If You Are Confused About Where to Draw the Line with Sexually Harassing Me at Work, I Will Invoice You

Comments

1
The rich get richer.
2
Should be applied to current employer, too.
3
I think this is a great idea!

Here's another related one: "amplification"
4
I might feel the teensiest bit sorry for these poor befuddled men asking stupid rhetorical questions like "How do you know where to draw the line?" and lamenting that now they have to second-guess every workplace behavior if it weren't for the fact that every single goddamn man getting taken down for harassment did it to a perceived inferior.

These men weren't making "whoops, I didn't realize that could possibly be harrassment!" comments to their bosses or their CEOs or their big-kahuna clients/donors/investors. Nope, they were "accidentally" brushing up against colleagues or people below them on the corporate ladder. They were presenting their bathrobe-clad bodies to people with less power. They were doing these things without repercussions because hey, men have always grabbed their secretary's ass (but not their boss's ass or their boss's wife's ass) and gotten away with it.

So spare me the man tears and quit it with the "it's so HARD these days to know how to behave!" bullshit. You know how to behave. You're just scared that you're going to get called out for some shitty behavior so you're trying to create plausible deniability.
5
All sarcastic invoices will be paid in dick pics.
6
@4: Perfect.
7
i think that $30 service is probably worth it. its better than getting fired.
8
Well said, Sydney! Also, as a long-time (& male-privileged / heterosexual) fan of Dan Savage (my partner is jealous when I talk about him), I completely agree with *YOU* over him in the recent Blabbermouth argument about workplace romance. Just don't do it! If you're the one in power, don't hit on, flirt with or otherwise initiate any sexualized interaction with your direct or indirect report or anyone "lower" than you on the workplace hierarchy. I don't see as big a problem with a respectful, peer-to-peer inquiry, but I pretty much agree with you even on that - not *at* work! We have the internet, no one needs work to meet romantic partners nowadays. Also, hetero-men are oblivious by default, so we can *not* rely on them to understand what is "appropriate" or "innocent" in this realm. Invoice away!
10
@9 Don't tell people what to do.
11
Journalists refer to that as a screed. Maybe some more practice facebook posts are in order.
12
Hey Sydney,

Thanks for re-re-re-re traumatizing me. I totally needed yet another reminder of how I was sexually assaulted. It was crucial for me to be reminded that the type of sexual assault I suffered didn't exist as a category until 2012(female to male attempted rape), the failed attempts at treatment*, the fact that even Dan Savage sees experiences like mine as an inconvenient rounding error that are totally acceptable to brush aside. It's actually good that the only way for me to not have what happened to me shoved in my face would be to go into a cabin in the woods, I was getting too uppity anyway.

*Services for men that were sexually assaulted are non-existent and it is extremely rare that people will actually believe that it can happen at all, much less to you

Sincerely,
Anon

P.S.- No, you don't know what it's like. If it happened to you there is an entire infrastructure dedicated to give you help, support, and understanding. You have a side that you are a part of. You aren't an enemy of all because you paid the price of reason and proper conduct.
13
I keep hearing men asking about what would be considered harassment. I'm not sure I really get the question. It's pretty straightforward.

For those who are unlear a decent rule of thumb would be, if you wouldn't want an unknown man to do it to you then don't do it to her. Pretty simple.
14
Excellent! Do you take cards? Also, there is a Moroccan tapas ad next to these comments that sounds awesome. Can invoices be paid in Moroccan tapas, because that sounds yummy? Also, if a guy doesn’t know what harassment is, then he is probably unaware of a lot of things in his surroundings.
15
I didn't see pussy grabbing (a presidential favorite) on the list. My Xmas bonus is coming next week and I want to buy some in advance. Would you offer a punch card (pun may or may not be intended), like I pay for 10 kisses and I get to grab your ass for free?
16
#4 Shimmydoowop is a genius!

Every time I've been sexually harassed at work -- starting 44 years ago, yup, it's been someone with more power.

I defied them, refused to take it -- even when I was threatened with being fired.

I'm 67, and worked in a public place -- and was sexually harassed there by complete strangers, their power being larger younger men when I was alone.

One, exposed himself to me -- and the police wouldn't arrest him, because it was a misdemeanor, they didn't witness.

I agreed to perform a Citizen's Arrest, but the cops didn't want to do the paperwork, or the courttime, I guess.

So they hauled him off to a psych exam and 3 day observation.

And I had to worry he'd be back in four days.

Maybe they gave him a talking to, because he didn't return -- but I wonder if the next time he will rape.

18
there should be a "or work it off in the gulag" of some sort to this schema for those too cheap or broke (ie you're paid by a third party who handles the invoicee's bill). it's one thing to invoice, another to get paid.