I was all sorts of stoked to review the Fall Out Boy show at the Tacoma Dome last weekend. Instead of taking the "I'm Megan from The Stranger, give me free tickets" route, a friend was hooking me up with a fancy-pants laminate that would possibly allow me to corner one of the band dudes into answering hard-hitting questions while I pillaged their catered deli tray. Unfortunately, our passes fell through when stupid managers didn't answer their stupid cell phones. However, I still wanted to celebrate (uh, mock) Fall Out Boy's recent visit, even though it's a little late, so I decided to bring back the "Which Song Are You?" quiz! (I did this with Ashlee Simpson a few months back, and folks seemed to dig it.) Simply answer the question with the choice most fitting to you, and find out which Fall Out Boy song you are! Seventeen magazine should come knocking any day now...

1. You finally decide it's time to ask out that dreamy girl/boy in your math class. Where will you go for your first date?

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(a) "Lie in the grass, next to the mausoleum."

(b) To the "dance, dance!" Duh.

(c) Vampire hunting.

(d) To the Fall Out Boy show, because you worship them.

2. That "dreamboat" turns out to be a complete jerk. You run home to scribble your feelings in your journal. What do you write?

(a) "I'm just a notch in your bedpost, but you're just a line in a song!"

(b) "These words are all I have, so I'll write them, you need them just to get by."

(c) "I don't blame you for being you, but you can't blame me for hating it."

(d) "I aim to be your eyes."

3. Someone hacks into your Sidekick and posts naked pictures of you all over the internet. Oh no! How do you react?

(a) "Cock it and pull it."

(b) "I only want sympathy in the form of you crawling into bed with me."

(c) "Darling, what did you expect?"

(d) "We're still so young, desperate for attention."

4. After spending years in political hardcore bands, you decide to write bubblegum pop and make billions of dollars. Some call you a sellout. How do you respond?

(a) "I'll be your number one with a bullet."

(b) "Weighed down with words too overdramatic."

(c) "I confess, I messed up. Dropping 'I'm sorry' like you're still around."

(d) "It seems the artists these days are not who you think."

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ANSWER KEY: Mostly As? You're the band's breakthrough hit "Sugar, We're Going Down." Mostly Bs means you're "Dance Dance." Mostly Cs makes you "A Little Less Sixteen Candles, A Little More 'Touch Me.'" And if you answered mostly Ds, you're Panic! At the Disco's "The Only Difference Between Martyrdom and Suicide Is Press Coverage," which isn't a Fall Out Boy song at all, but there isn't a difference, really.

megan@thestranger.com