Thursday, August 1

9:30 NBC THE RERUN SHOW

Debut! Actors re-enact scenes from classic sitcoms like The Partridge Family and Diff'rent Strokes. Wha'choo talkin' 'bout, Willis?!


Friday, August 2

9:00 AMC BACHELOR PARTY--Movie

(1984) Tom Hanks' bachelor party is the wackiest EVER (which means the inclusion of hookers, donkeys, and guys with really cheesy moustaches).


Saturday, August 3

8:00 TNN SLAMBALL

Debut! Another dumbshit sport. This one involves a basketball, a trampoline, and football pads.


Sunday, August 4

10:00 E! THE ANNA NICOLE SHOW

Debut! Former Guess? Jeans model Anna Nicole Smith shoots for Hollywood stardom in this Ozzy-fied reality series.


Monday, August 5

9:00 NBC DOG EAT DOG

In this very special episode, Playboy playmates jump up and down and make their boobies bounce. Yep, that's about it.


Tuesday, August 6

9:00 MTV THE REAL WORLD: THE LOST SEASON--Movie

(2002) A parody of the Real World series, featuring a "lost" season set in Vancouver.


Wednesday, August 7

10:00 COM SOUTH PARK

The boys form an organization to stop asshole Hollywood directors from ruining their own films. And yeah, George Lucas, we're talkin' to YOU!!

Justin (hic!) Timberlake forever. steve@thestranger.com