STAR SIGHTINGS: On Fri 10/15 Cynthia was eating lunch downtown at swanky Palomino, when she spied comic actor Michael McKean lunching at the next table with two pals who were going over a "script-looking document" together. Most will remember Michael from Spinal Tap and Laverne & Shirley, and he often cameos as slimy evil guys (on The X-Files, for one). ··· Sat 10/23 afternoon Jeff spied "fashionably dressed" rock star Martin Fry strolling Westlake Center with a small entourage (including Seattle architect/scenester Lance Manyon -- who's rumored to be designing a love nest in L.A. for Backstreet Boy Kevin Richardson). Martin headed up the '80s band ABC ("The Look of Love," etc.), now touring in support of comeback album, Lexicon of Live. He enjoyed some rare Seattle sun before his Sun 10/24 Fenix show. ··· And was that gorgeous Angel star David Boreanaz sitting in the rain with a bunch of friends outside the Cloud Room Saturday night 10/23? Spooky indeed!

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TICKLED TO BE PICKLED: Mike asked TTS to bid a fond adieu to Nicole, "the sassy, sexy vixen who's been serving drinks and food at Hattie's Hat for the past couple years." What makes Nicole special can be summed up in something she said when asked where she'd work next: "I don't know," said Nicole, "but I just want to be around alcohol." Mike gushes, "Marry me, Nicole -- because I just want to be around you... and alcohol!" Awww!!

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A REAL HANDFUL! Marc gloats, "I grabbed Dave Matthews' ass last night!!" Marc, Kelly, Keri, Jason, and Jessica spotted the rocker Sat 10/23 at the Alibi Room -- Dave was at the next table with a group of "sorority-ish girls." As the night progressed, the two tables got increasingly rowdy, and Marc & pals fantasized about giving the famous guy a wedgie. Last call came and went, and Kelly offered Marc $100 to grab Dave's ass! Marc took the bait. "Are you Dave Matthews?" "Yes." "A friend of mine just offered me $100 to grab your ass. Do you mind?" Laughing, Dave raised his jacket and bent over -- and Marc honked a hefty handful! As Marc collected his well-earned C-note, Dave turned and yelled, "You should have spanked it!!" The "sorority girls" were not amused.

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!@#$% CANADIAN DRIVERS! Miss Leslie Miller, Q13's glamorous Canadian news princess, allegedly pulled a vehicular faux pas last Tues 10/19, as Cynthia writes: "She might be the prettiest thing in Seattle TV news, but that doesn't mean she can drive! I was crossing Western Ave at the Pike Place Hill Climb, when Ms. Miller and her shiny black Mercedes Kompressor (do you suppose it compresses brain cells?) zipped right past me! Darling Leslie tossed me a glance that said, 'Oh my! A person is about to walk into my immaculate detail job!'" Whoa... where's the fire, Les? Sounds like you're a gal in a hurry -- on your way "to the top," no doubt!

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FOOD GLORIOUS FOOD! In the Kalakala newsletter (www.kalakala.org) there's an item about our best gal Susan Powter -- the fitness queen showed up at a benefit for the fabulous old ferry toting a "multi-layered, calorie-laden dessert"! I know you want new clients, Sue... but honey, that ain't the way! P.S. Don't miss the Sat 10/30 Kalakala Halloween benefit -- they're showing Nosferatu! ··· Take two seconds and visit www.thehungersite.com, where website sponsors donate a bowl of food to a hungry Third-Worlder every time you click the button (one visit a day max). Instant karma... for FREE!! It's the American way.

Hey peoples! Thanks for those super gossip tips!! shirley@thestranger.com