Thursday, December 28

10:00 DSC QUEST FOR THE GIANT SQUID

Researchers investigate an extremely rare giant squid. Sponsored by Red Lobster's new fried calamari plate!

10:00 COM SPORTS NIGHT

West Wing lovers should check out this smart and sassy (and quickly canceled) sitcom by Aaron Sorkin.


Friday,

December 29

10:00 FX TOUGHMAN WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP

Beefy knuckleheads beat each other senseless so you don't have to.

10:00 TLC EVEL KNIEVEL: THE TRUE STORY

A peek at the life of America's favorite motorcycle-jumpin' psychopath.


Saturday, December 30

8:00 COM UP IN SMOKE--Movie

(1979) Cheech and Chong star in this dope-blowing, bong-bubblin' marijuana comedy classic.

9:30 AMC THE WILD BUNCH--Movie

Sam Peckinpah's brilliant ode to the Old West and exploding blood packets, starring Ernest Borgnine and William Holden.

10:00 COM SOUTH PARK

A compilation of the show's best musical numbers, hosted by the smelly Mr. Hanky!


Sunday,

December 31

8:00 FOX THE SIMPSONS

The history of the Simpson family is explored in this parody of VH1's Behind the Music.

10:00 ABC DICK CLARK'S NEW YEAR'S ROCKIN' EVE

Jesus Christ! Is this guy ever going to die??


Monday, January 1

5:30 ABC TOSTITOS FIESTA BOWL

Notre Dame takes on Oregon State for the greatest prize of all... a bowl of crappy, stale potato chips!


Tuesday, January 2

8:00 FOX THAT '70S SHOW

The gang gets Hitchcocked in this episode, which parodies Alfred's best films.


Wednesday,

January 3

9:00 NBC WEST WING

As Inauguration Day approaches, the country slaps their heads in shock, screaming, "Omigod! We've elected an IDIOT!"

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