Watch out, Bob: This morning, pizza franchise owner and conservative Democratic state Sen. Mark Mullet announced his plan to jump into the open race for governor. "Open" is sort of a strong word, since the Democratic party has already knighted Attorney General Bob Ferguson as its champion. Plus, some of Mullet's Olympia colleagues don't exactly love him, since he's voted against workers and reproductive rights. Plus plus, there's already a bunch of gubernatorial goobers running in the middle lane who probably stand a better chance. 

Iconic: Ferguson's broad appeal will be hard to beat. The man got the thumbs-up from former Seattle Police Chief and tear gas booster Carmen Best. The Needling poked fun at Ferguson's low endorsement standards, joking that his campaign got the nod from former Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz, alleged sex abuser and former Mayor Ed Murray, and the heart of whiteness herself, Rachel Dolezal:

Screw the developers: On his way out of office, Council Member Alex Pedersen wants to stick developers with an “impact fee” on new units they build. Those fees will fund transportation projects, particularly bridge maintenance, since Pedersen failed to secure such funding via bonds last year.

Voter education, but make it yummy: Remember how Seattle voters approved Ranked Choice Voting (RCV) in municipal primaries? Don’t freak out. We won’t do RCV in the upcoming election, but FairVote Washington is getting a head start on voter education, starting with donuts. The organization invited voters to rank their favorite local donut shops to show how the voting system works. Check it out!

Speaking of donuts: EverOut can give you the real tea on the best donuts in Seattle without the democratic process!

One simple trick to avoid bloated parking rates: Starting today, parking at the airport lot will cost four times as much. Outrageous, I know. How to get around it? Take the light rail! It brings you basically inside the airport lol.

Raise the roof: The U.S. House of Representatives voted last night on a deal to raise the debt ceiling, just days before the government was set to default. Speaker of the House Kevin McCarthy pissed himself with excitement because he and his Republican goons got the Democrats to cut federal spending by $1.5 trillion over the next decade, add more requirements for food stamps recipients, and take back some COVID-19 relief funding. Despite its easy passage, 46 of the furthest left members and 71 right wingers voted against the compromise.

Jayapal says no: The Seattle Times reported that U.S. Rep. Pramila Jayapal voted against the debt ceiling deal, making her the only Washington lawmaker to do so. She said she didn’t have much of a choice: “It’s really important that people understand that this was a negotiation that was done at gunpoint. The American people were held hostages by the Republicans.” Jayapal argued that the deal fucked over poor people by cutting or limiting the programs they rely on rather than making rich people pay their fair share of taxes.

As for the rest of the Democratic delegation: Her fellow Washington Congressional Democrats mostly argued that the perfect should not be the enemy of the good, and that a default would be much worse than the Republicans’ deal. To be fair, Jayapal said she probably would have voted "yes" if she was the decisive vote. 

On to the Senate:  If the Senate passes the bill, then it will go to Biden's desk and he will sign it into law, hopefully before that June 5 deadline. So far, it looks like progressives in the Senate have similar issues with the bill.

Look who it is: Former Vice President Mike Pence must have forgotten what happened the last time he was in the White House because the man is set to announce his presidential campaign next week! Trump’s fan club called to hang Pence at the Jan. 6 riot, so he might have trouble moving over the former president’s base. But he’s got his own thing going on. He’s way more socially conservative, he was way more supportive of the U.S. aiding Ukraine, and he called for cuts to Medicare and Social Security—unlike Trump. 

Trump stays losing: Federal prosecutors got their hands on an audio recording in which Trump acknowledges that he hoarded classified Pentagon documents. This stands in stark contrast to his claims that he declassified all the documents he kept at his place. CNN has the full story. 

A very interesting question:

…a very interesting answer: The author of that tweet obviously did not see this story from the Cut, which provides some explanation for why you’re not glued to your phone in your subconscious. First, phones definitely do appear in dreams, and they do so more than computers or airplanes. But if you personally notice a lack of cell phones in your dreams, consider the “threat simulation hypothesis” of dreaming. The hypothesis suggests that people dream as a way to deal with our more instinctual, primordial anxieties in a low-stakes environment. So, you will probably dream more about running away from a predator than you dream about scrolling through TikTok. However, I always dream that I forget to check in on Slack at the beginning of the work day and various obstacles prevent me from doing so until 2 pm, or until I wake up in a puddle of sweat.

Poison in every puff: Effective Aug. 1, Canada will be the first country in the world to require a warning label not only on cigarette boxes but also on the individual smokies themselves. The goal is obviously to reduce smoking, but who knows if it will work. Studies show that in the past, big, graphic warning labels discourage smoking, but a picture of a ciggy-wiggy labeled with the phrase “poison in every puff” or “cigarettes cause impotence” sort of sounds like the perfect Lana Del Rey-core addition to any weird girl’s Instagram photo dump to me!

I need to share this: I have complicated (negative) feelings about Taylor Swift’s personal life. I would go as far as to say that we are parasocial enemies, but dammit that girl can write. For months, one of her best songs was only available on a Target exclusive vinyl and as an unauthorized podcast on Spotify. Finally, she released the track, “Hits Different,” to all music platforms. Here’s the song.