Welcome to Day 10 of the 2025 Government Shutdown: Yesterday, despite the shutdown, the senate passed the $925 billion national defense bill, which allows everything from new submarines and fighter jets to an annual pay increase for troops. That said, because of the shutdown, members of the military may not get their paychecks—for the first time in the history of America—come October 15.

Trump Did Not Win the Nobel Peace Prize: Hahahahahahahahaha! He wanted it so badly, too. Loser.

María Corina Machado Wins Nobel Peace Prize: She is an opposition leader in Venezuela who lost the 2024 election to President Nicolás Maduro. The prize committee praised her for “tireless work promoting democratic rights for the people of Venezuela and for her struggle to achieve a just and peaceful transition from dictatorship to democracy.” Kind of the opposite vibes of ol’ Trumpty Dumpty’s vibes! Sorry, Don!

Ceasefire in Effect: Israel and Hamas have agreed to a ceasefire in Gaza. Now both sides have 72 hours to make good on their side of the deal—Hamas will release the 20 remaining Israeli hostages and Israel will release “around 250 Palestinian prisoners and 1,700 detainees from Gaza.” The BBC also reports that “about 600 humanitarian aid trucks are expected to enter Gaza daily.” Read Trump’s full 20-point Gaza peace plan here.

Seattle School Board Rejects Cops at Garfield: The plan, supported by Mayor Harrell, would’ve placed a uniformed SPD officer on Garflied’s campus, but Capitol Hill Seattle reports that the school board had “concerns over disproportionate policing and the district’s failure to implement community recommendations in its proposal.”

Trump Cannot Send the National Guard to Chicago: Yesterday, a US district judge ruled that the Trump administration cannot “federalize or deploy” the national guard to Illinois for two weeks because she had “seen no credible evidence that there is a danger of a rebellion in the state of Illinois.” The Trump administration will likely appeal.

And! The National Guard Can’t Fuck with Protestors in Chicago, Either: A federal judge in Chicago also granted a temporary restraining order yesterday, blocking federal agencies from interfering with protestors and any journalists covering those protests. They can’t arrest or use physical force against journalists and they can’t use “riot control” weapons including tear gas and other “less-lethal” weapons and ammunition against protestors.

Oregon Might Not Be So Lucky: Yesterday, the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals began considering whether or not the Trump administration is allowed to deploy the national guard to “war ravaged” Portland. The 9th Circuit Court ruled on Saturday that they could not be deployed, but the Trump administration appealed the ruling and now the appeals court is being a butt about it. Judge Ryan Nelson, one of three judges on the panel (and a Trump-appointee) doesn’t really see a problem with it. “What I'm struggling with is, the president gets to direct his resources as he deems fit, and it just seems a little counterintuitive to me that the city of Portland can come in and say 'No. You need to do it differently,'" he said. EXCEPT FOR THAT TRUMP IS LYING??? There’s no war-torn city! There is no insurrection! Trump and his fascist bootlickers are trying to supress freedom of speech and the right to assemble because they want to shut up the people who are protesting his administration’s ILLEGAL ABDUCTIONS OF AMERICAN CITIZENS.

When You’re Being Mean to Portland, This Is Who You’re Being Mean to:

 

The following is REAL footage from Portland, 2025. Viewer discretion is advised.

[image or embed]

— The Daily Show (@thedailyshow.com) October 9, 2025 at 1:23 PM

 

My Brain Hurts: It was very hard to make sense of all the lawsuits and rulings and the national guard can be deployed here but not here at least for now but not later nonsense so early in the morning so please join me while I take a soothing brain break and watch a baby hippo named Mars refuse to get out of the pool.

 

 

Okay, let’s dive back into Hell!

Remember When Qatar Gave Trump a Luxury Jet? Today Pete Hegseth announced the US will build “a Qatari Emeri air force facility at the Mountain Home Airbase in Idaho."

 

Hegseth: "I'm also proud that today we're signing a letter of acceptance to build a Qatari Emeri air force facility at the Mountain Home Airbase in Idaho."

[image or embed]

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar.com) October 10, 2025 at 7:22 AM

 

MAGA Babies Plan “All-American Halftime Show”: The racist crybabies at Turning Point USA are so mad about American musician Bad Bunny being booked to perform at the Super Bowl halftime show that they’re planning their own “All-American” halftime show, which will also feature American performers. They’re asking supporters to vote on which music genres they’d like to see represented, including “Anything in English,” and some Turning Point dudes whose names I refuse to commit to memory say they want Creed to headline. 

Seattle Sports Update: At 5 pm the Mariners will play Game 5 in their post-season series against Detroit and the anxiety is palpable. We are not used to playoff baseball! We have, as a city, forgotten how nervewracking it can be! The winner will advance to the American League Championship Series to take on the Toronto Blue Jays, who are not an American team. Baseball! In other sports news, the Seattle Kraken kicked off their 2025-26 by beating the unnecessarily orange Anaheim Ducks 3-1.

Perfect October Reading: In our latest issue, notable Seattle goth Bess Lovejoy wrote about the Comet Lodge Cemetery on Beacon Hill and all the little children who have haunted the area for generations. It’s a must-read, especially on this perfectly drizzly October day.

How about one more Mars video, as a palate cleanser?

 

Â