The First Junk: Donald Trump's Dick Could Be the First Presidential Dick We All Get to See (But It Won't Be the Last)

Comments

1
Stormy Daniels' name on the hush agreement was Peggy Petersen, aka "PP". We're likely going to see our first Donald Trump pee pee photo (but it won't be the last).
2
FFS NO ONE AND I MEAN NO ONE WANTS TO SEE THAT!!!!!
3
Take two...

NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE
4
Eww...just ewww! I hope I can get a warning before accidentally seeing it cuz that $h1t can't be unseen!
5
And now ladies and gentlemen, Sarah Hucksterbee Slanders will pout, furrow her brow, and inform us whether the "encounters" involved full Bravo Delta/balls deep or just the tip.

Yet another of our timeless, classic Great Moments in American History.
6
I thought these 4 years were going to suck but it's really exceeding my expectations. I do not need to see Trump's junk.

7
I didn't want to hear about this bullshit in the 90s and I don't want to hear about it now.

The mutterings from abroad are that the Americans are being weird about sex, again.
8
any german speakers know the word for “not something i need to see but thrilled that they might be released if they exist”
9
Ah, you know Benjamin Franklin would have been all over sexting. But yikes, talk about the need for a trigger warning if these Trump pictures exist.
10
Wouldn't sharing such pictures be revenge porn?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Revenge_po…

Even as much as I hate Trump I do not see how distribution of such images would be "OK".
11
10
Relax.
Trump is a Nazi so its OK.....
12
Wow 282 comments in less than one month (!) (??? srsly?) and finally bub gets it right.

@10 Most definitely against the law and morally wrong in literally every conceivable context except this one
13
How soon we forget how Trump stood around naked on Seattle street corners for a few weeks in the summer of '16.
14
This was a terrific read, Dan.
15
Not to mention the plethora of fake Stormy and Donny assignations that are surely being pixilated all over the world now.
16
I don't know about you guys, but I already see a dick every time I see him.
17
Sup, we know about the affair. We heard some stuff about being spanked with a magazine. What's left to enforce either way? Cats don't stuff themselves back into bags...
18
shorten the process!
shorten the process!
19
I have long made the exact same analogy Dan just did. We went from exposure of past marijuana use being a career ender for a political figure (Justice Douglas Ginsburg, anyone?) to it being ho-hum. Our last three presidents before the incumbent admitted to marijuana use ... and more for the last two. Likelwise, the ubiquitousness of cameras on cell phones makes it inevitable that nudes of future politicians will surface. Naked selfies exchanged with lovers get saved. People document those naked laps college kids do after getting shut out in beer pong, or that mass stream on the first snowfall or first day of finals. And eventually, these political nudes will be as expected as confessions of marijuana use.

But I assumed the first would be a millennial or post-millennial, someone who grew up in the digital age. I did not expect the first would be a septuagenarian who might know how to tweet but can’t figure out email and doesn’t touch a computer.
20
Chill out about Trump's dick pics, folks. I'm sure it'll be nothing.
21
Oh I wouldn't worry too much about inadvertently seeing the presidential penis - unless the image has been greatly enlarged, it'll probably won't look much different than the smallest pinky-finger on his tiny little hands.
22
Oh, Dan, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
This shit is entirely why I avoid Twitter altogether!
23
No story about the JAMPAC lawsuit against Your Beloved Dems? --- https://jampac.us
24
@23,

Uhhhh, clicked your link there and was taken to a page indicating the site may not be secure and I could be putting personal information at risk. So I instead googled "jampac lawsuit" and found..... not much! I did check out this article on a case that was dismissed last year. Is that what you were talking about?

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/powe…

25
If this ends up also being next week's top-of-the-Lovecast rant, I will not be surprised.
26
@16: Excellent!
27
Well... Bill already gave us First Spunk.
28
If the pic is just a dick, how credible will the claims be that it's not actually Trump's dick? I mean from an IT perspective, how likely is it that it can be demonstrated to be a picture from Trump's phone and/or text messaging service?

As to this: “not something i need to see but thrilled that they might be released if they exist”. How about: Unninteressante Sehensmoeglichkeitsbegeisterung. I couldn't pack it all into one word, per se.
29
Got to disagree with you here, Dan. We do not need to see Trump's mini-peen for any reason, EVER!
30
The less I see of Donald Dick and Mickey Mouse Pence the better.
31
@16 Urgutha Forka For the win!
32
This country is so stupid.
33
@32: Morons Are Governing America.
34
16 and 32 ... yup.
35
Edit to 34: 16, 32, and 33 ... yes.
36
Tom @ 28 - He just might have to show his junk in court to prove the pics aren't his. Now wouldn't that be funny?
37
I also want a lawyer who voluntarily pays my own expanses.
38
Hopefully this will be the last dickpic we might see because the US will wise up and only nominate women for presidente from here on out.
39
@26 nocutename, @32 EmmaLiz, @33 Knat, @34 & @35 kavita: Agreed.
@36 Ricardo: I feel too sick at my stomach to laugh.
@38 2CV: I certainly hope so. We've got to get rid of the Koch Brothers, Heritage Foundation, NRA, and far too many pigs in Congress--preferably in industrial sized garbage scows--first. The White Trash House is in dire need of a thorough scrubbing.
40
Griz @ 39 - I know, I felt like the TV host having to try not to vomit in her mouth as I was writing it.