Is there anything new at the show?
The new 23-year-old hand-balancer from Russia has the perfect male body. I wish he was here right now and I could just take his clothes off because it is perfect. He can hang by a bar with one hand and bring his feet up to his forehead while hanging. It does wonders for the body. It does wonders for my body.
Particular parts of your body?
The whole thing! Tingling! He comes with another act, a Russian chair-balancer I know from San Francisco. Teatro right now is all mix-and-match, like Garanimals, and so I've worked with a lot of the people already. The tent is two meters higher here, so he won't kick the ceiling every time he does his handstand on top of his chairs.
What's the most awkward audience interaction you've had?
A man in San Francisco came up to me and said, "Remember? I'm the one with the kilt that you took off, then I threw you on the ground and jumped on you!" I said, "Oh yes!" How could I forget? I'd said, "Are you wearing anything under the kilt?" and he took it off. He was wearing the most hideous, tight, bicycle-short-type-things that had a Hawaiian print on them. He tried to dip me at the end. I didn't have my footing and I was in heels--and I'm a big girl--and I took him down. On top of me. It wasn't pretty.
Any particularly graceful moments?
I'm not sure it's ever graceful. I can't think of anything specific right now.
It's the awful moments that stick in one's mind.
They're the ones that scar you forever. Wait, there was a group of high-school students from Florida that came to a choir competition here in Seattle. They won this competition and saw Teatro, and they sang for us in the lobby--it was fun. The next year, I got a message in the dressing room that this choir was coming and they're from Florida. This was in San Francisco now; they were in another competition and Teatro was their treat again after. I went out and several of the young men in the choir were in drag. So of course I asked them to sing for me and they did, but they surrounded me afterward in the bar and said, "Wait, wait, wait, we've got a special thing for you." All the young men in drag were the choir's close harmony group, and they sang "Goodbye, My Coney Island Baby" to me. I did something I never do. I took my wig off and took my tits out and I threw them in the air. I don't know what that was supposed to signify. But they were adorable.
Brendan Kiley is on vacation. He'll be back in one week.