Center, 5031 University Way NE, 442-2044. $7 general/$5 students. Fri Feb 16, March 9 & 16, 7:30 pm.

DIRTY LAUNDRY: AIRING OUT THE FAMILY HAMPER

Sketch comedy skewering the American family. Pork Filled Players at Northwest Asian American Theatre, 409 Seventh Ave S, 365-0282. $8 general/$6 students & seniors (group discounts). Fri-Sat at 10:30, Sun at 6:30. Through March 4.

FRENCH CABARET ON BROADWAY

Buncha French songs, sung in French by Frenchies. Le Centre Français Européen Artistique et Culturel at Atrium B, 623 Broadway under Aoki Restaurant, 726-4843. $10 for Centre members, $15 general (includes a glass of wine). All performances at 8 pm. Sat Feb 24; Tues Feb 27.

HI, D

Hi, D is to sketch comedy as Asia is to '80s rock: a supergroup! See Stranger Suggests. Re-bar, 114 Howell (at Boren), 323-0388. $6. Mon-Wed at 8. Through Feb 28.

*JANEANE GAROFALO

Sullen, caustic comedy. See Stranger Suggests. Paramount Theater, Ninth and Pine, 628-0888. $19.50-$39.50. Sun March 18, 7:30 pm.

LET'S FALL IN LOVE

Love songs, nothing but love songs. Cabaret at the Crêpe de Paris, second level of Rainier Square, 1333 Fifth Ave, 623-4111. $42 for dinner and show, $16 show only (seating limited). Thurs at 8, Fri-Sat at 8:30. Through Feb 24.

ON BEYOND RAGTIME

Part of Hokum Hall's Euphonic Sounds: A Ragtime Celebration. Eric Shoemaker in concert. Hokum Hall, 7904 35th Ave SW, 937-3613. $12 general/$10 students & seniors; $2 discount with phone reservation (no discount for table seats). Fri-Sat at 8. One weekend only (Euphonic Sounds continues through Feb 24).

TEMPLE DREAMS

A jazz opera based on an invasion of ancient Crete, when patriarchal forces usurped the Great Goddess religion. Also featuring the Goddess Squad Bellydancers. Seattle Unity Church, 200 Eighth Ave N, 782-3363. $15 members/$18 non-members. Sun Feb 18, 7:30 pm.

THAT'S LIFE

Improvisational biography based on the lives of whoever's there. Unexpected Productions at the Market Theatre, 1428 Post Alley, 781-9273. $5. Fri-Sat at 8. Through March 10.

LATE NIGHT

*JET CITY IMPROV

Improv comedy and music. "The show goes down really smoothly. One only wishes for better direction." (Tom Spurgeon) University Heights Center, 5031 University Way NE, 781-3879. $7, $5 with student ID. Fri-Sat at 10:30.

SHADOW PLAY/THE DUMMY

More Twilight Zone episodes, with the added bonus of the ineffable Miss Intermission. Theater Schmeater, 1500 Summit Ave, 324-5801. $8. Fri-Sat at 11. Through Feb 24.

*THEATER SPORTS

"The only improvisational show I've seen where the women performers were clearly better than the men--a welcome change from the overaggressive scene-stealing of many male-driven troupes." (Tom Spurgeon) Market Theater, 1428 Post Alley, 781-9273. Fri-Sat at 10:30, $9; Sun at 7, $5.

CALLS

Bumbershoot is taking applications. Download an application from bumbershoot.org or call 281-8111. Deadline for performing artists is March 1.

Live Girls! seeks plays written by women for spring workshops. Contact Meghan Arnette at megspaz@hotbot.com or 568-1985 for details.

Seattle Opera seeks chorus members, auditions in March. Go to seattleopera.org or call 676-5590 for details.

Seattle Repertory Theatre seeks interns. Go to seattlerep.org, e-mail interns@seattlerep.org, or call Edith Bishop at 443-2210 ext. 1029 for details.