Washington House passes a Strippers' Bill of Rights: After killing the legislation last year, House lawmakers passed SB6105, a bill that improves working conditions in Washington strip clubs and repeals the antiquated lewd conduct laws in the state’s administrative code that the Liquor and Cannabis Board used to raid Seattle gay bars last month. We’ve freed the nipple and the jockstrap,  and advocates say strip clubs will finally be able to apply for liquor and tavern licenses. We’ll have more on this later!

Council really listening to community: During public comment at last night’s council meeting, asylum-seekers and their lefty allies once again asked the City to fund housing for hundreds of Venezuelan, Angolan and Congolese refugees facing homelessness. At the start of the meeting, Council President Sara Nelson limited public comment to 20 minutes. After things got loud, police removed the protesters, and at one point Council Member Cathy Moore called for their arrest because she said she feared for her safety. According to SPD, police arrested and booked six protesters on suspicion of trespass. Hannah has more here.

Bad apple? Ashley reported yesterday that the Seattle Office of Police Accountability opened an investigation into Officer Mike Rawlins after he threw a handcuffed, 58-year-old Black man to the floor, necessitating a visit to the hospital. You can read more about it here.

Shut up, planes: The Port of Seattle Commission directed staff to assess how effectively previously installed, federally-funded noise insulation still works in communities near Sea-Tac, and it approved a $5 million pilot program to repair and replace insulation that isn’t working well enough. A lot of it is not working, and failed soundproofing led to mold and other damage. The Port said it’ll be seeking matching federal dollars to help. 

Bird murder: Travis John Branson of Cusick, Washington pled guilty to illegal wildlife trafficking for helping kill 3,600 golden and bald eagles to illegally sell their feathers on the black market. Prosecutors say Branson’s killing spree on the Flathead Indian Reservation in Montana lasted a year. (“Killing spree” are his words, by the way; he literally texted buyers to say he was on a “killing spree,” according to court documents.) Court documents don’t say how many birds he admitted to killing, but who among us could remember so much death. A second suspect, Simon Paul of St. Ignatius, Montana, worked as Branson’s “shooter.” He didn’t show up to his court date. Eagles of North America could do the funniest thing right now.

Police investigating rape at Bellevue college: Administrators closed the campus after a woman told police she was raped in a bathroom at knifepoint around 9 am Tuesday. She was taken to the hospital with injuries, police say. Police initially warned of a suspect possibly armed with a knife and later said there was no ongoing threat to students or the surrounding community.

Uncommitted: Thirteen percent of Democratic primary voters selected “uncommitted delegates” over President Joseph R. Biden in the Michigan primary last night as part of a protest movement organized by local Arab American leaders in Dearborn, Michigan in response to the President’s handling of Gaza. Uncommitted delegates don’t have to cast their vote for any particular presidential candidate at the convention in August, so they can be noisy in calling for a ceasefire. Biden only won the battleground state by a slim margin of 150,000 votes in 2020, so any wavering support matters and could shift his position on Gaza. On the eve of the primary, he said he hoped for a ceasefire within a week. The Stranger endorsed the “uncommitted delegates” option for Washington voters, for reasons we explain here.

Gaza water supply at 7 percent of pre-October levels: Maurizio Martina, deputy director general of the UN Food and Agriculture Organization, said restrictions on fuel and non-functioning desalinization plants have reduced water supply to a trickle. One quarter of wells have been destroyed. He added that fuel shortages are preventing bakeries from producing bread, and that 46 percent of all Gazan cropland was damaged.

Shooting in remote whaling village of 675 people: Two adults are dead and another two are wounded after a 16-year-old boy shot them in Point Hope, Alaska, an Iñupiat village above the Arctic Circle. The boy’s father escorted him to the police station after the boy admitted to the crime. His motive is unknown. Parents were told to keep their kids home from school Tuesday so they could “hug them.”

A “Papa Swift” kick in the ass: Taylor Swift’s father, Scott Smith, allegedly punched an Australian photographer in “the chops” as the pop star and her friends boarded a yacht at a Sydney-area wharf Tuesday morning. She’d just finished the last show of her worldwide Eras Tour. New South Wales police said they are investigating an incident of a 71-year-old man assaulting a 51-year-old man, but they didn’t confirm who was involved … kind of. “We don’t confirm names of victims and offenders of crimes, but if every other news agency in the world is using those names, you wouldn’t be wrong,” a police statement said.

Two men found guilty of murdering Run D.M.C’s DJ more than 20 years ago: DJ Jason Mizell, known worldwide as Jam Master Jay, was shot point-blank in his Queens recording studio in 2002. Mizell’s own godson, Karl Jordan Jr., fired the fatal bullet after he and Mizell’s longtime friend, Ronald Washington, ambushed him for cutting them out of a lucrative drug deal.

What are we even doing: “A surge fee on your Frosty? Wendy’s to test ‘dynamic pricing’ in 2025.”