Born and raised in Seattle, stayed until I was 30, and come back every year. The whole "Real Seattleites don't use umbrellas" is bullshit, usually espoused by people who didn't grow up in Seattle from what I can tell. Umbrellas are a pretty useful tool for staying dry (and warmer) in downpours. 'Nuf said?
So today Dan complains about muscle posters in gyms and Charles complains about umbrellas in Seattle and both think that their venting is worthy of wasting our time.
Mudede can't resist the opportunity to dictate the terms and conditions of personal conduct, to be imposed by regulatory coercion, and if needed the force of state power.
I love a big umbrella. I use one. Only when i have the space. I can appreciate what I think is the sentiment of the piece. Share the city, share your space.
also, @8, shut up. You are one of this site's most prolific complainers.
13, 14, correct. These are golf umbrellas. The people carrying them are your new lords; they come from golf places such as North Carolina, Virginia, South Carolina, Florida, Texas and Arizona. the sidewalks belong to them now. get off their sidewalks.
There is so much going on in this country with our bat sh*t insane president, his white supremacist administration of death and destruction, and a wholly corrupt and complicit congress AND THIS IS WHAT PEOPLE ARE FOCUSING ON, UMBRELLAS? SERIOUSLY? NO WONDER OUR SOCIETY IS IN FULL ON DESTRUCTION MODE. YOU PEOPLE ARE TOTAL MORONS. WHO GIVES A F**K ABOUT UMBRELLAS BIG OR SMALL OR NOT AT ALL? JFC PEOPLE GET A GRIP ON REALITY. ARE YOU REALLY THAT F*CKING REMOVED FROM THE SH*T SHOW WE ARE CURRENTLY DROWNING IN???
@18: Calm down. While this post is silly -- it's still an editorial exercise on off-beat topics, and I'm sure there are articles that more fully address the pressing issues of the day that you easily dial up.
The greatest loathing of real cities will always express itself as a desire to restrict the behavior of its inhabitants, to quell their variety. This is the desire to make cities smaller, narrower places, it is driven by simple hatred of all that is big and vital and beautifully uncontrolled.
Do not be fooled by the man who expresses this hatred in one breath, and insists he loves cities in the next. This man loves only a small, narrow fantasy of a city, culled from books and movies. This man can not stand a city that lives relentlessly in the present, imposing at every turn the immediate cultural moment in all of its sprawling, uncurated enormity. This man wants a little tiny toy city, built mostly from pieces of the past-- the drag queen on roller skates prances just so, the music is the music of this man's youth, the grey men in grey suits stand stock-still on the right side of the escalator, and march in lockstep on the left. Perhaps they wear fedoras.
This man who loves only a small idea of the city is a man of small mind; this man is inevitably an ideologue.
"This man can not stand a city that lives relentlessly in the present, imposing at every turn the immediate cultural moment in all of its sprawling, uncurated enormity. This man wants a little tiny toy city, built mostly from pieces of the past-- the drag queen on roller skates prances just so, the music is the music..."
Pretty sure he just wants people to stop using unnecessarily large umbrellas.
Ha ha, fair enough. He certainly is opinionated, I'll concede that. But then that's part of what makes him such a fun read, in my humble opinion. And I also have a strongly burnt and quite fond early childhood memory of watching Andy Rooney purchase himself a gallon of gasoline, then vehemently demand his 1/10 of a cent change from the attendant, so perhaps my humble opinions should be taken with a grain of salt.
No one has a gun to your head forcing you to read posts, and I'm pretty certain that non-existent gun is also not compelling you to post whingey comments complaining about reading things you are under no obligation to read in the first place. In short: the only one wasting your time around here is you.
If your time is so valuable, perhaps you should consider spending more of it elsewhere; I seriously doubt anyone here would complain about THAT.
@24; FTW. Congratulations, that is one of the best parodies of Charles' pretentious, overwrought writing style I've yet read. Spot-on true in content as well as style.
People who drive cars don't use umbrellas. Those of us that do things like needing to get to jobs after standing in a sideways blowing downpour for twenty minutes because the bus mysteriously didn't come when it was supposed to use umbrellas. You can always spot someone who drives most of the time by the 'no real Seattleite's use umbrellas' lameness.
More like full Emmett Watson...
Only for Golf.
Otherwise no.
He and Our Betters know what's best for Seattle.
also, @8, shut up. You are one of this site's most prolific complainers.
This comes out in hypocritical whining and almost-functional alcoholism.
Do not be fooled by the man who expresses this hatred in one breath, and insists he loves cities in the next. This man loves only a small, narrow fantasy of a city, culled from books and movies. This man can not stand a city that lives relentlessly in the present, imposing at every turn the immediate cultural moment in all of its sprawling, uncurated enormity. This man wants a little tiny toy city, built mostly from pieces of the past-- the drag queen on roller skates prances just so, the music is the music of this man's youth, the grey men in grey suits stand stock-still on the right side of the escalator, and march in lockstep on the left. Perhaps they wear fedoras.
This man who loves only a small idea of the city is a man of small mind; this man is inevitably an ideologue.
Pretty sure he just wants people to stop using unnecessarily large umbrellas.
Perhaps you should read up a bit on this man. This man wants many, many things, and has not been shy about demanding them.
No one has a gun to your head forcing you to read posts, and I'm pretty certain that non-existent gun is also not compelling you to post whingey comments complaining about reading things you are under no obligation to read in the first place. In short: the only one wasting your time around here is you.
If your time is so valuable, perhaps you should consider spending more of it elsewhere; I seriously doubt anyone here would complain about THAT.