Biden’s abroad. President Joe Biden took part in the "Three Amigos" summit for North American leaders today, with an agenda covering trade practices, crime, and dependence on China for goods and supplies. The Biden administration is also pressing Mexican President Andrés Manuel López Obrador to crack down on drug cartels, while Mexico is dealing with a surge in gun-related homicides and wants the US to stop weapons smugglers. The summit is also taking place amidst a migration dispute, with congressional Republicans criticizing Biden for allowing more people to cross into the US. Last week, Biden announced new immigration policies that will expel around 30,000 people per month who have crossed into the US from Mexico.

And on the topic of Biden… Joe Biden has condemned riots by former Brazilian President Jair Bolsonaro supporters as more people are calling for his expulsion from the United States. Bolsonaro, who is facing investigations into allegations of spreading election misinformation, has been in self-imposed exile in Florida since last month. Numerous Democrats have called for Bolsonaro to be removed, citing the similarity between the Brazilian riots and the storming of the US Capitol on January 6, 2021. While Republicans have not joined the calls for deportation, a handful, including Florida Senator Rick Scott and Congressman George Santos (who says his parents were born in Brazil, but who even knows with that guy), have condemned the protests.

That’s life in the big city. Whether you love this or hate this says a lot about you. 

Can’t wait to see what Republicans do with this. Joe Biden's lawyers announced today that several documents from his time as vice president were discovered in a private office in November 2022. Biden’s personal attorneys were packing files when they came across the documents and reported them. It’s not clear what’s in the documents, but Attorney General Merrick Garland has asked the US attorney in Chicago to investigate.

A falling tree killed a woman in Fall City today. Responders attempted to revive the woman with CPR, but were unsuccessful. The King County Sheriff's Office is investigating the incident, which occurred during a statewide wind advisory. 

Lisa Herbold loves a dump. Herbold is attempting to reduce the construction of new housing on a lot currently occupied by a run-down old Walgreens, according to Erica Barnett at PubliCola. The building is slated for demolition, but Herbold’s proposed landmark protections would preserve the shitty old drive-through (yes, really) and squeeze a handful of new residences into the corner of the lot while jacking up the price of construction. And you may be wondering: Does this shithole even have any historic value? Well, sure, if by “it’s historic” you mean “I’m mad that I got old and I don’t want anything to change ever because it reminds me of my own mortality even if that means nobody else can afford a place to live.” Just something to think about during the next election!

Here we goooooo. The Washington state legislature began its 2023 session on Monday, convening in person for the first time since the COVID-19 pandemic began. The session, which will last for 105 days, will include debates on the state's two-year budget and discussions on issues such as the housing shortage and drug possession laws. Democrats hold strong majorities in both the state House and Senate and will be in control of the proceedings. Governor Jay Inslee is expected to deliver his annual State of the State address on Tuesday, during which he will outline his own agenda, which includes a $4 billion proposal for new housing.

Is anyone else getting a metric fuckton of robocalls today? I’ve been getting a nonstop deluge of recorded calls from “The National Committee for Volunteer Firefighters" and “American Police Officers Alliance.” What’s bonkers about these calls is that you can call back and get a different recording, thanking you for calling back and then asking for a donation. If you talk to the recording, it’ll run through a variety of semi-appropriate pre-recorded responses, so it’s either doing some kind of speech recognition or there’s a silent person on the other end clicking on a soundboard. Anyway, if you want to give it a shot for yourself, try calling 1-877-538-1507, or 1-844-428-2920, or 1-800-651-8954. Am I including those numbers so that they’ll come up in search results for people trying to figure who's calling and whether they should pick up? Maybe!

I sure could go for a tapeworm right now. A new study has found that rising sea surface temperatures in Puget Sound may be causing a decline in certain parasite populations (despite how it sounds, that’s a bad thing). The research analyzed the world's largest dataset on parasite abundance and suggests that a decline could impact the stability of the entire Puget Sound ecosystem. 

More details are emerging about the teacher shot by a 6-year-old student in Virginia. The teacher, Abigail Zwerner, was struck in the hand and chest but was able to escort her students to safety after the shooting. There were between 16 and 20 students in the classroom at the time of the shooting, but no students were injured. The shooting took place at Richneck Elementary School in Newport News, and the child responsible has been taken into custody and is receiving treatment at a medical facility. A temporary detention order has been placed on the child by a court.

This weekend was Antho Northwest. Looks like everyone had a great time and were on their best behavior (no unfortunate incidents involving a hot tub).

No crabs for you. Crabs are still too small to harvest, according to the Washington Department of Fish and Wildlife, so the crabbing season will have to wait. It’s quite a delay compared to last year, when it began at the start of December. There’s no word on when the season could begin.

Whodunnit, and what even is it? Here’s a fun look at the making of Glass Onion, with interesting details about how the glass sets complicated everything, what’s going on with everyone’s costumes, and how Rian Johnson is preparing for the next film.

Lol, and also LMAO. Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene claims to have been shut out of her Twitter account for using a copyrighted song by Dr. Dre in a video without permission. According to Dr. Dre, "I don’t license my music to politicians, especially someone as divisive and hateful as this one."

Breathe easy. The United Nations has released a report stating that the weakened ozone layer is expected to be fully restored within the next few decades. It’s due to the success of global efforts to stop using chemicals that were damaging the ozone layer in the upper atmosphere, the report says, and highlights that China has largely eliminated rogue emissions of one such chemical, CFC-11. The report also predicts that ozone holes will recover by 2045 in the Arctic and around 2066 over Antarctica. The report was compiled by scientists from the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, NASA, the World Meteorology Organization, the United Nations Environment Program, and the European Commission.

Good news for aardvark lovers. A 9-year-old aardvark in Ohio has provided a blood donation that helped save the life of another aardvark who was suffering from a tooth-related infection. The patient is reportedly doing fine, though personally I’m concerned that both animals might now be vampires.